A funny for you, do you have one for me?

Question

Nine-year-old Joey was asked by his mother what he had learned
in
Sunday School.

"Well, Mom, our teacher told us how God sent Moses behind enemy
lines on
a rescue mission to lead the Israelites out of Egypt. When he got to
the Red
Sea, he had his engineers build a pontoon bridge, and all the people
walked
across safely. He used his walkie-talkie to radio headquarters and call
in
an air strike. They sent in bombers to blow up the bridge and all the
Israelites were saved."

"Now, Joey, is that REALLY what your teacher taught you?" his mother

asked.

"Well, no, Mom, but if I told it the way the teacher did, you'd
never
believe it!"

Answer 1

Yes , I hve many, but will stick to only one, from my youngest son when he was about 8 , he is now almost 40, but we all still laugh. The story part isnt funny , but God can give some humor in all things. Myolder son was dying and we had to discuss this with my son and went into a small subject of how wonderful Heaven was. The subject is huge, but in his little mind, we had to keep it simple. WE read thru some children books that showed Heaven too with its beauty and all the beautiful there and the gorous lawns, this was in the picture book. Sudenly he looed up and looked so mad at me. He said MOMMA You LIED TO ME. I said No I didint. HE said YES YOU DID, YOU SAID HEAVEN IS PERFECT AND SEE ALL THOSE LAWN, WHO MOWS THOSE LAWNS// THAT IS WORK AND SO IF WE HAVE TO WORK IN HEAVEN, I WOULDNT CALL IT PERFECT. I must admit it caught us off guard and were speechless for only a tiny little nanu second. hahahaha So I explained as best I could to that little boy that what work there is in Heaven we wont mind, as its all wonderful there. Took a bit and I did my best, and he finally got ok with this. But the look on his face was even funnier than what he said, in that little bitty mind. He was a smart kid, still is, tho not a kid anymore. But just the look of sheer horror of having to mow lawns in heaven, when he wasnt even old enough to mow the lawn yet, was just so funny. How kids see things is so neat, in their own pure, innocent little minds, they have more going on there than we think they do. Even tho the situation at that time was sad, that particular moment caused us to laugh once we got thru it, and it was well needed humor from God. Even in the midst of a storm, God can send such precious joy.
Loved your story too.
thanks. Love to hear more, hope you get a lot.. Out of the mouths of babes. hahahaha

Answer 2

LOL! Here are a couple short fun ones.

Q. What do they call pastors in Germany?
A. German Shepherds.

Q. Who was the greatest financier in the Bible?
A. Noah. He was floating his stock while everyone else was in
liquidation.


Q. Who was the greatest female financier in the Bible?
A. Pharaoh's daughter. She went down to the bank of the Nile
and drew out a little prophet.


Q. What kind of motor vehicles are in the Bible?
A. Jehovah drove Adam and Eve out of the Garden in a Fury.
David's Triumph was heard throughout the land. Also, probably a Honda,
because the apostles were all in one Accord.

Q. Who was the greatest comedian in the Bible?
A. Samson. He brought the house down.


Q. What excuse did Adam give to his children as to why he no
longer lived in Eden?
A. Your mother ate us out of house and home.


Q. Which servant of God was the most flagrant lawbreaker in the Bible?
A. Moses. He broke all 10 commandments at once.


Q. Which area of Palestine was especially wealthy?
A. The area around Jordan. The banks were always overflowing.

Q. Who is the greatest baby sitter mentioned in the Bible?
A. David. He rocked Goliath to a very deep sleep.

Q. Which Bible character had no parents?
A. Joshua, son of Nun.

Answer 3

A visiting Pastor asked to the Sunday School kids:

Who destroyed the Jericho walls?
Student 1 : (bit kinda shocked and trembling) No, i didn't do that.

Same Q to Student 2.
Ans: (bit more terrified and scared) Not me Sir!!

same Q to Student 3. (Pastor felt a littleamused, and angry)
Who destroyed Jericho?
Ans: I SWEAR BY GOD!! I'VE NE'ER DONE SUCH IN LIFE (shivering)

Finally asked the Headmaster why yor pupils answer this way, dont know who destroyed JERICHO!!!??

HeadMaster: My students are all good. They dont do such things..:)

Answer 4

Oh yes! I have a GREAT funny for you called "The Pastor's Business Card."

A new pastor was visiting in the homes of his parishioners. At one
House it seemed obvious that someone was at home, but no answer came to his repeated knocks at the door. Therefore, he took out a business card and wrote "Revelation 3:20" on the back of it and stuck it in the door.
When the offering was processed the following Sunday, he found that his card had been returned. Added to it was this cryptic message, "Genesis 3:10." Reaching for his Bible to check out the citation, he broke up in gales of laughter. Revelation 3:20 begins "Behold, I stand at the door and knock." Genesis 3:10 reads, "I heard your voice in the garden and I was afraid for I was naked."

Answer 5

WRONG EMAIL ADDRESS

A lesson to be learned from typing the wrong email address!!!!!!

A Minneapolis couple decided to go to Florida to thaw out during a particularly icy winter. They planned to stay at the same hotel where they spent their honeymoon 20 years earlier. Because of hectic schedules, it was difficult to coordinate their travel schedules. So, the husband left Minnesota and flew to Florida on Thursday, with his wife flying down the following day. The husband checked into the hotel. There was a computer in his room, so he decided to send an email to his wife. However, he accidentally left out one letter in her email address and without realizing his error, sent the email.

Meanwhile, somewhere in Houston , a widow had just returned home from her husband's funeral. He was a minister who was called home to glory following a heart attack. The widow decided to check her email's expecting messages from relatives and friends. After reading the first message, she screamed and fainted. The widow's son rushed into the room, found his mother on the floor, and saw the computer screen which read:

To: My Loving Wife
Subject: I've Arrived

Date: February 27, 2006

I know you're surprised to hear from me. They have computers here now and you are allowed to send emails to your loved ones. I've just arrived and have been checked in.

I see that everything has been prepared for your arrival tomorrow. Looking forward to seeing you then! Hope your journey is as uneventful as mine was.

P.S. Sure is freaking hot down here!!!!!!

Answer 6

haha

Um There was a little girl who was thaught she was going to throw up In Church so she leaned over to her dad and said where do i go if I need to throw up and The dad replied run Down That hall and The Bathroom is the Last Door In a min The Girl got up and Ran down The Hall. when She Returned The dad ask did U make It and She then said I saw a box That Said For The sick so I threw Up There

HaHa

Answer 7

A college professor was teaching a class on evolution and said to the class

"If there were a God he would give me a sign, right now"
God, if you are out there... give me a sign!

Then one of the kids in the back row came up and punched the professor in the face and said, God was busy so he sent me!

Answer 8

That is so like they way we are Hard to belive what hasnt been seen.Jesus is real so is life after death.Ther is 2 choises we can make if we dont choose it will be done for us .Jesus said come unto me like a child.

Answer 9

Thank you very much for the laugh.
I am so sorry I have nothing funny to repay your kindness :(

Peace to you forever for sharing.

Answer 10

lol. but sorry don't have one for you.