there is this guy that i have liked for sooooo long that i work with. We work in an office building and he is our building maintenance man. We have known eachother for a year now and about a month ago we hung out for the first time outside the office. we were drinking and one thing led to another. we were drunk but we both knew what was going on. the next day we talked about it and he said hes not ready for a relationship, not with me, just not at all. he still talks to me all the time and things are like they were before, sorta. i asked him what he wanted and he said to be friends, not just office buddies. we haven't hung out since, but i still like him a whole lot. he's been burned by a lot of people, especially women in his life. do i accept the "just friends" and move on, or do i continue to feel the way i do? I know we're perfect for each other... will he ever think so? should i wait? please help my friends are tired of hearing about it :)
2007-07-18 09:04:30 · 13 answers · asked by kristen 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I did the same thing as you recently and I regret it. You need to move on, just as I am trying to. If it meant anything to him at all, he wouldn't be going with the "let's just be friends" and "I don't want a commitment, or any kind of relationship right now" bs. The guy that I made my mistake with fed me that crap and the next day he was planning a trip to go see some other chick about 20 states away. For a guy who doesn't want any kind of relationship, he's sure willing to travel a long way to "not have one". You should just try and move on. I know that it's easier said than done and it's that much harder when you are faced with that person day in and day out, but you need to find a way to distract yourself and let go, as I have so desperately been trying to do myself. When you find a really workable way to get over this guy- please email me and share how you did it! Thanks a bunch and good luck to you and don't worry... you'll find that guy that's worth your while.
2007-07-18 09:41:00 · answer #1 · answered by ? 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ok... He said he wants to be friends and not just office buddies? If I read that correctly then it seems like a step in the right direction. Since he has been burned by alot of women then maybe it's just way of keeping his guard up. Be his friend. One can never have too many friends. It also keeps you a step closer to where you would like to be. Maybe he will become more comfortable with you and come to see that you aren't like all "those" women. Or, maybe the feelings you have right now will fade and you will be happy with "just friends".
Either way. Ask him out again, as friends. Something casual, with other friends too so there's no weird feeling. He may warm up...
Good luck
2007-07-18 16:13:14 · answer #2 · answered by Just Me 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you like him a lot, let nothing stop you. He's afraid of a relationship because of what may have happened in the past. If you want to be with him, dont accept the just friends. Go after him if you love him.
P.S. I dont know a whole lot about your situation bc im only 13 but good luck.
2007-07-18 16:08:57 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Haha... well, maybe you should move on, but still have him in mind. Like, if he were to ask you out, then don't be like "Sorry, no, I moved on". lol
Or maybe you just think you're in love, and you think you're totally meant for each other, but later you'll realize how wrong you were (I do this a lot). If you guys were really meant for each other, it'll all work out.
2007-07-18 16:09:08 · answer #4 · answered by Emma A. 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I say you accept "just friends" and don't push it further. Definitely don't discount other opportunities because you are "waiting" for him. If it happens, it happens, and all the better. But if not, you need to move on with your life. Good luck.
2007-07-18 16:08:37 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
IF u r perfect for each other wait for him to realize it too. And accept being friends because u never know when this friendship transforms into something else.........
2007-07-18 16:13:22 · answer #6 · answered by goddess_of_fame 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Move on, life is to short to wait around for someone else to figure out what they want out of life.
2007-07-18 16:08:29 · answer #7 · answered by beenontheotherside 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Go for it and have a good time,and see how it works out.
2007-07-18 16:09:07 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I really dont want to break your heart, but the thrill of the chase is over, and he doesnt want a commitment. I would be more careful about who you become intimate with in the future.
2007-07-18 16:07:26 · answer #9 · answered by Marie Catherine 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
i think he was nice by saying he just wanted to be friends...not to be rude but maybe he had no intention of sleeping with you ....but then in that situation both of you did. you know how you felt about him before that if he had these thoughts afterwords he should of stopped it before it went where it went.
2007-07-18 16:09:14 · answer #10 · answered by GA 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋