who should be responcible my 8 yr old son was sleeping over at a friends house?

Question

the mother wanted him 2 sleep over he has been going to this kids house it is only just around the corner from mine he went over, i get a call from my friend accross the street saying my son was in trouble, the police put him in the back of there car, and trook his mugg shot apparently they threw rocks at another neigbors car,the mother was "in the house" i was not there so now he has 2 go to court who should have 2 pay for this? he son was telling him 2 do it, so should i have 2 pay???

Answer 1

Aint you da parent?

Answer 2

You being the parent are legally responsible for your sons actions. Here's what I would advise. You pay the person for repairs to the care WITHOUT going to court, then turn around and ask for payment from the other mother. If she doesn't pay up, you can try and sue her

And if you don't believe in spanking, now would be a good time to change your tune and paddle your son's hind end a little. Putting him in 5 minutes of time out, taking away a toy, whatever, won't be enough to make him not want to throw rocks at cars again.

Answer 3

No, but your son does. They will not care if someone else told him to do it so DON"T tell the judge that. Your son should have known better, This is of no fault of the other mother. These two boys know right from wrong, it was there choice and they need to be responsible. Because hes not yet 18 they can not may him pay, but they can make him do community service, and It sounds like he needs that. I don't think the fine can fall back on you as the parent but if it does, put your son to work until he pays it off.

Answer 4

You are his parent, and he did commit the "crime," so the responsibility is ultimately yours. Just because his friend told him to do it doesn't mean he had to do it. I'd be more concerned about my kid making bad choices because of peer pressure than having to pay for the damages, court costs, etc. I'd also make the kid work off the money, so that he is accepting responsibility for his actions. Better he learns now at 8 years old, than at 18, when it is on his permanent record. Also, next time, check out the house and parents at the house at which he will be staying. They may not watch their kids as closely as you and may not be teaching their children the same values.

Answer 5

well a mug shot would not be taken in the back of a police car it would be done in the police department. and while he was supposed to be supervised by this other adult......i believe by law since u are his mother u are responsible for the things he does.....i would sit ur son down and straighten him out and dont let him go over that kids house anymore. and if u have alot to pay then u could take her to small claims court and see if u can make her pay u back.

Answer 6

I'm sorry, but you are the parent. You are responsible for what your kid does. He should know better than to do something just becasue the other kids tell him to do it! Obviously, your son is not ready to be trusted outside your house. Make sure he knows that and don't let him have anymore sleepovers until he earns back your trust. Watch him like a hawk and make him work to pay you back for the damages (pretty extreme that you have to go to court, though.). Good luck!

Answer 7

You can sure tell who the liberals are by the answers!!
But did you not teach you son right from wrong! He needs to learn a lesson here NO game boy or ps2 and no tv and to pay ie rake leaves in the yard what ever else you can come with. Do the dishes EVERY NIGHT for the summer. Be a parent not a friend!!!!

Answer 8

Yes, your still legally and morally responsible. If your son had someone staying the night at your house and they did something illegal without you knowing(when he goes out to play are you always RIGHT THERE with him? My 2 oldest are 9 and 7 and I know I'm not always right there with them) Would you feel that it is your responsibility to pay for the whole damage and have all of it fall on your shoulders? It doesn't matter who told who to do it, who threw the first rock, etc. Your son is 8 years old and you need to teach him responsibility for his actions. He is old enough to know right from wrong and he had to know doing that was wrong. If he sees you bailing him out now and finding excuses as to why he's not equally responsible. He's going to keep doing things and they will get a lot worse as he gets older because he will know his mother is going to bail him out and excuse it. Trust me, my mother did it with 3 of my brothers starting at a young age and they all have been in and out of prison, 2 of which are in prison now. It makes you mad, but you need to be real harsh on him now(PUNNISH HIM-For a LONG time) and make him find some way to "pay you back". Make him do extra work around the house or something and work out a "pay" schedule. My mother always told me it's better for them to cry now then for you to cry later and I really believe that. Eventually your not going to be able to "help him out of situations" and starting now only hurts him more then it helps him.

Answer 9

Your son is 8 a minor, so I don't know what this is going to coast you dollar wise but, rather then sound like an 8 year old yourself by saying her son told my son to do it. I would work on knowing where your son is and what he is doing and teaching him right from wrong. When this kid told him to do it he should have gone home. You live around the corner right.
Also, how did the lady across the street know before you?

Answer 10

Even though your son was in the other mothers care, we are still responsible for our childrens actions...My mom always says, if I ask you to jump in front of a speeding 18 wheeler would you do it? Peer pressure has a big effect on kids, but in all reality, kids will be kids, but it mostly depends on how they are raised and if they don't listen to the little devil on their shoulder......but out of courtesy ,since your son was in her care she should at least offer to help or an apology!!! Also making him pay for his actions will make him a better person and make him think twice before doing it again!!!

Answer 11

Your son should pay. I know that this will untimately lead to you paying, but make him do chores to pay the fine, however long it will take. I do believe the lesson he will learn will be more valuable to you than whatever the amount of the ticket/damage is.

Blaming your son's behavior on his friend or his friend's mother is a great example of not taking responsibility for one's own actions. As much as the whole situation sucks, it is a wonderful learning opportunity for your son.