An ex pro sportman who is a few years older to me but had to stop playing sports because he had an accident and lost his athletic shape (but is not disabled)
He is kind of living in his glory days like wishing he could go back, very sweet but gets mad when ever his recent looks are being reminded.
A smoker and a drinker (not heavily though)
He was a heavy flirt before the accident (like most sportsmen), now he doesn't go out that much like he used to.
I mean he has so many bad qualities but I still have some feelings towards him? He's a good friend of mine. And he said that he has feelings towards me
What do you think I should do
2007-07-20 02:43:40 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Very protective of me
2007-07-20 02:47:36 · update #1
I know someone like that - nice guy too. Like him a whole lot and enjoy his company.
BUT in love with him? No. We're merely casual friends because he's too stuck in the past.
In Genesis, Lot's wife is turned into a pillar of salt because she kept looking back - when expressly told not to. Actually I think that's allegory for a dried-up sad, embittered old hag - but true or not - that's what your buddy has - Lot's Wife syndrome.
If you really feel for him, you could discuss the fact that the past is the past and he can remember it fondly, but not long to return. I mean, does he really want to return to the play on Sunday and throw up and pee blood all day Monday? And does he really yearn for the one-night stands when he has a wonderful loving woman in front of him who doesn't care that he's no longer Joe Sportsman?
This may take several discussions - and even a few fights - but that's his problem not yours.
OR you could just decide that he's too much of a fussy-child and find someone who isn't stuck in the past.
2007-07-20 02:51:29 · answer #1 · answered by Barbara B 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As long as he is not a drunk, abusive, selfish or inattentive becuz of his situation then what is the problem? Unless your feelings stem from feeling sorry for him. It seems all he needs is a little boost in confidence. He doesn't see himself as the alpha male he used to be. This is where majority of his problems stem from. I don't know if he is not able to workout anymore, but if he can have him go for walks or light jogs with you. You both can get in shape together while spending time with each other. Before I would get into anything serious with him, I would try to get his self esteem up. You don't want to get into a relationship where you will have to deal with his mood swings. If he is willing to change his life for the better then go ahead and let your feelings grow. But if he isn't then keep your feelings for him at a minimum. Good Luck sweetie!!
2007-07-20 03:02:41 · answer #2 · answered by handvict81 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Every man is eventually going to be an ex pro or non pro sportman. You have to decide if your feelings out weigh his bad qualities. We all have bad qualities and good qualities. If you enjoy being together, if he treats you with respect, if you can talk and laugh together and he's your friend, then you have more going for you than most people who think they are in love. Love grows.
2007-07-20 02:55:23 · answer #3 · answered by JAK 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You already know the answer to this, but if you need help...he doesn't take good care of himself. He's living in the past and it doesn't sound like he was a real nice person in his past. He sounds like a miserable human being who will only bring you down with him.
Maybe on his own he'll break out of his self-pity.
2007-07-20 02:51:19 · answer #4 · answered by J F 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Follow your heart. Haha! Corny..
2007-07-20 02:54:36 · answer #5 · answered by YAHOO ANSWERER 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
No, I don't know your age but he sounds like he's ending his life when your beginning yours. Don't do that to yourself. You deserve better.
2007-07-20 02:47:33 · answer #6 · answered by Ladybug 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him a try. He sounds pretty nice.
2007-07-20 02:46:36 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
Help him improve his life. Go for it.
2007-07-20 02:47:23 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 1⤋
He doesn't sound too bad.
2007-07-20 02:49:15 · answer #9 · answered by thesweetestthings24 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋