Me & my ex have the same friends. Thing is, they all do drugs a lot of the time, especially him (he's a dealer), but they are doing me no good and I really can't handle the come down any more.
I did some this weekend for first weekend in weeks and it resulted in 3 days off work, feeling like I was nothing and asking the horrible bully ex boyfriend back (who said no, and made me feel even worse).
I've been suffering depression and know that the drugs and especially the ex have been adding to that, so know that I need to cut them out to move on and get better.
But I can't cut him out if we have mutual friends can I? Unless I cut out the friends too. We are all booked on a holiday to Ibiza which is going to be dg-fuelled and I'm worried about the effect it'll have on me when I get back.
It's the first time in my life I've had proper friends of my own, but I can't deal with the party lifestyle.
I feel so sad - is the only option to cut him & friends out? :-(
2007-07-18 04:29:36 · 37 answers · asked by rollacoasta 3 in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
Sorry, but yes. I've had the same problem in the past. Friends who were constantly whacked out, and after I gave everything up I found that the only way to get away from the scene was to give them up.
A couple of them are now dead, others have spent time in the cells, so it was the best thing I could have done.
For your own sake, you should start afresh.
2007-07-18 04:33:25 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 0⤋
I just need to read the first paragraph to say YES cut them off.
You don't need friends who are doing drugs, you seems like a nice girl . I know it will be difficult but you can find friends that will make you happy and laugh and be there for you without needs for any drugs or alcohol. Cancel the holiday to Ibiza with them and go on your own somewhere else where you can relax.
It is the only option unfortunately
Good luck
You can always e-mail if you need to chat.
2007-07-18 04:37:13 · answer #2 · answered by Maon 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
what would you like to have in life in long terms, drugs will make you worse as you said depression drugs will take over your life and it can ruin your life your orgons will stop workin what about if and when you want kids , do you really want to have kids in your sitiutions the path you are leading is a wrong one and i am sorry to say you do want a boy friend like the one you have or the friends, you need a clean break from this kind life start a fresh forget the hols and get your self sorted out with a small break for youe self go somewhere where there is fresh Air like lake distrtict dont tell your boy friend or his/your friends either think about NUMORO UNO. get on with your Job and you will meet sombody who really likes you for what you are and not what you do . It seems to me you are a very nice looking and very Intelligent and from a good home ,so dont go to that road pick your self up and do thr right thing for better and for the long term and i think you will thank me for it
2007-07-18 04:58:44 · answer #3 · answered by Bharat P 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Most certainly.
It sounds as though are really trying to get off the drugs, but being around them will be counterproductive.
I know this sounds easy but you need to get away from them all, move house, or go and stay with someone for a while until you get out of the habit of meeting these so called friends.
Don`t go to the same haunts as them, make new friends. You don`t sound an introvert who is afraid to meet new people.
At the end of the day a total lifestyle is needed to getaway from them, and you have made the first important step by making your concerns known.
Best of luck to you.
2007-07-18 04:41:02 · answer #4 · answered by firebobby 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Frankly, yes, get well away from them. If they're into drugs then they are scumbags and, like anyone who has anything to do with drugs, they should be shot down like dogs. Furthermore, if your ex is a dealer then you should turn him in to the police, he's a criminal. Forget the trip to Ibiza, by the time you return you'll be just as bad as them, and your life will never be your own. Dump them all before they make you as bad as they are.
2007-07-18 14:04:54 · answer #5 · answered by Mike S 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Make new friends, these people are not into positive stuff at all. Main hobby: drugs, main interest: drugs, social interaction: drugs. Without the drugs - what do you all have in common: not much except drugs. Why? F up.
Join a club, gym, swim, hike, whatever your interests are. You know what the drugs did to you on the weekend and what they made you feel like. What good is that?
Making friends may not be as difficult as you think, you will be happier in the end. I promise you this.
2007-07-18 04:37:08 · answer #6 · answered by Pacifica 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
These people get you to do drugs that make you miss work and feel horrible, plus the ex who is also a dealer, and you call them "friends"?
You've already said it... they are doing you no good. They are not really friends because they encourage you to do something that is harmful.
Cut them all out of you life and focus on your "proper" friends. True friends will help build you up and become a better person, not tear you down and destroy you. I would also advise to not go on the holiday. Your instincts are correct that it will have a bad effect on you.
Good luck!
2007-07-18 04:35:28 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 4⤊ 0⤋
I think you're going to get a lot of politically correct answers to this one. People will all say to cut them out, as if it's easy.
I never got into heavy drugs, but I had friends that did. I think there's a halfway step that you can take. I think you can remain in contact with your friends, minus the ex, but avoid trips like the one to Ibiza, and even hanging out with them for a while. You should not go on that trip. Make an excuse and get out of it.
I think you just need to cut it back about 90%. Talk to them, leave friendship open, but don't visit them in person, and leave at the first sign of drugs. Mostly cut out just hanging with the whole gang, even if that means not at all.
The truth that most people don't know is that some will come off drugs and be alright, and that some won't. Keep in contact, but wait until they join you in a drug free lifestyle before you go back to being the kind of friend that hangs out regularly.
2007-07-18 04:45:43 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 3⤋
Obviously, your ex and your friends has a negative affect on your self esteem and your health. These "friends" are people you hang out with, they are not friends (can you trust them with your deepest thought and secrets?). All of what you mentioned is negativity you do not need in your life. When you'll get rid of everybody that makes you feel this way your depression will go away ... that is if you stop taking drugs. Hang out else where and you'll attract other kind of people.
2007-07-18 04:38:03 · answer #9 · answered by Artemis 2 · 2⤊ 0⤋
You must stand up for yourself! Don't go on the holiday & whilst he's away start your new life without him. You need to be strong & take a big step away from your boyfriend & the mutual friends you share.
If any of these people are real friends you will soon see. Any that aren't you can do without, move on.
2007-07-18 04:40:06 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋