I'm a college student and I have an issue at the place where I work. One of the cooks at the restaraunt I work at is a local and thought it would be funny to tell me to "get in the oven" when he first met me. The man knows I'm Jewish but I'm not sure if he understood how offensive something like that can be. Needless to say, I'm very uncomfortable working with him. I spoke with my manager, who told me that unfortunately I have to work with him until I get promoted. This can take as much as 6 months and I don't know how much longer I can work with this disgusting hick. Should I quit and find a different job?
2007-07-18 11:20:51 · 12 answers · asked by future_jewish_public_defender 4 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
When I was a student one of my 'friends' made a very racist remark which upset me a lot. I managed to stay calm but later that evening I went to see him, and explained, very nicely, how much he had hurt me; I pointed out that one of my relatives lost his entire family in a concentration camp and that it was nothing to joke about.
I think you could consider trying this approach. It may be that your colleague was just being foolish. If he's a decent person he will appreciate your honesty and he will think twice before ever making such a horrible 'joke' in the future.
BUT only you know what he's really like. If you feel that he knew what he was saying, and meant to cause you hurt, then don't discuss it with him. Instead, rise above it. If you like the work, apart from him, then why should you leave - you've done nothing wrong!
One thing I can tell you: sadly you may encounter this kind of thing again in the future, so you MUST develop a tactic for coping with it. It's very tough because frankly, my gut reaction is to want to kick anyone who says anything racist - be it about Jews, Blacks or any other group. But you'll find that most people are really decent and don't like hurting others.
Don't let it get you down too much; be proud to be Jewish - that's the best response!
2007-07-18 11:53:58 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
You never said how long ago it was that cook said the oven thing. If its been awhile I bet that he didn't mean it in the way you took it, He might have just been funning around(like he would with anyone)and was a little ignorant of the jewish holocaust.
It is up to you to forgive him and follow the commandment "Love your neighbor". I think you are just trying to find some reason to be hateful. People are way too busy to make trouble because of someones religion.
Quit your job if you want but I think you should stay. Things usually aren't what they seem and you may find a really good friend in that cook.
I hope you don't think I am prejudiced against Jews. Your faith is the founding faith, what I believe in as a Christian came from that so I wholeheartedly respect Jewish people.
2007-07-18 18:44:58 · answer #2 · answered by julie 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I wouldn't quit unless I had another job.
People like that aren't worth getting to know or having things nicly explained either. By 'getting to know' I meant being in the near area of and conversing even through work.
Find another job if he bothers you too much, thats what I'd do, but I wouldn't quit first.
But think, once YOU get promoted (if you keep the job), and he is down below you......isn't that a nice thought.
Just my opinion.
2007-07-18 18:31:39 · answer #3 · answered by take me to your leader 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Think about it, it was a bad joke, but a joke. Probably the guy didn't stop to think how much that joke offended of hurt you and I bet it was not his intention. Don't feel so bad about it, it's probably nothing. Change your attitude towards him and give him a chance, it's probably a nice guy that just don't know how to be funny. Don't quit your job over something that probably was not intended to hurt you!
2007-07-18 18:42:56 · answer #4 · answered by Millie 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I have to agree with Marianne.
It's the work place. Everybody talks about everyone else. Believe me, I'm sure the other employees have plenty to say about the cook that insulted you.
2007-07-18 18:29:24 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
If this man is offensive to you and your beliefs, then find another job. Your manager is being unreasonable. You shouldn't have to deal with prejudice in the workplace.
2007-07-18 18:31:38 · answer #6 · answered by Zeorus 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
If the guy does this or similar again contact ADL(Anti Defamation League of Bnai Brith). You have legal protections in the workplace.
2007-07-18 18:30:12 · answer #7 · answered by James O 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
If it bothers you that much and your manager is that insensitive, it might be a good idea. And file a complaint with the EEOC on your way out, too, since they created a hostile work environment for you.
2007-07-18 18:26:40 · answer #8 · answered by Cathy 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Sorry about the trouble. Never quit a job until you have a better one lined up though as you will shoot yourself in the foot.
2007-07-18 18:28:23 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Threaten to press charges... lol.. Just kidding..
Reference the source.. See that person as the ignorant a$$ that they are and tell everyone that works there what he said.. Sympathy points for you and a$$h01e points for him.. Chics dig the persecuted victim..
2007-07-18 18:27:23 · answer #10 · answered by Furibundus 6 · 1⤊ 2⤋