Does he want a relationship?

Question

We have been going out for almost a month now and he tells me how much he likes me and wants to be more than friends, but i think he is still seeing other women. We spend hours together and we have a great time. We talk everyday and he constantly tells me he misses me. If he's really interested would he still conversate with them or is he playing it safe by keeping them as "backups". I'm also still "talking" to someone else but if he's ready to start a relationship with me then the other guy is history. I'm confused....what does he want from me or is he playing games. We are supposed to spend the weekend together but I'm not too sure about it now

Answer 1

Show me a guy who "wants" a relationship and I'll show you a guy you might want to stay away from. When a guy says "I want us to be more than just friends...", that means he wants to do the horizontal hokey pokey with ya. Didn't you know that?

I gather from your question that you're way to young and immature to be involved in a serious relationship yet. I know that you THINK you are...all young girls do, for some strange reason...maybe because all their girlfriends are getting laid and they feel left out or something. But, there's plenty of time for "relationships" after you know what you're suppose to do with yourself. Just chill and enjoy your life. Be smart and safe.

Answer 2

It sounds like you are interested in finding a long-term, monogamous relationship and if that is the case, then you need to decide what it is that YOU want and know what it is that you have to offer to someone else. You need to be clear in your mind. You say you are having a great time and you keep in contact when you are not able to be together. In my opinion, that's a great start. You sound concerned that he is still talking with other women and when you question whether or not he is playing safe by keeping them as back-ups makes me wonder if you have some insecurity that you really don't need to have. I wonder if you have been hurt before and are afraid of being hurt again. Don't condemn a new man because of the actions of an ex. Give the new one a chance, and don't assume his conversations with other women are a sign that he is playing it safe and keeping them as back ups. If this man has just as great a time with you, keeps in contact with you and want to take it to the next level, did you ever think that he finds YOU to be amazing? Maybe he is contemplating ending these other relationships just as you are thinking of doing. Have some confidence in yourself that other people see the really good things in you and understand that's the reason they have fallen "in like" with you.

Answer 3

Since you're not in a official "committed" relationship with him, you're both free to see other people still. He might be hesitant about making a commitment. Do you know if he's been hurt by other women in the past or what his views of women are? I have a male friend who thinks all women are coniving b*&^hes. That's because he was hurt by most of the women he chose to get involved with.(His fault)

If I were you, I wouldn't have the "talk" about commitment with him, unless you want to be rid of him. One month of dating is too soon to have the "talk" or to commit to someone. Are you the type that always needs to be in a relationship? If so, you better get help fast. Hang out with him, don't be so readily accessible, date your butt off with others, but don't brag to him about it, definitely don't break plans with your friends to see him. If you haven't seen or spoken to him in a few day and he askes how or what you've been up to, let him know you've been doing great and having so much fun. It'll make sure he knows he's not the most important thing in your life. Hopefully you haven't given him that impression already. If you have, start doing the above things and you'll definitely get a different reaction.

Don't be worrying about a commitment, if it was meant to be, it'll be. I don't know how old you are, but life's too short to be worrying about having an exclusive relationship with someone. Enjoy and explore all your limitless possibilities and don't feel you need to be tied down to one person. Not being in a relationship is not the end of the world.

Remember this though, "If you're going to love, wear the glove"!

Answer 4

Unfortunately, men have that mechanism that keeps them from committing completely sometimes. He has those "backups" because he may think you are not totally interested in him. Here is what you do: Sit him down and tell him how you truly feel about him. Don't mince words, and at the same time, tell him how his other girls send the wrong message to you. Saying that along with your feelings will give him enough to gauge and make a decision. If he is smart and willing to take a chance (which is what a relationship is, is a risk), he hopefully will choose you and develop something meaningful and long lasting. Good luck!

Answer 5

I have quite similar experience as you. As a lady we are sensitive enough to know that our man is seeing other women. Let us not cheat ourselves, we have to face it. Are you confident abt the relationship? Would you want to be with a man who flirts around?

Come on, men would not mind to have as many girlfriends. My ex-boyfriend told me he loves me too, but when I found out that he is seeing other women, I really can't accept it. I know I can't be with a man who is unfaithful and take relationship lightly, this is not love. If he loves me, he would care about my feelings.

Though we have so many great times together but I dont feel secure. I know clearly that this is not what I want . We parted. I was very hurt and for the longest time in my life...I was not able to fall for any other man, it has already been more than a year and the hurt is still there. It is not easy but I know I have to make the right choice before I step deeper into the relationship. I don't want myself to be hurt fruther because I know this is a major problem in our relatonship. He can never be faithful to me.

An advice for you, you have to know what you want from a relationship. If you want just happiness and you can withstand him seeing other women, then this is not a problem. But if you cannot tolerate, then it's best that you get out of it now and not get yourself hurt further. Love yourself, I know it's difficult to make such decision but I felt we woman deserve a better man out there. Take care.

Answer 6

Go with him and spend the weekend together. Don't be insecure about this. You know he knows how you feel right? Just spend quality time together and let time work for you. Don't fall into insecurity, your better than that.

Answer 7

actually mostguys are like that they are funned of having backups in case that what they prefer didnt work out

but i belive if the guys really likes u he doesnt care at all or dont mind at all having backups because he is willing to risk everything for u

Answer 8

You guys both like each other, but at the same time you guys are talking to other people as well...

If you are really interested in him...then tell him how you feel and see where it goes from there...Be adults about your feelings and communicate

Answer 9

You need to talk with him about it. Unless you're in an exclusive relationship, I wouldn't be having sex with the guy. Don't be shy about this conversation - you deserve straight answers. If he says he doesn't know, than take that to mean that he's going out with other girls too. Until he knows, you're just dating.

Answer 10

to me both of y'all have interest in each other ,but the only thing is that y'all with other people .so just ask him the big question and what every he say . have it out from there.