Ok Im 14 right now but lately me and my 18 year old boyfriend have been talking about marriage.. he brought it up not me. He said he wants to spend the rest of his life wit me n wants to have kids n a house n asked what id say if he asked me to marry him. I just dont know! I have very strong feelings for him and everything feels so right ya know liek its supposed to be this way. And everyone says your to young to be in love to both of us. But we are. And people just dont understand and I know im gonna get an answer here that says your to young to know what love is blah blah blah. And I also know not to ge hurt that u all think he just wants to have sex wit me then leave n he is just saying this to get into my pants. but it aint liek that. His mom called me and said he is moving to fast n we shouldnt be thinking about marriage. And his friends r always talking about how wrong it is. I just need some help. IDK what my mom would say. I really want this.
2007-07-20 04:36:44 · 35 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
yes way to young!!!! Please wait!!!
2007-07-20 04:39:40 · answer #1 · answered by GB 2 · 2⤊ 1⤋
If you're in Indiana, it's OK. Otherwise, if he's 18 and you're not even 15 yet, then he's considered a child molester and any sex you two have can be considered statutory rape and he can go to jail for it. You don't know what love is all about yet. You must not have a life outside of this boyfriend to talk about. A guy over 4 years older can really make you feel like something special since he's spending his time on you, when it may be because he feels superior to you and can't handle girls his own age. He could turn out to be a big problem for you and a heartache as well. I wouldn't do anything rash if I were you.
2007-07-20 04:50:04 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well, I'll start by saying me and my husband have been together 10 years and I met him at age 15. We did not get married however until I was 18. I love my husband and do not regret marrying him, however I do regret doing it so young and soon. I missed allot of things in my teenage years that I can never do again due to being so involved with him. In a nutshell I missed all of the fun years of my childhood.
I did change too, How I view him now is different then how i saw him at age 15. I was always mature for my age.. I was hanging out with 20 and 30 year old people at age 13. I thought I knew what I was doing and moved out of home at age 14. And now I sit and look at my life and my two baby's and I would not trade them for the world, But it doesn't change the fact that I missed ALLOT of my life and the fun memories I could have had if I wasn't tied down to a serious relationship so young.
My best advice to you would be to wait. if he truly loves you he will wait for you. Live alittle more, have fun, live carefree. Then when your done with school see how things are and commit to him then. Good luck hun.
2007-07-20 04:47:42 · answer #3 · answered by yvy2112 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
15 is not too young to fall in love, that's normal. But marriage is not about love, it's about partnership. A married couple shares children, a home, all finances, spend every night and every morning together, must agree about 95% of everything they purchase including all the food in the cupboards, and take on the responsibility of caring for each other's families.
It's very sweet that your boyfriend cares deeply enough about you to offer marriage. But, what exactly does he have to offer? He has graduated? He has a full-time job? He has a checking account? He can cook you a meal, clean up afterwards and knows where to put away all the clean dishes?
When I was growing up, there were several girls in my high school who married the summer after they graduated. Right now your goal should be to earn a diploma first and then you might be old enough not to have to ask if you are too young.
2007-07-20 04:46:54 · answer #4 · answered by Candace Hill 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not going to tell you NOT to get married but let's think of it this way. He's 18, you're 14. Is he going to college? What kind of job can he get? What kind of job can you get? Will you be able to afford college if you want to go? If you don't further your education you're most likely stuck at some job being a secretary or working at a grocery store where you will never make much money. Odds are, while you might one day be able to afford a house, it won't be very nice. I know you're in love and care about him. But think about all the stuff you want out of life and if getting married will allow you to have that. It's also proven that the brain doesn't fully mature till almost 25 years of age. He and you both are going to change drastically by then and getting married now, you run the risk of being married to a completely different person within the next ten years. Think about what kind of life he can give you if you marry him now. Is that really what you want? Hold out for a better job and bigger ring ;-)
2007-07-20 04:42:59 · answer #5 · answered by Katie T 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
well to b honest this is what i think well 15 is pretty young and u never kno ow long things might last, yea if u get divorced u get 1/2 his **** but still, this is a big step, if u truly love him and want to b with him u need to think this over if its right or not, i broke a knuckle so theres prolly typos out the ***, im sry bout that, but anywways, u shood look deep inside and find out just how far u wood go for him, also u do need parental consent so unless u obtain permission u cant do it until 18. and also a relationship can end in an instant, u got to think deep, also u go to think how much married couples fight casue there married and things r more serious, look at my parents, wen they dated they did everything for eachother, now its rare to c them at the same house together >:{ also ppl insist on making small problems into big ones, u go to think this hard and long and once u find out wat u think is right then u shood understand if u can go trough with it or not, my advice is to do wats right, dont jump into marriage cause u 2 r having a nice relationship, that can change fast, u hav all ur life to get married, if u want to now and u think its right do it, if not wait, the time will come wen u decide its right then u can raise ur kids, hav a job and ur family to care for, and also make sure that u cook good breakfast, the way to a mans heart is through his stomach any way those r my thoughts!!!
i hope i helped :)
2007-07-20 05:35:35 · answer #6 · answered by John H 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To answer your question in one word "YES" 15 is way too young to get married. I know that is not the answer you wanted to hear but let's be honest here… your really still just a child if your honest with yourself. We all have different concepts of what love is, and your really still have a lot of growing up years ahead of you. You are really missing out on the true teenage years of life, and once they are gone you will never get them back. If you really truly think you love him and he loves you then you should wait till you are older. Feelings change ever so fast even when you're not looking for them to. Why rush into a marriage now and possibly kids and then feelings change. I think you really should wait and see how things go, take the time to enjoy this time of your life doing normal things teenagers do… and getting married in today's society is not something on the list. Best of luck to you, and remember to always be true to yourself and don’t let anyone talk you into to anything your not ready to do.
2007-07-20 04:46:53 · answer #7 · answered by Karen 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
First of all, if you live in the United States, it is illegal for him to be dating you. Secondly, if you are having sex with him and live in the U.S., that is called statutory rape and child molestation, which could land him in prison for many years. And thirdly, why would your parents AND his parents allow it!?! Yes you are too young. Ask yourself this..... Do I want to get married at 15, be a mother at 16 or 17, and spend the rest of my life bringing up babies AND a husband? You will be giving up your youth. It all sounds so great when you are young, but look at the big picture. Get an education, go to college. Experience LIFE before you settle down and start a family. You can't get these years back. Don't waste them, enjoy them. You only live once, you will never get a second shot at youth or childhood. We all grow up soon enough, don't miss out on what is suppose to be the best times of your life. There is a big world out there. Get an education and experience life to the fullest before you throw it all away.
2007-07-20 04:51:45 · answer #8 · answered by irish_indian_fantasy 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Marriage is a ceremony, commitment is for life. 15 is too young for marriage, even at 16 you need parental consent. Besides, a lot can change in a few years. Mentally, niether of you are mature enough to handle something as serious as marriage.
Wait until you're at least 18 before you make any decisions about a life partner. If he loves you like he says he does, he can wait.
2007-07-20 04:48:20 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I totally understand what you are talking about when you say, you do know what love is, but if you truly love him, you both can wait until you're 18. That way, for one thing you are considered an adult and you've graduated high school and have a better chance of not dropping out because you are pregnant or because you need to get a job because you need rent. This is another thing you should think about, if you guys can't pay for rent, food, transportation, or anything else you need, then you might not be ready.
2007-07-20 04:47:58 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Honey im18 and im getting married in 5 months. Im ok with it but marriage is forever.There is so much out there you havent learned yet. You might grow up and change into a mature person and your husband may not be the person you want to be with.Your 15 so you cant get married without your parents signature. But that is a huge situation you really need to think about this before you do it.
2007-07-20 04:46:12 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋