whats the point in trying to get well and achieve my ambitions in life when you feel like people reject you?

Question

and treat you different anyway? because no matter what i do or what efforts i try to make, i will always be treated different and rejected by people when i try to conform and live a normal life. thats the way i feel now......i feel people looking at me, watching me , observing me, i feel im being prevented from achieving things with my life. ive never had a relashionship with girl or made a single friend in life. im now 30.
i dont even want to stay in the uk, i want to emigrate far away, build a new life..but how can i? when im being rejected, treated different, and possibly being prevented from achieving the things i want like a loving partner, moving from the uk.....something, someones standing in my path. & borderline personality disorder will make life ten times harder for me, plus its difficult to treat. & ive already endured a lifetime of pain, trauma, abuse, victimization and bullying. plus to top things, im being rejected & treated differently by people & when i confront them,

they just deny it anyway.......i love the mentality of people, the way that if you have problems, people seem to unite against you, ridicule, work against me....the invisable people you cant see in 'the system'....people in society.....(teeth clenched) cowardly ********!

its like my mentality is
' i will fight you, until you accept me ''~
jaw clenched so tight my teeth hurt

Answer 1

you seem to be very paranoid about people, and seem to be quite unfair. I suffered abuse and trauma too and i had to change the way i looked at ohters and learn to trust htem and give them a chance as i found i was very very hard on others. i have many many friends and am completely cured now but it took years. i know you've suffered but you have to decide NOT to be a victim anymore. i don't think moving away will necessary help you. you say you're rejected when you confront people, how are you confronting them then? when i was at my illest I was never rejected by people when I confronted them.
i am NOT being mean as i understand you're hurting, but it really sounds like you need to be a little kinder and deal with some of your anger towards the world as well. just think about it at least.
you may think the world owes you, but it doesnt agree, so you need to decide not to be a victim and start taking small postive steps to deal with your feelings, and to to have a friend you need to be a friend too. good luck

You are still young so you have time on your side to work through these feelings and have a good life. don't give up.

Answer 2

At the end of the day the only person that you have to justify yourself to is yourself. Lets turn your question around to fit into this. Why do I let the feeling that people reject me get in the way of letting myself chase my dreams and ambitions? People can do very special things in your life, but you are the centre of that. Try to stop living on the outside and put yourself in control. Running away will not help you. Your problems will still be there as they are your problems, your interpretation of how much you think the world is against you. A change of scenery and some sunshine won't change that. Small steps, big achievement.

Answer 3

Have you been diagnosised as a Borderline Personality? Are you seeing a competent psychiatrist or a clinical social worker?

Get into/stay in therapy and explore various medications options with your healthcare provider.

I doubt that living in the UK has a lot to do with your issues. I think that if you moved to America or to another European country things would not change and you'd be in culture shock to boot.

I think that you should read up on Borderline Personality Disorder and take a hard look at how this might be affecting your views on life, love etc.

Good luck! All the best!

Answer 4

I do hope you are getting some counselling. You have severe paranoia. Not everyone is watching you and observing you all the time. They just wouldn't have the time to do it. You need to stop taking the part of the victim, because that makes it ok in your mind for the world to be "against" you.
Moving away will not change your behavior and your way of thinking. I am sure everyone is not against you achieving your goals.
Really pay attention how you approach other people. Personality disorder can be treated very successfully.

Answer 5

OK. So you've been diagnozed with a border line personality disorder.

Moving somewhere else, will not get you away from yourself.

No one but you is stopping you from doing what you want.

If you care about what people think, then you may have to stop looking inwards and start observing what people react positively to and what they react negatively to.

Find something you really enjoy doing and immerse yourself in it. Being engaged and enthused is attractive to people, and you will be so absorbed you won't have time to notice that someone is,or isn't looking at you somehow.

Happiness is the essence of life. You alone are responsible for your happiness. Take responsibility and enjoy your life. Good luck and all the very, very best. You deserve it.

Answer 6

you seem paranoid about what other people think of you but everyone should have the right to be treated respectfully but hardly anyone is, some people have it worse than others for different reasons and im guessing you are one of the worse cases. I don't know you so I don't know why people treat you badly, just try to change yourself where you think there is room for improvement whether it's your personality or looks. People should respect you for who you are as a person and if they don't they aren't for you, not everyone is the same, there are still quite a few decent, kind people out there. Don't give up on your dreams and aspirations just keep trying and try to forget about what people might think about you, you can't let it stop you from getting on with your life. Keep positive and keep trying! good luck :)

Answer 7

If everyone had this point of view. There would be very few, if any, things accomplished in life. Why do you care so much what others think? The only real person holding you back or stopping you..., IS YOU. When people talk negatively to me, or say I am not capable of doing something. I get a determination to prove them wrong. You need to do this too. That is if you really want all of these dreams of yours to come true. I suggest healing books and inspirational stories. The best way to defeat these people is to prove them wrong and live your life according to your own standards. This may be hard or extremely difficult. However, it is not impossible. GL

Answer 8

Be patient and persistent. Keep dealing with your disorder the best you can. Set a goal, like finding a friend. You may have to go study some book on friendship..."The Friendship Factor" comes to mind, if you can find it. Point is, if it doesn't come naturally to you, do whatever it takes to figure it out. If you can only make friends with people who understand the challenges of a mental illness, make friends with THEM. People are always uncomfortable with what is unfamiliar to them, but it isn't impossible to forge a path to specific successes. Take babysteps. You need to love yourself.
Go to www.flylady.net for some tlc and some routines that may seem meaningless to you, but are secret weapons for happiness. You have learned a lot in these 30 years. You've learned what doesn't work. Now you don't have to keep banging your head doing what doesn't work anymore. Like confronting people instead of moving on. Think of people as potential customers. Out of 100, maybe 10 will open the door to you. Of those, maybe 5 will be sort of interested. Of those, 2 might do the trick, but only 1 really buys the product. Or think of people like shoes at a shoe store. If a pair of shoes doesn't fit, you don't spend time moaning about it and trying to make them fit. You try on a new pair. Same with people. Maybe with your disorder, you've got a smaller pool of people to be friends with, just like I have big feet and can only shop in 2 or 3 stores in my city. That's ok! Try something new until you find something that DOES work. When it becomes ok (to you) for you to be different, you will be ready to FLY. And once you get friendship down, you have the foundations for a proper girlfriend. You've got to give up the whining, though, as hard as it may seem, and you've got to let go of caring about all the "wrong shoes" that reject you. Be the best "you" that you can be, with integrity and without whining. You are a worthwhile person.

Answer 9

The more you focus on how others feel about you the worse it will be. Your giving them the opportunity "the kick them when there down thing". I lived feeling the way you do for 10 years and then i started seeing a doctor. it was me not other people. Go get help, and I mean that in the kindess way.

Answer 10

I felt like that a lot.

I was a very unpopular child and I was harassed by bullies. Most teachers didn't seem to like me very much either.

When I became an adult, it didn't get much better.

But I stick to my depression medication and I do my best to do a good job in every thing I do. If somebody chooses to not respect me, they can jump in the lake for all I care.