My boyfriend and I have been dating for about 6 mos - this is usually the time where I start to get insecure because I have a hard time making the transition to the comfort stage of the relationship. We have been super lovey-dovey up to this point, but now I find myself getting very anxious if I don't hear from him every day. I find myself wanting to say sweet things, not because I feel it at that moment, but because I want to hear him say it. I really want reassurance. We also have an odd schedule of seeing each other due to his jobs, so we see each 3-4 days in a row and then won't see each other for the same amount of time. This is all really heightened because I am a teacher who is off all summer and have a lot of time to think.
2007-07-18 16:10:18 · 9 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I know what you mean, but I think you realize that this could kill the relationship. You need to find something to keep you as busy as possible, and you need to force yourself to say things that you mean when you mean them (unless they are destructive, then keep them to yourself)
2007-07-18 16:13:50 · answer #1 · answered by mel s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
First of all, I'm not quite sure what your question was, but let me say that I was exactly the same way for a long time. I got scared, and started feeling insecure once we got past the lovey stage, and I honestly think it was just because I was insecure about a lot of things, but mainly about myself. I've never been a "tiny" girl, and was never really told that I was pretty or beautiful, so I never believed it, but things have definitely changed. My bf now is amazing, and he loves me for who I am. He tells me every day exactly what he thinks about me, and I just can't get enough of it. We've been dating for a little over a year, and we're still in the lovey stage. I'm not saying that the man you're with now isn't right for you, but if you're like I was, you need to find someone who will never stop loving you. I really think that you really need to love yourself before you can let anyone else do that.
2007-07-18 16:19:31 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why are you spoiling your life with negative thoughts. As a teacher you tell your students to be brave and face the world intelligently, and then you wallow in insecurities yourself.
Either you believe in your boyfriend or you dont. So you have to make up your mind yourself and be strong in how you feel about him. And you have to make sure you give him the space he needs and are not just calling him every moment.
Believe in him, in your commitment and keep yourself busy preparing for the time when you will meet him. Make something nice to eat, shop for the both of you, prepare yourself... in other words use your time constructively. You dont need someone to tell you, because what you want to avoid is clearly stated in your question itself ! You have a lot of time to 'think' so just don't think, do something too.
2007-07-18 16:20:17 · answer #3 · answered by datasprite 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Find something to do in your spare time to help get him off your mind because if you become obsessed with the whole I have to hear from him every day or see him every day it will make the relationship stale and either he will get sick of you or you will get sick of him I remember when I first got together with my bf we were like that then I started to hang with friends while he was at work and it just made him miss me more instead of him saying im being too "stick"
2007-07-18 16:14:22 · answer #4 · answered by ???.??LIFE'S THE PITS??.?.?? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Take it slow and talk more between the both of you so u can get an understanding of how things work and start telling him nice things he wants to hear too and then u will see that he says them too.
2007-07-18 16:16:53 · answer #5 · answered by In love! 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well i think that you should not worrie about it unless he spends 5-6 days with out calling or talking to you because then it would seam like his avoiding you. but i dont think you shoul worrie
2007-07-18 16:16:25 · answer #6 · answered by Melanie Q 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
the honey moon period is over ,
time to get into this ,or get out of it
why are your worried, it love right ?
he cant be around you 24 /7 can he? , text him ,call him ,but for god sake do it ,and keep your self sane,when your doing it
2007-07-18 16:16:08 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
stop worrying so much, you're driving yourself crazy
2007-07-18 16:15:27 · answer #8 · answered by Tartlettes 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Get counseling, you have issues.
2007-07-18 16:12:55 · answer #9 · answered by janicajayne 7 · 0⤊ 3⤋