My boyfriend and I are looking for a new apartment together and his older sister wants to come live with us after we find one. Their dad is moving to another state and she does not want to go so she figured she'd move in with her brother. I did not ask how long she would be staying, but I have a gut feeling it would be permanently.
I do not want to live with his sister because she smokes weed, is bipolar, loud, lazy, and she manipulates her brother for money. A month ago, she called my cell phone and demanded that I let her live with us. She said that she was my boyfriend's sister for life and that blood is thicker than water.
The last time we visited his family, she kept knocking on our door while we were trying to be intimate and bothering us with stupid requests. She needed my boyfriend to come get her cell phone back from this guy she was dating because he stole it while in a drunken stupor.
My boyfriend doesn't mind if she lives with us, but I don't want her to. Help!
2007-07-18 07:03:09 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
She called again yesterday with the same sob story. She told my boyfriend that I was selfish, spoiled, etc. etc. She said she doesn't want to move out of the house her mother died in and wants the 3 of us to live in that house together.
Also, she added that their father was on her side and he is upset that my boyfriend won't let her live with us. Their dad was hoping that the 3 of us could work out some kind of arrangement.
My boyfriend is upset but he told me that he is going to listen to my concerns and side with me.
2007-07-18 07:44:20 · update #1
I asked her if she had any friends that she could room with and her response was "he's my brother and I can live with him if I want to. Why can't I live with him?We're family and you can't break us apart. Your opinion doesn't matter and he will side with me because I am his sister." It's like she is obsessed with my boyfriend and is is driving me nuts! I wish she would get a life. She is 22 years old and should be able to take care of herself.
2007-07-18 07:49:25 · update #2
I would talk with your boyfriend and see if he respects your wish. You two could be a lifetime partner and your boyfriend needs to learn to respect you. Especially that his sister seems like she is barging in and trying to keep her grip on your boyfriend...and why shouldn't she? He is letting her! She also has some personal issues that will cause a lot of problems with you and your relationship. She already is causing problems and she's not even living with you...yet.
I would stand firmly on not letting her move in. She needs to learn to stand on her own two feet and your boyfriend is not helping by giving in.
2007-07-18 07:12:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
UH, lay the law down NOW!!!
A man and woman just startiing to live together do NOT need another person in the mix.
Blood is thicker than water?? What the **** does that mean. Not many married people or people living together have other family members hanging around.
2007-07-18 07:14:00 · answer #2 · answered by zanthus 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I think that you should be honest with your boyfriend and tell him how you feel. Don't get into a fight about it, just be calm and give good examples as to why you don't want her there. Your going to be living there too so you should be comfortable in your own home. It sounds like if she does move in your relationship is going to untimaley fail beucase of her. Blood is thicker than water, but everyone needs to live there own life. She should find a place of her own or move in with a friend.Since she is older, she should be able to afford her own place.
2007-07-18 07:12:29 · answer #3 · answered by Hope I Can Help :-) 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
If you are paying half the rent and utilities you have half the say in what goes on. Just give him the choice, keep sharing with you alone or living with his sister, because you won't have it any other way. Normally, issuing ultimatums is not my style, but in your case you need to really stand your ground. Her behavior will not improve when she moves in. Been there, done that and will never do it again!
2007-07-18 07:08:30 · answer #4 · answered by foodieNY 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
NO is a word.. use it.
otherwise your relationship is at stake.
you and your boyfriend need to have a serious discussion....
if all else fails get your own apartment or stay put where you currently live.
the situation with his sister living-in, isn't worth the stress, drama and chaos you describe.
you are not taking care of yourself by allowing someone to CON YOU into moving in with you.
take care.
2007-07-18 07:15:08 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Discuss this issue openly with your boyfriend. Tell him that you understand that he cares for his sister, but it will affect your relationship if she lives with you. The more open communication you have about this before you move in, the better.
2007-07-18 07:08:45 · answer #6 · answered by Stareyes 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Try to reason with him for a while to stay to help her find an apartment. Tell her if she lives with you then she must hold a stedy job. (So she can get her own apartment.)
2007-07-18 07:11:13 · answer #7 · answered by marianne p 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
she should not move in with you guys.....tell her to find a room mate. there are ads in the papers all the time for people looking to share a place
2007-07-18 07:38:33 · answer #8 · answered by RAVEN 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to dump your boyfriend. FAST! NOW! You cant go on living with this crazy situation and he obviously has no problem with it. Leave him !
2007-07-18 08:44:09 · answer #9 · answered by undone 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Easy. Tell your b/f that he is going to live with one woman only. He can pick but it is a permanent decision.
2007-07-18 07:07:29 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 3⤊ 0⤋