Myself and my ex were totally in love and he said we were soul mates. At 3 months we were going to move out together. We got a place and the day we were going to move i freaked out. I didnt know how i felt anymore. I began to push him away by picking on his flaws. I really damaged his self esteem and said some hurtfull things. I eventually i broke up with him. He was totally devistated.
I began seeing someone else soon after, but i realised that i loved my ex and that it was my fears that had made me push him away. I have contacted him and told him that i still love him and have never stoped. He is currently engaging in rebound behaviour with girls and drinking alot. He spent time talking to me on the ph. and once when we were out, but he doesnt want to be friends cause its too hard and he told me we were done. It still feels like he has feelings for me. Is he still hurt and doesnt want to let me in right now? Will he ever come back and give me the chance to make it up to him?
2007-07-17 17:56:06 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
All of your questions.....time will tell. It is impossible to know what someone else will do. All I can say, if you really love him and want to make things work. Give it time. You hurt him dearly. He is reacting. In the mean time, live your life and when he does come around, if you still feel the same way....that is awesome. Otherwise keep on living.
2007-07-17 18:00:27 · answer #1 · answered by Steph 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
So you guys figured out you were soul-mates and almost moved in together at 3 months? Then you think you had commitment issues? Sounds like you were both way too much in a hurry to rush a relationship further. You were probably right to get a bit frightened. How you handled it is an entirely different story. In time, you will probably get him to give you a chance. But will he trust you again? Will you be able to deal with someone who will not trust you going out by yourself in case other guys are around? Question whoever you are talking to on the phone? These are all things you will probably have to deal with after that mess. Is it something you feel would be tolerable? If not, just try to be friends and enjoy being single for a bit before you jump into something ELSE way too deep too fast.
2007-07-17 18:04:37 · answer #2 · answered by SubNRG 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Well....no.
You pushed him away when it was a key moment in your relationship, started seeing someone else and dumped him flat on his ***. The guy loved you. I'm sure you did too. But 'confused' people don't do that to their significant other.
He got hurt. And now he's not wanting to get hurt again. It is difficult to trust someone who displayed the type of behaviour you did towards him.
I am not putting you down as a person. It's cliche but yes, everyone makes mistakes. This mistake, as you see it, cost you a relationship.
Really, what it is (more cliche I know), is a learning experience. You won't do that to the next guy will you? Take this time to NOT rebound date and figure out what exactly scares you about committment and what it means to be in a long-term relationship (co-habiting can be seen as marriage). If you're willing to live with someone like husband and wife, then treat the relationship as such. Treat it with respect.
The next person you meet, date, and decide to take the next step with, will meet an entirely different woman.
Take care...
2007-07-17 18:14:07 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
I guess you will have to keep on contacting him and at the same time be there for him as much as possible. Since this is a hard time for him, he needs constant support from the people around him.
And since the source of the problem comes from you, all the more you should be there for him, I think if he still has feelings for you, he would do things or want your attention even more and to get back to you.
During this period, just observe the way he look at you, the things he say to you, I think you will be able to feel it.....by then, you two will probably be together again.
Good Luck ^^
2007-07-17 18:02:09 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
if i were him, i won't look back...like you said, you totally push him away with whatever you did and he must have felt really hurt.
if you had suddenly felt all those insecurities, you should have talked it through with him and not doing what you have done.
If you do get back again, it will always be like a broken mirror. no matter how you fix it, you will always see the crack lines.
2007-07-17 18:00:36 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Chances are, he won't come back. Sometimes words are more damaging than any kind of weapon. Chalk it up to a lesson learned and don't make the same mistake twice.
2007-07-17 18:00:15 · answer #6 · answered by Kayt 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You definately need to give him time and space, but do tell him him how you feel and just be there for him,but keep your distance and in the end if you were meant to be together you will be together.
2007-07-17 18:06:15 · answer #7 · answered by princessdiane528 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You devastated the guy, cut him rteally deeply. Why should he trust you? You ripped his heart out. Spend time getting to know about yourself. Learn and move on.
2007-07-17 18:01:10 · answer #8 · answered by Pure Star 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe. Me, I'd tell him not to, though, until you get your head sorted out. What's to stop you doing the same thing again? Get yourself some counseling and try to figure out what's up.
2007-07-17 17:59:50 · answer #9 · answered by John R 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Ms.... Send a photo of yours to this email i will tell you what will happen.
bahsirbaaser@yahoo.com
Regards,
2007-07-17 18:19:14 · answer #10 · answered by Mohd Bashir B 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋