Is it better to tell the child when he/she is still young, or is it better to wait till the child is older?
2007-07-17 15:09:21 · 15 answers · asked by Mia 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
It's better to introduce the subject as early as possible. The child will then know the truth from the beginning and it won't seem like a shock or betrayal. Some parents tell their adopted child that they are a child of their heart, a child deliberately chosen by a couple to share their lives.
2007-07-17 15:14:07 · answer #1 · answered by friendlyadvice 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Do it while they are young, so it will not be a shock to them when they are older. My dad drowned when I was 2 years old. My mom remarried when I was 4. But, my mom never let me forget my dad, even tho I never knew him, other than as an infant.
For adopted children, they should be told and reminded, as they grow. I think at 3 is a good age, and keep reminding them they are loved by you, and you picked then out special. If you wait, they will think you have deceived them all their life.
2007-07-17 15:14:53 · answer #2 · answered by Hickemtwiddle 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
when they are of age to understand more readily. if you tell a child at a young age say 10 they will probably start to feel bad about themselves, why did she give me away? etc. depending on how evolved this child is, i think someone should wait until their 18 to divulge this information.
good luck:)
2007-07-17 15:16:27 · answer #3 · answered by shygirl 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
As soon as you believe that the child is old enough to understand what adoption means.
2007-07-17 15:13:38 · answer #4 · answered by la buena bruja 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
i think when the child is young cuz if u wait until he/she is older thay will feel like u lied to them their whole life ( =
2007-07-17 15:14:32 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
When she's 17.
What good would it do now? All it would do is put doubt, and wonder in her head, and maybe hurt feelings that her parent's didn't want her.
Tell her at 17, and explain to her that you didn't want to tell her until she was old enough to understand. By then she will also be old enough to understand why you waited.
2007-07-17 18:09:23 · answer #6 · answered by jonesk_92656 3 · 0⤊ 1⤋
better to tell them whenever you can. as soon as possible. a child would be resentful either way you look at it. if you leave it for later, they may never speak to you again. best to explain to them why you didnt tell them earlier too
2007-07-17 15:15:22 · answer #7 · answered by kristyb872001 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Right from birth.
2007-07-17 16:36:42 · answer #8 · answered by tjnstlouismo 7 · 0⤊ 1⤋
To be honest. I have seen good and bad with both.
Sometimes if you tell them too early, they have an abandonment problem.
If you tell them later, they might think you lied to them about things.
2007-07-17 15:16:58 · answer #9 · answered by mel s 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let them know right away. Only your secrets can hurt you. Let them know that you loved them so much that you CHOSE them - it was not an accident. Good luck and God bless you.
2007-07-17 15:13:01 · answer #10 · answered by onparadisebeach 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋