How long will my new cat take to warm up to me and stop being frighten?

Question

I just got him a week ago, he is 1 year old beautiful He hides and sneaks around us. No toy or snack will get him out or close to us. I got him from the rescue leage. They said he was shy, I think he was abused. Any suggestions to get him to like me and trust me. He does play with my 7 year old cat. No problem there. I would like to get him to be my lap cat and I can't even get him near me. Help?

Answer 1

Time cats don't adjust to change very well. Take it slow and just sit on floor and let him come to you.

Answer 2

Some cats are always like that. We took a stray in from outside a few months ago and he still won't let us near him. BUT that doesn't mean it will happen that way for you!

If he was abused then he's going to take a while to warm up. Maybe even up to a few weeks. Constantly talk "sweet" to him, pet him, show him lots of attention. Catnip is great! I use Cosmic Catnip. Catnip filled mice are good toys. Crinkle balls might/might not work. It makes crinkly sounds so I'm not sure if your nervous cat will like that or not.
Dangle string in front of him. A toy at the end of string. A feather. Balls. Run your fingers back & forth across the carpet quickly. Cats are sometimes attracted to the sound and movement.

Hang in there; it might take a little while but eventually he will come around.

Good luck!

Answer 3

Hey, the cat has probably been through alot of moving around and stress so give him/her time.. animals take awhile to warm up and trust humans ... ecspecially if abused before since you said he/she was from a rescue. Most likely if it is getting along with the other cat it will be fine in time he will start to do what the other cat does and fit in fine with the fam. Just continue to love it an it will learn to love you dont push it to much you might frighten tht aminal more and it will be scared of you. dont want that.

I brought my boyfriend 2 cats alittle over a year ago and got them a few weeks after they were born. he wanted a dog but couldnt have one where he lives so therefore the cats. one boy and one girl. the girl is very playful and outgoing where he is very scitish (sorry cant spell that) and shy ... still. hes around them everyday and the cat still runs its just his personality. If you walk in the room he runs as if guily its kind of funny and he takes every toy or item he can run off with and stashs them.. hes alittle weird just saying if the lady at the rescue place said hes shy it could just be the cats personality.

no worries it'll warm up eventually

Answer 4

I adopted my youngest cat from a shelter. He was about 6 months old and feral. He too was like your cat. Patience, love, and more patience is all you need. Just be very gentle, don't speak in a loud voice to him. If you approach him and he runs don't follow him under the bed. Just let him be. One day you'll seem him venture out here or there in your presence. Just watch him. Don't approach him or he'll run back under the bed. It took almost at least six months for him to get comfortable being in a non-feral environment. He's now about six years old and he still runs under the bed at the first sound he doesn't recognize or is too loud or if you move to quick in front of him. He does though in quiet times lay down beside my chair. He's not a lap cat but he does snuggle up against me at night on the bed. I'm the only one he trusts. Patience, gentleness and love is all you need.

Answer 5

Well you could be right with the whole him being abused before you got him but some types of cats are just naturally shy and dont like being with people. Give the cat a few weeks and see what happens. He should come around sooner or later!

Answer 6

It is possible your new kitty may never be a lap cat. Since he is already one, he is usually set in his ways. What the rescue league said may be true -- some cats are just shy, especially those who go to a new family. He may have been undersocialized as a kitten and may remain wary of people. He may also grow to love you, but still be wary. Remember, cats are independent -- sometimes they cannot get enough of you, other times, they don't even know you are alive.

Answer 7

Just be patient, he will come around. Most likely a week or two. Try talking to him, giving him treats. Get a cat toy that he might like and play on the floor with him. You have to spend time with him and show him your not going to hurt him. Then the trust will come.

Answer 8

Watch him peruse through the house and see what he likes most, then relocate whatever it is (provided it's feasible) to an area of the house where you tend to be a lot, such as a living room. Now, he may not respond to it, but it worked for my cat. If it works, he will gradually ease into being in the same room with you, and you can start hand offering treats, or toys.

Answer 9

try to find you're cat and spend time with him in his hiding space. you're cat may have faced a tragic moment or thinks you are scary because you're 8 times his height.
also he may never be you're lap cat. most adopted & rescued cats never stay on you're lap for 5 seconds. you're cat may be a lap cat through instinct like my adopted cat Dickens a Bombay. the best lap cats are Bombays & Manxs.
training may help but don't put you're hopes up.

so you can tell if you're cat is a Bombay or Manx:
Bombay-short haired, shiny, black haired-looks like a minuter black panther
Manx-bob tailed cat, short hair, assorted colors, DOESN'T have hair flowing out it's back legs an over the tail. (that is a Cymric)

Answer 10

2 Weeks

Answer 11

Well, if you have the time to simply sit in one spot near him and talk to him, maybe every so often taking a toy and playing with it (not with him but with yourself) or having your other cat with you, then this should comfort him after awhile to come and be with you. This could take some hours of sitting there, though, so you should be committed to the idea beforehand.