My fiance' and I have been dating for 6 months and just got engaged. We are going to get married next summer. She is 30 and I am 37. I do not want to be too old to enjoy/keep up with my kids. We both want 2 kids. Should we wait until we have been married for one year first, or should we have kids right away?
2007-07-19 11:14:15 · 12 answers · asked by BBoss 2 in Pregnancy & Parenting ➔ Parenting
I think the fact that you have to ask this question says you should wait. I can't stress to you enough how much having a child changes your life. It's a wonderful change, but a change nonetheless. Why not wait until you've been married for a year or two? You've only been dating for six months. You're about to make a major commitment (marriage) - give the two of you time together, to establish your relationship before you bring a child into the mix. Once you have a baby, everything else takes a back seat to that child. at least it should. You guys are still relatively young. My husband was 45 when we had our daughter & he's keeping up with her just fine! LOL.
Good luck to you both!
2007-07-19 13:41:19 · answer #1 · answered by PrincessJ 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think it makes any difference. my parents got married when i was 6!
As long as you both feel ready. Not trying to say you're old, but you're at the age I wanted to have kids. ( doesn't always happen that way.) by 30 most people are financial well off.
I fell pregnant when I was married 6 months.
2007-07-19 11:24:10 · answer #2 · answered by carmen1509s 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It depends on your relationship. If you are comfortable in your relationship theres nothing wrong with having children right away. But just because you wait awhile doesnt make a difference either. My parents had me when they had been married for 16 years, and got divorced when I was 4 lol. They had 2 other kids too I wasnt the only one. But it really depends on the relationship.
2007-07-19 11:24:42 · answer #3 · answered by justme 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since it takes 9 months to make a baby, you'll be waiting almost a year anyway, even if you do start trying right away.
Seriously, though, this is a question that can't be answered without knowing the stability of your relationship. Some couples can have babies right away with no ill effect. Others need time for their relationships to mature. Which one is yours?
2007-07-19 11:18:51 · answer #4 · answered by sparki777 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I personally think it takes some time to settle into the marriage and really get to know each other first. I think it wouldn't hurt to wait a bit longer until you both are settled, stable, and ready.
2007-07-19 11:23:15 · answer #5 · answered by Jenna S 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
It is your decision. I don't see a problem with trying to have kids right away but maybe you should start right away. Remember that it takes time to conceive. Take that into consideration when discussing when to have children.
2007-07-19 11:28:37 · answer #6 · answered by I ♥ Caydence 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wait until you have been married a year or two. Children put a cramp in your style. You need to see if you are both mature enough to handle the sacrifices it takes to raise children!
2007-07-19 11:23:27 · answer #7 · answered by oldknowitall 7 · 0⤊ 2⤋
If you both feel that you are ready for it and you both want it, then do it when you get married.
2007-07-19 11:33:12 · answer #8 · answered by Jenn 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It is really up to you. Are you ready to support it? Are you ready to give up your freedom and fun? Then sure, go ahead. Ya'll are just a little older anyways. (Please don't take the offensively.) You should both sit down and talk about it.
2007-07-19 11:17:42 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Absolutely wait another year or two. It is important that you are both comfortable and settled in your new roles as husband and wife before leaping into parenthood.
2007-07-19 11:23:34 · answer #10 · answered by flowerpot41 3 · 0⤊ 2⤋