Parents would you be offended by this?

Question

My husband is the head coach of my sons youth hockey team. My son is the top line center and also the team captain. There's a boy on his team that has great skills but he lacks the confidence to do anything with it so my husband has been working with him at the rink for the last couple months(even though the season hasnt started yet). The boys father asked my husband if we had any of our sons old hockey equipment laying around and if he could borrow it for his son because they cant afford to buy him new. Now some of the other boys on the team know this and make fun of him, hence the lack of confidence. Well, the other day when they were leaving the rink the boy was crying to his father that he wants new stuff like all the rest of the boys.My husband told me he'd like to take him(with parents permission) and buy him all new equipment(stick, skates...) and he'd even pay for his jersey for the upcoming season. He's just worried the parents might take offense to it. Would it offend you?

jachooz, thanks for your answer but you couldn't be more wrong. Nowhere in my question did I say I or my husband or son told any of the other boys he was using used equipment. I dont know how they found out but it wasnt from any of us.
And as far as the teasing goes, my husband an assistant coaches do not tolerate it. They just cant stop it. They can try all they want to, but kids are kids so they are going to do it anyway.

Answer 1

I think it is a nice idea and the thought behind it is obviously in support of the child. I think whether or not the parents take offence to it depends on how your husband goes about it.
I would recommend he talk to the parents of the kid first and ask their permission and explain that he is suffering as a player due to his lack of confidence. They may prefer to accept the money and bring the kid to get the gear themselves, however there is also a chance that they will not accept the money out of pride or simply because they can get by without hand outs.
It is certainly a very nice gesture and I think once your husband speaks with them whatever their wish they will recognise that.Good luck

Answer 2

Depends on the people. Let your husband talk to the other dad and say how great the kid is, and he'd love to give the kid a 'gift' for all his hard work in the off-season. That way it's a gift for the kid, not charity for the parents. If your husband's respectful, the other dad should be cool. After all he was cool about the hand-me-down equipment.

Answer 3

yes, it would. My son is a goalie and has been in travel hockey for 9 years. The coach should not tolorate ANY teasing from the rest of the team - if anyone asks why he has someone else equipment you never should have told anyone else it was because they could not afford it. It was no one elses business. You should have just said it was because your son grew out of it and he is using it now. End of story. Your pity is making worse for this boy.
and if your husband is coach your son should not be captain. Give another child a chance. I bet the other kids think the only reason he is captain is because of your husband and that isn't fair to the rest of the team.

Answer 4

No I think its a good idea but I dont think your husband should be the one taking the other man's son shopping. If he wants to help out he should go ahead and buy the stuff and give it to the boy's father so he can give it to his son or take the father shopping so the father can pick out the stuff. The father needs to be the one giving the stuff to his son reguardless so he doesnt lose face with his son.

Answer 5

How do the other kids know his family couldnt afford it?that should have been kept between the adults.your son shouldnt be captain if your hubby is the coach.your husband needs to take care of the entire team.the others should not be allowed to tease that boy for any reason.if that boys father is okay with your family buying the new equipment for him it should be kept between the fathers and the other boys dad should be the one to give it to his son.

if my son needed sometihng and i couldnt afford it and someone offered to buy it i would accept...and pay them back somehow.talk to the boys dad in private.im sure he will understand and it will make his son very happy

Answer 6

That is so sweet of your husband. I'm not sure how I would feel since I'm not in that position. It just depends on the personality of the parents. How about going about it a different way, have him buy the new stuff and wrap it up nice and send it in the mail to him and don't say who it's from just put a card in it that says something like "thought you might need this". That would nice.

Answer 7

It doesn't matter what any one here thinks. Who matters is that boy and his parents. Your husband needs to ask this boy's father in private, away from ANY children before taking any of this into his own hands. That is the only true way to find out if he will be offended or not.

Answer 8

If it was for my child's well being than no not really. He is the coach and they are there to help the children. The father asked to use some old stuff so he might appreciate it.

Answer 9

Oh for goodness sake human beings have too plenty time on their palms in the event that they're worried approximately what octomom wore for Halloween. How ought to all and sundry be indignant by that? They sell costumes for toddler's like that at each flippin' save. in the event that they have been so undesirable, they does not sell them at wal mart... in certainty I very practically dressed my toddler up as a devil myself this twelve months. 2d, she is a nun, its in simple terms humorous.... no person may be elevating this variety of super stink approximately this if she weren't a action picture star now and that they weren't annoyed at her first of all.

Answer 10

No! Not it it was done in a very private way so the rest of the team would not find out. I would approach it as.......man kids can be cruel............I think your husband is an honorable guy and I wish more people were as giving!!