I got drunk and kissed another guy. Should i tell my boyfriend?

Question

Me and my boyfriend have been dating for about 2 months and i like him sooo much. I dont know what to do..he knows i was drunk but doesnt know i kissed another guy. I remember doing it but i also remember telling him i had a boyfriend and to stop. Alot of people already know (people that talk to my bf) what i did and im afraid he will find out from someone else..would it be better if i told him or just wait and see if he finds out?

and by the way the other guy made the move first..i really didnt realize what was going on until he was on top of me and i told him to stop.

i am not a big drinker..so this is not something that will EVER happen again.

Answer 1

Making out with someone other than your boyfriend when you are drunk isn't the worst thing you could do. Happens to the best of us.

I wish you didn't have to tell your BF. I wish you could live silently with your regrets, learn from them, and just move on. Unfortunately, it may be best for the both of you that he finds out from you first. If he were to find out from someone else first, he might feel like a fool, and feel doubly hurt.

I made the mistake of trying to hide something similar and it came back to haunt me TWO years later when a drunken friend accidentally spilled the beans to my girlfriend at the time. That girlfriend called me at work to tell me she knew. I heard it in DOLBY Digital Surround and I could feel myself shrink by 40%. Needless to say, it sucked and that relationship has long since ended.

Just as there is no good time to tell him, there is also no best way to break it to him. Start by being kind to yourself and forgiving yourself. Tell him what you did and that you are sorry, but most of all listen really well to what he is saying and let him know that you hear and understand everything he is saying. Don't worry about being forgiven at the moment, just be there to hear him out and give him the space to take the bad news.

Good luck.

Answer 2

Hmmm... I remember answering a similar question not too long ago.

I think you should just let it go. Because you'd be opening a can of worms.

First of all, do you remember if you kissed first or the other guy? I have a feeling that this other guy just totally surprised you and before you knew what was happening, he had already kissed you. That is not your fault! And you told him you have a bf. So you did the right thing. I don't think you should feel guilty at all!!!!

But...please try not to get drunk to a point that you don't remember things. It's very dangerous. And a harmless kiss could be the least of your worries. Make sure that you're always safe. Ok, ok, I'm lecturing you a bit here, but I mean well. Really.

Answer 3

I'm not sure I'm buying the "I don't remember" part. Unless you were in a full-on black-out, you can remember. So were you? And if so, how can you be certain that all you did was kiss? But yeah, you totally didn't black-out, and you DO remember. There is no need to pretend with us, the anonymous internet dwellers. No need to be embarassed, we don't know the guy you kissed. Someone is bound to call you a nasty name either way, so next time, just be honest. DO not tell your boyfriend, unless you are worried someone else will beat you to the punch. But I wouldn't. I mean, hey - a whole bunch of people in here bought your "I don't remember" story, so maybe he will too. And really, honey - I am not judging you for drinking, but I AM judging you for putting yourself in such a vulnerable position. Any idea how many decent young women end up raped because they just wanted to let loose, like you? If you're going to drink to excess, please make sure it's in an environment where you are safe, or at least, have a friend with you, and look out for one another. Be safe, ok?

Answer 4

Tell him the truth then he will have more trust in you but if you wait and he finds out from someone else he might not want to stay in a relationship with you if you are going to keep things from him.

Answer 5

I believe you should tell him. It was alchohol that kissed not you. I wouldn't use it for an everyday excuse but if this was out of character for you that you don't usually get drunk than I think he should forgive you. If you do get drunk a lot I wouldn't trust yourself and I don't think he should either. In this case I would say go and get help for alchohol abuse.

Answer 6

If you tell him you do right by him. If he leaves you then learn from your mistake and resolve to be more faithful in the future. If he stays he respects your relationship with him and understands that you told him because you care enough.

If the fact that you owned up fails to foster any benevolence on his part, his shortcoming is as faulted as yours.

Answer 7

tell him 4 urself.if sum1 else tells him it will b like he felt he got stabed in the back..tell him that u remember kissing him but told the person 2 stop.tell him u didn't mean it and it meant nothing.and that u like him sooooo much and that u care about him.hope this helps=)!

Answer 8

Tell him before someone else does. If someone else does tell him your heart. As for drinking...getting drunk should not be what you do. Do not put yourself into places where you have to dig yourself out of.

Answer 9

Wow. That was dumb. You should tell him. Normally, I would say that you are only interested in causing more chaos... but in this case... he's going to find out anyway.

Answer 10

if other people know you should tell him. otherwise you will have to deal with feeling guilty. what doesnt come out in the wash comes out in the rinse