i broke up with my boyfriend on 16th july wev been together for a year and roughy 2months. i got him a 007 collection thing just the one film no extras - waaay to expensive! and i duno what to do - shall i give it to him still or not? i want to but there just other things involved - he spent over £140 on my bday, my dad dont want me to because he thinks it may send mix messages n that i dnt know!!
another thing...wev just broke up and wev agreed to be friends. Now hes being realy nice and stuff and i duno iv been online with him 2 nyts on the spin - i think thats bad coz it might send him mixd messages too...shall i stop and just go on every now and then? i mean i do it coz i have nothin to do..my whole day was planned with him and all my friends are on holiday but me...please just help its first real relationship with this guy and i need some wise advice.
2007-07-18 01:30:58 · 34 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
Just give it to him if you are still friends..
2007-07-18 01:32:41 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 2⤋
I ended things with a guy I was seeing not too long before Christmas one year and I returned the gift I had for him. Your Dad is right, it would send mixed messages. You broke it off, you don't want him thinking there's any hope. If the friend thing works for you two then so be it but yes, don't keep regular contact with him. Once in awhile is okay, an e-mail here and there or the odd chat but any more and you might as well have not broken if off!
Good luck and sell, return or keep that gift for yourself!
2007-07-18 01:46:23 · answer #2 · answered by Ersabette 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Are you really broken up, or just having an argument?
If you are really broken up, then do not give the present. Send it back, or sell it on Ebay.
If you are really broken up and don't want to get back together do not give him the present.
If you are broken up, but want to get back together, then you could give him the present.
First you have to decide where your relationship is. If you don't know, then don't give the present.
If you think you might get back together in the future, you could keep it and give it to him later, like for Christmas or whatever holiday you might celebrate. (Trying to be politically correct here.)
Being in a relationship is hard, but breaking up and handling the lonliness afterwards is harder. Don't hang out with him and/or give him the present just to have something to do. That's not fair to either of you, and only makes the heart ache linger.
Do you really, I mean really still like him, or do you hope to get past this and move on? Once you figure that out, then you'll know what to do.
PS. If you cannot afford the present, then don't give it to him, send it back or sell it and purchase something you can really afford. I make it a policy of my own, which has helped me out many times, to not give a gift to empress somebody - or try to "buy their friendship or love -, but I give a gift from the heart, but mostly one I can afford.
Good luck and I am sorry you are having problems. Things always work out, even if you don't think so right now, they will.
2007-07-18 01:43:52 · answer #3 · answered by Ann B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
hey, I've just been through the same thing but me and my ex went out for 3 years. He was also friendly and stuff once we broke up and that gave me mixed messages. It was really bad. The best advice I can give you is break off from him completely. Don't remain friends because that just complicates things. And don't give him the 007 collection thing otherwise he'll think you're still interested and play your feelings!
2007-07-18 01:35:46 · answer #4 · answered by Lancy 1 · 1⤊ 0⤋
When I broke up with my boyfriend, I still gave him a birthday gift. I told him that even though we are over, I wanted to him him the bday gift as a friend. We are still good friends and once in a while hang out. He didn't get any mix messages at all. You must decide if you want to give it to him or you can return it to get your money back.
2007-07-18 01:35:59 · answer #5 · answered by ? 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I feel that u must get get him something b/c even though u too have broke up u nonetheless must be neighbors. I am having the identical drawback right now. I just broke up with my bf of four months and his bday is january 23, which is tommorrow. I dont believe i will have to get him anything but i will nonetheless inform him happy bday so he'll still comprehend that i deal with him.
2016-08-04 05:37:03 · answer #6 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ask him to go out for coffee.. and explain that you are glad things are working out as friends.Wish him a Happy Birthday and tell him you bought his present a while ago and you don't want to return it.. just because you broke up.So as a friend the gift is yours and clearly let him know it is of friendship now..not of a relationship point of view. If you are clear there will be no problems.
2007-07-18 01:48:40 · answer #7 · answered by hollie s 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him the gift. You don't know what tomorrow brings but if you don't give it to him, you will regret it, either sooner or later.
What he spent on you is irrelevant, the thought and time spent on a gift far outweigh the money spent on it.
You're missing him and the contact, which is why you've gone online and chatted. That's normal. Whether it's good or not, only time will tell.
Seems to me that the reason you bought the gift still stands, so give it to him. Which is more important to you; his happiness or your bank balance?
Give him the gift and you'll give a little of yourself. Sometimes it hurts, sometimes it helps, but it always helps us grow.
2007-07-18 01:41:16 · answer #8 · answered by redkite71 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Not sure why you guys split up - but if I were you - dont give him the present - your dad's right - it sends mixed messages. Keep the present for a while and see how things turn out with him - if you get back together then give him the gift at christmas, if things dont work out - then sell it on ebay and get as much of your money back as possible.
good luck
2007-07-18 01:35:29 · answer #9 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give him the gift,at least for the year you spent together and that fact that you have remained friends. Clear up any mixed message by writing a card saying for my new friend. If there is no animosity,I can't see why you can't celebrate the birthday of a friend.
2007-07-18 01:35:21 · answer #10 · answered by Barbara D 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
The second you give him this present is the second he will have nothing more to do with you. Why don't you keep it, don't tell him about it and give it to him in the future if you get back together. Wait a few months and you will know one way or the other!
2007-07-18 01:34:16 · answer #11 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋