Do you respect your child's father's girlfriend/wife?
What I mean is....are you happy that they love and care for your child?? or do you feel threatened at all by it??
2007-07-20 00:35:18 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
PLEASE be honest!
2007-07-20 00:35:52 · update #1
I'm on the other end of this, I am a step mom to a 6 year old girl. I have been with her dad for 4 years. She calls me mommy. She knows she has 2 mommies. Her dad and mom have joint, even though we have her more. Her mom absolutely HATES me. She's totally jealous of the relationship I have with her daughter. She refuses to talk to me and is rude to my fiancee when I'm around (like when we pick her up or drop her off) I hope eventually she will understand that I love her daughter like she is my own.
2007-07-20 01:05:01 · answer #1 · answered by Olivia's Mama 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I don't even know my ex's girlfriend or wife as the dad hasn't bothered to be involved in my children's lives.
IF they were, however, and the girlfriend or wife cared about my children, I'd be happy. Would make it less of a burden to worry about them if they were visiting their father. If I knew the female of that house cared about the welfare of my children, I'd feel more at ease. I think I would only be threatened if I happened to still want the man for some reason (which I don't) or if she acted like the better mother since I hate people who try to look down on others.
Otherwise, what would I care as long as my kids were safe and cared for?
2007-07-20 07:45:54 · answer #2 · answered by Top Alpha Wolf 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, My son's father is married to the woman he had a child with at 17, they broke up for a long time (8 years) and in that time he wasn't able to do much for that boy, when we got together we started taking his son every other weekend, and I did everything for him. When his mother said he needed clothes, I bought them. When she said she had no food in her fridge, I gave her a gift card to the grocery store! I made her son a part of my family in the three and a half years I was with this guy, then I get pregnant and tried to show her that we wouldn't forget about her son and she caused a scene at my baby shower (shouldn't have invited her i know) after 9 months of being parents together he ran off on me and married her, now she won't let him call, and she won't let him be a part of our son's life. I have absolutely no respect for her what so ever, and none for him either, because if he was any kind of man he would stand up and be a father no matter what she says.
2007-07-20 10:02:10 · answer #3 · answered by Jenn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
IMO any mother who says she's not at all threatened is lying. There will always be a small part of me that would rather snap a woman's neck than see her 'acting' my role in any form. That's terrible, yes. But at least I'm honest.
That being said, yes, I do respect the girlfriend, as much as I can. Her lifestyle, maturity level, and drug use are not within the standard of people I generally befriend, but she's kind to me & my daughter, so I give kindness right back. I respect her as a person, and for trying to be a good girlfriend, and for not trying to get involved in conversations about my daughter.
She does not care for my child, though. Their "extracurricular activities" have caused me to refuse to let my ex take my daughter anywhere without me. They can come see us, but my daughter's not going anywhere with them. For the most part, yes, I'm fine with the way that she treats my daughter. Except for the smoking in front of her, which makes me very angry.
2007-07-20 10:28:30 · answer #4 · answered by ~Biz~ 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Mom for over 27 years now. I have lots of children, natural, foster & adopted. I am also a single mom. I have never had a problem with insecurities with the other "moms". They all know who is raising these kids and I am doing a helluva fine job. I do have respect for them that they are able to tolerate those men though! LOL! Not what you wanted to hear, huh?
The other women vocally appreciate what I have done with the kids. So, more it's like they respect me. I appreciate the fact that they do love and care for the kids when they are around them. Otherwise they wouldn't be seeing them at all!
2007-07-20 07:41:33 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I am a stepmom to a 17 & 12 yr old. The first year my husband & I were together, his ex-wife was totally nasty to me. She eventually apologized to me & told me she was wrong to behave the way she did. We got along great for a few years. Now, once again, for no reason at all, she hates me. It's a roller coaster ride with her. It shouldn't bother me, but it does. She's turned the kids against me. We were once close. I would just like to say to all of the bio-moms reading this; I understand that you may be hurt that your relationship didn't work. I can understand that you don't want someone trying to take your place w/ the kids. Not all of us are like that. Think for a minute that maybe we genuinely love these kids & want to do right by them. Isn't it better that we all get along & the kids have one more person to love them?
2007-07-20 10:43:29 · answer #6 · answered by PrincessJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I like my ex's girlfriend. She seems to balance him out. At least, he has held a job since he's been with her. And he has been paying child support since they got together. They only see my daughter once every several months, so I have no reason to be threatened by her. I wouldn't anyway, though, as I am remarried and happy and I hope they will be very happy also.
2007-07-20 09:40:15 · answer #7 · answered by Lotus 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well since my first husband has had nothing to do with his kids since he kicked me and them out 10 yrs ago no not really. I have known his wife since 3rd grade and well they deserve each other. They are both cheating a$$es and well it works for them but it didn't work for me. So now I'm remarried and have a third and my first two don't even know they have a sperm donor. Hell he won't even work so he doesn't have to pay child support. But when I saw him 3 weeks ago he wouldn't say hi kiss my a$$ or even look at his kids.
I think each situation is as unique as the people involved in it.
2007-07-20 08:36:52 · answer #8 · answered by mlkcow2 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well my child lives more with my ex husband and his new wife. I am fine to her I say Hi and am totally nice to her but she is such a B@#$% to me. I have done nothing wrong to her my son or my ex. I have no idea what her problem is. The most important thing for me to do is never let my son know I don't care for her. I keep my emotions to myself. It's best that the children don't get inbetween and hear negative things about their parents they will resent you for it. I am very happy that they are doing a good job with my son and he seems to like her but her main problem is with me I guess she just doesn't like me because I was with HER man for 11 years lol whatever she needs to get over it we both are married now and need to move on.
2007-07-20 08:45:05 · answer #9 · answered by ON FIRE 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am a step-mom and honestly tried to get along with his ex BUT she felt threatened by my realtionship with her daughter, so we do not get along. We have my step-daughter 85% of the time because her mother has "other things" to do and chooses to put everything (work, men, drinking, going out, friends) in front of her daughter.
2007-07-20 08:54:51 · answer #10 · answered by To The Point 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋