My husband and I were invited to the wedding of an old friend (I haven't seen her in 5 years). The invitation is just made out to the 2 of us, even though the bride knows we have a baby. Does this mean the baby isn't invited? I don't trust babysitters yet (what can I say, he's my firstborn), so I'd have to figure something else out if he's not welcome. Is it rude to bring a baby to a wedding when it's not specified on the invitation? Thanks!
2007-07-19 14:16:22 · 38 answers · asked by newmommy 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Only the people listed on the invitation are invited. I'm sure there was a reason that she did not include your child - I did not include children on my invitations simply because I did not want them there. Rude or not, it is her wedding and although I'm sure she won't say anything if you take your baby with you, it is still considered more rude on your part than on her's for not inviting your child in the first place.
2007-07-19 14:30:31 · answer #1 · answered by Katherine 3 · 9⤊ 1⤋
Do not, under any circumstances, bring a 9 month old baby to the wedding.
It would be rude to bring anyone not included on the invitation, let alone an infant.
This is the bride's day, if she wanted to include your baby on the invite, she would have. It was not an oversight. This is a once in a lifetime event for the bride and groom. An adult affair, not for babies. Don't put her on the spot by asking if you can bring an infant to her wedding.
Now, before you label me a baby hater, I have two kids and a grandchild. I, too, was uncomfortable leaving my baby with a sitter, but when my sister in law got married, I found a trusted friend to stay with my 11 month old son so we could attend the wedding. Even though it was her nephew, my son was not included.
Make arrangements for a sitter so that you can enjoy the event.
You'll be gone only a few hours, the baby will be fine. And so will you!
2007-07-19 14:31:15 · answer #2 · answered by Army mom 5 · 11⤊ 0⤋
Wedding etiquette states that only the people on the invitation are invited. I would suggest calling your friend and checking with them to see if it is OK to bring the baby. It may have been an oversight or maybe they assumed you would get a babysitter, but if they truly do not want any kids at the wedding be prepared if they say no.
Is there any family that can babysit while you go and enjoy the wedding? If not maybe just go to the church and skip the reception.
2007-07-19 14:28:04 · answer #3 · answered by Reba 6 · 0⤊ 1⤋
If the baby is not mentioned on the invitation, then the baby is not invited. Why would you even want to bring a baby to a wedding? A child that young can't possibly enjoy the event, and is way too young to be expected to be quiet that long. He's going to get tired and cranky (nothing against your baby--any 9-month-old would) and everybody's going to know it. Most people don't enjoy the sound of a crying and fussy baby. Why would you subject the bride and groom and their guests to it? If you can't be away from your baby for five hours, then that is your issue. Don't make it anyone else's--stay home if you won't get a sitter.
2007-07-19 14:59:15 · answer #4 · answered by Trivial One 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
The baby is not invited! You don't bring someone to a wedding if their name is not on the invite. No offense but babies are never really welcome at a wedding. Most people don't allow children under 10 much less an infant. If you can't find someone to watch the baby then you shouldn't go. Trust me on this one. I'm sure the bride would be very upset if you showed up with your child.
2007-07-19 15:05:13 · answer #5 · answered by Luv2Answer 7 · 4⤊ 0⤋
yes it is rude to just bring your baby along with you. Let's face it babies can disrupt ceremonies, it is not their fault but many brides prefer not to have their day interrupted by some bored or misbehaving child.
Your son is 9 months old you must have someone that you trust to watch him for a few hours. If not find someone and have a trial run before the wedding. There is no reason not to leave the child in safe care you need to relax, first child or not, you and your baby are gonna have a much better go of things if you learn to relax and not to be too over protective. Don't hover, it is not good for children just as flowers do not grow well in shadow.
2007-07-19 15:48:18 · answer #6 · answered by CindyLu 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
If you have a 9 month old baby then it is high time that you should be able to leave your child with a sitter, whether its your first born or not. It would be extremely rude if you were just to bring the baby to the wedding and reception.
Definately ask the bride if they have any sitters available at the reception (although probably from what you have said your wouldnt be comfortable with that either). Dont just take him along. If it was my wedding, i would be pretty angry
2007-07-19 16:26:49 · answer #7 · answered by Suzieq 4 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Since it was not addressed to the Smith family you would need to ask the bride. All signs point to no baby but since he is under a year she might make an exception.
Just showing up with him without checking with her first though would be rude since she didn't technically invite the child. However, that could have been an oversight especially since you havn't seen her in years and she may not know the childs name or something.
Explain that you are not comfortable leaving him with a babysitter yet, just be prepared to decline the invite if she says no.
2007-07-19 14:21:47 · answer #8 · answered by pspoptart 6 · 3⤊ 2⤋
Maybe I am really rude - cuz I kow that the only people invited are those on the invitation. BUT - I am going to my cousin's wedding in 10 days. My son is 9 months old. His dad has to work, so he is staying behind. We don't have anyone who would watch our son while his dad works - he works third shift. So, when I travel, the baby comes with me. When I mentioned to my cousin that it'll just be me and the baby coming in to town cuz daddy has to work, she said she couldn't wait to see him (the baby). I'll probably try to see if someone on his dad's side of the family can come and pick him up at some point, but there are no guarantees. Luckily, he's a really well behaved baby, so I am hoping for the best. But I will sit in the back and remove him if he gets loud.
2007-07-19 15:53:41 · answer #9 · answered by Proud Momma 6 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If the baby's not on the invitation, the baby is not invited. It is absolutely rude to bring a baby to the wedding when not specified on the invitation.
P.S. from the weddingchannel.com:
"Q: Can You Ask If You May Bring A Date To The Wedding? Your Kids?
A. It is not appropriate to ask the couple or the hosts to let you bring extra people, even your children. If the exclusion of your kids creates such an inconvenience that you can not attend without them, simply send your regrets, saying that family matters prevents you from being able to attend. If you have unique circumstances that your hosts may not be aware of -- such as a child that is nursing, or a recent engagement -- you can politely inform the couple and see if they offer to make an exception."
2007-07-19 14:24:04 · answer #10 · answered by Ms. X 6 · 7⤊ 0⤋
Since the baby's name is NOT on the invitation, that means the baby is NOT invited.
It wouldn't hurt to ask the friend if a babysitter will be available. If she says no, then I would leave the baby with a relative or not go at all.
2007-07-19 15:24:37 · answer #11 · answered by janetrmi 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋