my boyfreind says i should wake up and try different things in the bedroom but Rape i mean this is not sex is it? he wants me to let him hit me and pull my hair and scream help ect is this normal? or yeah and he wants me to try to fight back so he has to hold me down. please help what do i do let him or what?
2007-07-18 08:34:25 · 47 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
ur guy is sick
2007-07-18 08:37:34 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 3⤋
Some people have fantasies like this. Some people have fantasies about being raped, too. For the most part, they're only that: fantasy. The people involved would be horrified by the real commission of such a crime, but pretending plays into a sort of dominance/submission fantasy that a number of normal adults have. Unfortunately, it's hard to explain to a partner without coming across as a pervert.
If you really don't feel comfortable with this, then let your boyfriend know, and don't let him pressure to do sometihng you don't want to. His desire to do this doesn't necessarily mean he's a bad person (unless he has some violent tendencies that you've noticed elsewhere), it may just be a kink you don't share. You could try it but tell him to go slowly until you get more comfortable and might find out you enjoy playacting, too. But don't immediately yell at him for being a freak, that may just make him reluctant to ever share desires with you again.
However, if that's one of his big turn-ons and it mortifies you, then this could cause problems in the relationship if you're unable to communicate or compromise.
2007-07-18 08:46:51 · answer #2 · answered by Ahni 4 · 3⤊ 0⤋
I think a rape fantasy is semi-normal, but it would have to be done with someone that you rrrreeeeaaaallllyyyy trust. It's not that he's actually going to rape you--he'd hopefully make sure you were wet before he went inside so as not to really hurt you. You two would have to institute a code word for "That hurts" or "That's enough" because when you're struggling and telling him to stop, he might think that's just part of the act.
I personally like a little bit of the rough stuff, but not at all times and I know it's not for everyone. Do only what you feel comfortable with. Start off slowly if you're not sure--like with a spanking or a little bit of hair pulling. Let him know when it's just too hard and when it feels alright.
2007-07-18 08:39:49 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋
I can certainly see role playing in a safe manner but the part about hitting you is out of control. Is he violent with you any other time? If you have a good relationship, talk to him about this. It obviously worries you and nobody should ever do anything that is not agreed upon by both parties. A light spankin, even a little tug on the hair is totally different that clim*xin with a black eye!!!! Be careful!
2007-07-18 08:49:00 · answer #4 · answered by Waterwitch E 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
From the tone of your message, it is obvious you are not into this sort of thing...NEVER let your man do anything in the bedroom with you that you are not comfortable with....It will only hurt your psyche in the long run, and make your sexuality more difficult for you to identify with....
Me personally, I would be deeply concerned about a man who wanted to do this sort of thing with me. Sex is such a beautiful and fun thing, and you can do all kinds of things with a great deal of passion and eroticism, to me there is no need to ever bring violence into the bedroom because there are just too many good things to do that feel much better..:)
But, I know some people are into all different things, what matters is what YOU are into. If you are not into this whole violent scenario, then I'd tell him to go screw himself and his twisted fantasies.
2007-07-18 08:39:14 · answer #5 · answered by Bruja 6 · 5⤊ 0⤋
I think the hitting part is a tad extreme otherwise, I think he just wants to act out a fantasy he has.
Alot of people have these types of fantasies however, I would be concerned about the violent side of it.
If you're not comfortable with acting out a rape fantasy, be upfront and completely honest with him....if you are thinking of trying it, make sure you have a safe word and make absolute sure he knows and understands that when you use it, he is to stop immediately!
2007-07-18 08:41:18 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
well tell him he cant hit you, But i treid the rape thing before and it turned me on. As long as its not taken to far no harm could come of it. PLus you can bite and punch him and tell him to get the **** off of you. It just makes him feel stronger and more dominant. Just watch out for those kind of guys. You need someone who is willing to be your equal not someone who wants to be in charge. There is a big difference between just sexy rape, and actually wanting to rape you. But you cant rape the willing sweety
2007-07-18 08:40:16 · answer #7 · answered by Andrea B 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
What he meant is a game.The rape game. My wife play the game with me and I love it.Is different.The joy is awesome and the reason is your senses are slipping and when the thing take place you wake-up and start to feel the placer running in your blood.The game is awesome.Some morals can say is disgusting,but I don't care about those losers.
2007-07-18 08:40:59 · answer #8 · answered by Mario Vinny D 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋
Wanting to rape someone is not normal. Your boyfriend needs some serious mental health help. You would do best to get rid of him and find someone else.
2007-07-18 08:45:28 · answer #9 · answered by missmuffin 5 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Okay.... IF he wants to rape you something is wrong with him...... I understand that some people like to have freaky sex which is normal but RAPE.... I don't think so.... not unless you like that kind of things????? But if you don't he need to get help and you need to get out of that relationship before he really hurts you and Rape's you..... Remember that if it does happen that something that you are going to have to live with for the rest of your life is it really worth it....
Good luck
2007-07-18 08:40:14 · answer #10 · answered by Nena 2 · 0⤊ 2⤋
it sounds like he is doing the most by that i mean getting out of hand...if you think it would make you feel uncomfortable then dont do it...just because he is your man doesnt mean your obligated to do things with him...and your right thats not sex..its not even kinky...its wrong all around...why would he want to feel like he raped someone...ask him that...
2007-07-18 08:40:36 · answer #11 · answered by acarisg 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋