Never get married?

Question

Why is it considered immoral to be in a relationship and have children before marriage? What if you never want to get married and stay in a loving relationship with your partner your entire life. Who decided this and why? Do you really need a peice of paper saying that your together?

Answer 1

I agree with you, but in society things such as taxes and social security can be adjusted to whether ur married or not. I personally dont think a person needs a piece of paper to say that your in love, can start a family, and be married in your hearts. If its gona last then your already married in your hearts, no amount of paperwork can say otherwise. Why do you even need to formally get married, isnt it enough for the 2 people to marry in seclusion without even needing a priest. All the priest does is lead a ritual and have the paperwork filled out and name to the world your married. A person can make their own ritual and have someone lead it if need be, but at least then its in line with their beliefs and theyd be happy with it.

Answer 2

if that's your choice then do what you feel is right. marriage isn't for everyone. you just need to make sure you have things documented on placement of your child, funeral arrangements and a will updated. if not you or your partner could find things difficult should anything ever happen. and now a days most state will require you to have something similar to a divorce if you've been shacked up for so long. love is not defined to a piece of paper so good luck with your decision.

Answer 3

You are living in a different time and age then when the process was first set up. Now, things are different because of more people, more problems, and more freedom. The main reason marriage was performed in the first place was for you to commit your vows to God. Thus, assuring that you understood God blessed your marriage. Like all time honored and traditional things, it is hard to change. Marriage now a days is not a commitment, it is more of a fairy tale or play. Hope that helps, thanks and have a great day!

Answer 4

2. Marriage certificate.

When a bride and groom stand at the altar and declare their consent before the Church, it’s not merely a formal recognition of something that already exists between them. At the moment they give their consent, bride and groom are fundamentally changed. They become right then and there (and only then and there) husband and wife. What did not exist five minutes before does exist now- a marital bond sealed by the Holy Spirit that, once consummated, can never be dissolved by anything but death.

Sexual intercourse is the expression of this bond. It’s the visible sign of this invisible reality. If this bond doesn’t exist between a man and a woman, sexual intercourse between them is utterly void of its ‘raison d’etre.’

Regardless of how much passion, feeling, and sentiment may be involved, such acts of intercourse can never be acts of true love. If the couple understand what sex and marriage mean, and live out of respect for that meaning, then the thought that they would have sex before God establishes the marriage bond between them (via their consent) is unthinkable.

A couple who is regularly engaging in sex before they marry, and sees nothing wrong with it, demonstrates that they don’t understand the meaning of sex and marriage. Such a couple will most likely fail to comprehend the significance of the marriage bond altogether. They’ll tend to reduce the change in their relationship to a piece of paper --- a “Marriage Certificate” --- and continue having sex as they always did.

The fact that the couple is now married does not automatically make their sexual union what it’s supposed to be. Sex is only what it’s supposed to be if it expresses the commitment to free, total, faithful, and fruitful self-giving. There are many married couples who have plenty of sex that actually violates their own wedding vows. The fact that it’s happening after the wedding has taken place doesn’t make it OK.

Instead of framing the discussion in terms of premarital sex vs. post marital sex, it’s much more accurate to speak of non-marital sex vs. marital sex. It’s impossible for unmarried ppl to have marital sex. They have no marriage bond to express, no wedding vows to renew. On the other hand, while the existence of marriage bond is no guarantee that sex will always be marital, it is absolute prerequisite for the possibility.

Answer 5

When people ask me how my married life is I simply tell them that it is just like dating, but now the government knows. We have a piece of paper that says it is official now. But signing that paper did not make us love each other any more or less. We are just as in love as we were before. Paperwork doesn't change that.

Answer 6

If someone and their partner have already commited to each other for life, in my book they're married, because that's what I consider marraige. It doesn't matter what the church or the government says.

Answer 7

If there's one thing I learned while reading Shirley Jackson's "The Lottery" in school, it is that tradition can be a very dangerous thing. We don't have to do things the way our ancestors did, we should know by now that there are better ways of doing things. I'm all for the "life-partner" relationship.

Answer 8

"What if you never want to get married and stay in a loving relationship with your partner your entire life."

If that's your plan then why not do the respectable thing and get married? Otherwise you are just shacking up.

Answer 9

Given the number of divorces, I'd say the paper and the commitment of many is meaningless. If you two are good to each other, it is no business of mine, but I do wish you a love and happy life together.

Answer 10

In a lot of states, you will be considered married under "common law" if you live together long enough. I think most religion created marriage to discriminate against those not choosing to participate in their rituals.