my mom wont let me date??

Question

well my mom thinks im irresponsible and she wont let me date and even though im good in school and clean up around the house she still wont let me date.She doesnt want me to make the same mistake she made at having a baby at 16.HELP!!!!!!

Answer 1

okay i just finished going through the same thing. I know its hard but if you drop it for a while and try your best to stay on your mom's good side you'll have a better chance when you bring it up. You know, parents I guess seem to sorta get fustrated with people, espically their kid bringing up the same things after they've already made their decision. It will just make her more angry and make her want to make her decision more and more perminant. But they love it when you make an effort to accept their decision and try to live with it. Then after about 2 weeks ( i know ... i know) drop the convo again and this time make sure its calm and offer to meet her in the middle. Even if your dating experience has limits at first, at least your dating!

Answer 2

You can't blame your mom for being cautious, but at the same time you aren't your sister. You need to prove to your mom that you are more mature and responsible than your sister. Have a good heart to heart with your mom about why you want to date and some really good ground rules you could abide by so that you could begin to date- how about curfew being nice and early, maybe only double dating with a good friend and her beau at a public place (bowling, movies, mall) and only one date a week or every two weeks. Once you begin to date and show her you are serious about abiding by the rules and are responsible maybe curfew could be moved back a little and some of the rules lightened up (remember to do your chores (and other things around the house to help the family) without being asked, be respectful to your parents and siblings and a good student) and it will all work out. Good luck and God Bless.

Answer 3

Your mom is projecting her screwup on you and knows how vulnerable you are at that age. There is wisdom of experience inher ad you should learn from it. You need to handle your mom with kid gloves. slowly introduce her to someone you like and let her get to know him slowly and build trust in her that you and he are responsible. Start with little things, and build her trust slowly. If you scew up with something irresponsible, you lose all trust in a minute. Find things you can do with multiple people that is chaperoned and public, etc. You are oing to have to work your mom through this because you ar her little baby and she fears losing you. You also don't need to be in a big hurry, focussingon what you are going to do with your life is more important now then worrying about some guy. the guys will always be there, but you don't get many chances to set your life on the right path.

Answer 4

I think she is perhaps more scared of the prospect of teenage pregnancy, disease, and even coming to grips that you are becoming an adult. She is overly protective and I don't blame her with trends these days of 11 year-olds having sex. She probably just wants you to enjoy your youth without having to deal with overtly complicated grown-up issues.

The trend these days is no longer harmless dating with a peck here and a peck there. Most people and young adults launch themselves into serious relationships. Looking back at all of the students in high school that professed their never-dying love and justifying their actions for sex at 15 and 16, I just shake my head. I am almost glad that my mom never let me date in high school. In the last few months of my senior year, I was allowed to date (with someone mature and out of high school) and didn't have all of the crazy distractions that most girls had.

Try to have a conversation letting her know you feelings. Explore with her how you would engage in dating, whether you will keep it simple and innocent for her sanity (no sex). Tell her that you don't want to miss out on having dates for homecomings and proms. Tell her you want a crosage on your wrist not a ring on your finger! Just push a little, not too much. That is how you expand your boundaries. Don't start crying or putting up a fuss, then she will look at you like you are not mature enough to make proper decisions when you go out with a guy.

Don't be so upset about it. I remember in high school all of the boyfriend and girlfriend swapping and the whole drama of it all. It actually kind of grosses me out. As an adult in a serious relationship and talking about kids in the future, I wonder what would I do if I had a girl in high school. I would probably do the same as my mother. Just think about it, really.

Answer 5

Dating is not what you should be focusing on right now. Live life as a child. It's not worth the drama trust me. I hope you listen to these words. I don't want you to end up like someone that was close to me. She's not dead or anything but it didn't end pretty well because now she's a prostitute. Her first time was 4 months ago. It's not where you want to be in life to consider dating because no matter how hard you or those who care about you try, it can get out of hand very quickly. Please listen to me.

Answer 6

I had a baby at 15 so I understand her concern. See if she'll allow group dates or chaperoned dates. Then maybe she'll see that you are responsible in the way you conduct yourself on dates and loosen up the rules a little.

Answer 7

A lot of moms are like that. There are two options that you can choose:

1) deal with it

2) lie to her.

Now I'm not sure if lying is the best thing to do...there are like a million couples at my school and most of them their parents dont know. Well you should really think about it. I dont think you should lie though.

Answer 8

She's trying to protect you and that's what Moms are supposed to do. I think if you sit down and CALMLY explain to her that you will not repeat what she did and outline how responsible you are, etc, she may change her mind. Also, a group date (with a large group of friends) instead of just you and a boy, may make her feel better.

Answer 9

Well how old r u? im 14 and ive only had 2 gfs

Answer 10

So you were a mistake she's saying...nice. Hyprocrite.
I'd sit down and have a talk with her about responsibility and knowledge and how things have changed since her "mistake"