I want to know if i shoulld leave my boyfriend?
My boyfriend and i have know each other for five years we have lived together for four years. i am in love with him and until a couple of days ago i thought he loved me. last sunday was my 21st b day. he promised me he would take me out to dinner. well he left at 2 a.m. to go with his frends to work. he didn't call me at all until 9p.m and i accidently said i didn't care and hung up with clarifying what i didn't care about. the next morning after i get home the first thing he says to me is you can live here as long as you like but i just want to be friends. and he tells me he has been seeing a friend for about two days. and that he wants to date her longer. then he asks me if his relationship with her doesn't work out can he come back to me. and that he needs time to think about us and his feelings.right now he is i guess out with her and hasn't been home since 2pm yesterday he says he still loves me please help me i am hurt and torn in2
2007-07-18 08:43:44 · 12 answers · asked by genah18 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
This is a difficult one,but his treated you really bad.He can't love you.I'm sorry,but he can't just come back to you if it doesn't work out with this other girl.Try and be strong and tell him that there's no way he can just treat you as a reserve girlfriend.I think you should cut your loss.You deserve much better.Your 21st shouldn't of been a great day for you and it sounds like it wasn't.
I don't think you should leave your home either.He's the one in the wrong he should go.Good luck with what ever you decide to do.But my advice is dump him for good.
2007-07-18 08:50:33 · answer #1 · answered by Jellytaz 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes, absolutely leave him!! You are just being used. How can he even say something like "if that relationship won't work I'll come back to you." That's basically saying that you are in the second place and after he gets bored with whoever else, he will come back to you because he has you and he doesn't need to worry. That's terrible. You should make him jealous and want you badly. His feelings are mixed and he doesn't know who he loves. He loves you, but is probably inexperienced with life and wants to try other girls. He wants to test out the waters and will later on know that if he gets into a fight with you, he will leave and always take advantage of you letting him be with other girls. Or maybe later he will value what a truly remarkable and beautiful person you are. I don't know his so it's up to you to figure out how he might react.
Best of luck:)
2007-07-18 09:00:09 · answer #2 · answered by Diamond 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
well it sounds like he wants his cake and eat it 2. by keeping you on the side he can do as he pleases and still come home to you. honestly I think he's asking permission to sleep with his new friend. but this is where you have to consider a couple of things, if you willing to put up with this crap now he will attempt to do it again; being friends is okay but make sure it's friends and NOT friends with benefits; also i hope even though you were in this relationship you still put a little dough aside for a rainy day because he may put you in a situation where you may need to lay your head some place else if not start saving that dough ASAP because you don't want to feel obligated to put up with his sh*t because you have no place to go and this maybe where he think he has you because it's easy to give in when you guys are in each other face 24/7.If you decide to stay & be friends keep busy to keep your mind off him and try not to tourment yourself by staying at home get out & have fun. hope everything works out
2007-07-18 09:03:06 · answer #3 · answered by chuckles 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
let me stretch ..............this is a good one so here is my opinion.....
If you see himas your only one...and he says he needs to date another girl you should break up....NO you should not let him come back to you, unless you go out and have some of your own NEW memories.....
he just doesn't know what he wants and i think every girl knows what they want and well i don't know one girl that wants a guy that doesn't know what he needs in life!!
in even shorter answer
he is not the one cuz your 21st is a very important date in your life that you wanna tell your kids how you had a blast back in the day...but now your story will be my boyfriend stood me up for another girl or whatever he was doin...then told me he liked someone else...and yea i stayed with him thinkin it was true love
you don't want that kind of story
new story
i got dumped on my 21st so the next week i went out and partied like a rock star!!!! never talked to that a hole again...yea i still liked him but no guy that was really in love with me would have done something like that after 5 years of knowing each other
this may not be want you wanna hear but i hope it helps give you some different views
2007-07-18 09:01:22 · answer #4 · answered by Sergio j 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Look this is what you do. Get rid of him and get a real man. One that wont up and screw someone ealse on a wim. You sound like a great person. He sounds like a peice of s*** sorry. If there is someone who you are attracted to. Bring him home. This will piss him off and he will learn his lesson. I know its hard because you have been with him for a long time but when you really think about it its about being comfertible with someone. You could do better. And ask him if its ok for you to go get some strange and if it doesnt work out for you will he take you back.
2007-07-18 08:58:30 · answer #5 · answered by J22401 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
What a jerk! The 1st thing I, or anybody will suggest is to move out from that place. If you cant afford to pay for an apartment, then rent a room from a friend or family member. If he wants to date another person and still tells you to wait for him if it doenst work out, it means he still needs to mature. 5 yrs is a looong time to know what he wants. If hes confused and needs time, give it to him. But give it to him once you move out. It will hurt you if you dont move out and hes dating other girls. Give yourself time as well. It will be impossible to know what you want if you are living with him. You will continue to hurt yourself by doing so.
He will eventually find out that "You never know what you have until its gone"..You deserve a better person who will love and respect you! Besides, your 21 and life is full of surprises.
Wish you the best and hope things work out with you = )
2007-07-18 08:56:45 · answer #6 · answered by Latina4life 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear, it he doesn't love you. It would be rude saying this but i think he is cheat. This is clear from the fact that he is askin if he can come back to you after he dumps that female. .....or rather she dumps him. He is playing safe games. Open ur eyes. Move out of that place and find a new life for urself. Spend time with closest of ur friends. Time will heal u surely. May God bless you !
2007-07-18 08:53:39 · answer #7 · answered by goddess_of_fame 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Don't facilitate this loser! He's cheating on you and devaluing you. He not only starts dating another girl, but he doesn't bother to tell you, on your birthday? That's not right. You deserve better, both as a human being and especially as his (ex) girlfriend.
I'd get out of there asap. Don't take him back and don't bother remaining friends. He is treating you like trash, and you deserve better.
2007-07-18 08:51:00 · answer #8 · answered by queenofnumenor 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sounds to me like he wants his cake and eat it to, you dont deserve to be treated that way, relationships are ment for two, not three, you shouldnt share him with another women. If he is young like you than maybe he just needs to get out there and sow his oats, but then again if he loves you I dont think it would matter the age he would be yours and only your man!
2007-07-18 08:50:38 · answer #9 · answered by KyGirl25 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You should leave him. This does not sound like it is a good relationship anymore. Don't wait around to see if he likes this other girl better than you. It will hurt, but you need to get out.
2007-07-18 08:48:46 · answer #10 · answered by Alli 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋