I entered my fiances chatroom and she was chatting to another guy,she lives in asia and i came to england to help her financially and because i couldnt send £50 one time she texed and said "its OVER" and yesterday i caught her talking to some guy.I have been faithfull to her and still love her after 12 yrs.Money is nothing compared to loyalty....what do i do?
2007-07-19 09:55:32 · 21 answers · asked by white tiger 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
Hmmm - I would wonder if its worth forgiving really! Only because it all seems a bit odd with the money situation!
2007-07-19 10:00:15 · answer #1 · answered by Em x 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
My first question to you is....why did you enter your fiances' chatroom. Have you some reason to not feel as though she is totally trustworthy & you therefore felt the need to check her out?
I feel somehow that there's more to this than you're letting on. No-body after 12 yrs of being engaged to someone....suddenly decides to enter their chatroom (without their knowledge) & listen in on a conversation taking place if they're not looking to find something amiss.....has she given you reason in the past to not trust her? somethings got you going because you talk of trusting her again......there's no way your trust just goes' overnight like that without a damn good reason......chatting to another guy isn't reason enough to lose trust.
I think you've once again caught her chatting on-line to guys in an unacceptable way.....this isn't the first time is it? You also are as uneasy about her reaction to you not sending her the £50 as we are, that's why you've mentioned it here.
Inside all of us is an inbuilt alarm system, it warns us when somethings not quite right.....your's has been going off for quite a while I feel.....maybe it's about time you started to listen to it, because it won't shut up until you do.....
2007-07-19 18:00:26 · answer #2 · answered by Funky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
>>because i couldnt send £50 one time she texed and said "its OVER" and yesterday i caught her talking to some guy.<<
She declared the relationship over. Thus, she no longer needs to be faithful to you.
But dude, I think you've been scammed! You've been together 12 years and she dumps for not forking over £50? She was fine being together but not married for 12 years, as long as you were giving her money. The second you don't want to send her some, she dumps you via text message! I wouldn't be surprised if this woman has lots of long distance "fiances." Good riddance to this scam artist! And please don't be so gulliable next time.
2007-07-19 17:23:09 · answer #3 · answered by Ms. X 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
TWELVE years? And you're still just "engaged"???
Not saying what she did was right, but maybe she's just tired of waiting??? I dunno....
If she was ready to break it off over money maybe she's not really even worth fretting over all that much...I know it's difficult to consider after 12 yrs being invested...but a true good "worth while" relationship shouldn't BE thought of as an "investment".....and looking into the long run, you may be better off w/out the stress.....
good luck! I send my best wishes for you.... ; -)
2007-07-19 17:03:17 · answer #4 · answered by secret_oktober_girl 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sound like you left and gave her freedom to do what she likes! Now more then ever you are not around her and she sneak around to chat to a guy behind your back sounds like cheating! Or it depends the reason why? But what ever it is she did it behind your back, not good for someone who helps the other person who loves one and other, I don't think you should forgive her because she knows dam well you left to help her out and that's how you get paid that is a big no no.
2007-07-19 17:07:49 · answer #5 · answered by Daughter of a KIng 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your fiance chatting with a guy on the Internet is not nearly as disturbing as her wanting to break it off with you for 50 pounds! Seriously reconsider this relationship.
2007-07-23 14:27:04 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
well 12 years is a long time to give up everything.
if they were only chattin to eachother then i would forgive her.
well do u know wot the conversation was about they might be good friends and just needed to chat the guy might be needin someother womans advice coz he might have problems with his marriage..i would get to know the truth n facts before doin anything.. or if its just flirtin everybody's got to know they still got it if they ever need to go down that path but im sure she loves u and will never hurt u.. good luck!
2007-07-19 17:08:25 · answer #7 · answered by prettygal32002 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
dont! come on! youve come all this way with her, and you have helped her out a lot- unless she was talking very sentimentally with this guy, it should be nothing to worry about- the dogs not married yet! she might just have a couple barks she wants to let out before shes chained up! (not that she wouldnt want to be... sometimes its a good thing) jus think:
Is ____ the one I want to spend the rest of my life with?
If the answer is yes, (right away) then ask her that question:
Am I the one you want to spend the rest of your life with?
If you or her is hesitant, then don't go through with it. Split marriges are not good for kids, if you have any. I think since youve gotten this far, you should go through with it, and pray about it.
2007-07-19 17:03:49 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I think it was all said when you couldn't send the money. Either she is very spoiled or she is playing you for a sucker. Either way, I think you should consider the 12 years a loss and move on with your life. Sorry, but oh so true!
2007-07-19 17:04:12 · answer #9 · answered by CRAIG C 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As you entered her chatroom,to me you don't trust her anyway.All she wants to do is get money out of you and any other guy that she wants.Get rid of her,she is not the one for you.Find someone else that you can respect and trust and the same back to you.Good Luck
2007-07-20 18:17:19 · answer #10 · answered by shazbust 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋