ok simple question my ex dumped me because she said it seemed like we were best friends not bf/gf and she started dating someone 2 weeks later- we dated for 4 years ( and do u think her ne bf is a rebound or not)i think mayb she just wants to get out there a lil bit do u think i could win her back? (not saying i want her back but do u think she''ll be back)what do u suggest? and she's really upset cuz i wont talk to her ( for now so i can get over it) like she texted me at 3 am one night asking if we could start talkin again and a couple more messages saying she missis me. and she cried when i told her i didnt want to communicate for a while and we could when and if i was ready
THANKS
2007-07-17 09:09:58 · 15 answers · asked by Nanonan m 2 in Family & Relationships ➔ Singles & Dating
I know you were only bf/gf, but for future reference, a marriage is ALL ABOUT being best friends with your mate. And being bf/gf is the start of a marriage. DO NOT correspond with her right now. She broke up with you and you should not be the crutch to help her through it. After a while, your pain will subside and you will once again be thinking clearly. Don't sit around and wait for her to come back, you'll go crazy. Go out with friends and meet other gals. In time, you may find what you had with her wasn't really what you wanted to begin with. Or you may find she is what you want after all. But take this advice and get her out of your life until you both figure out what it is you need in a relationship.
2007-07-17 09:37:41 · answer #1 · answered by Dave J 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Either that other guy was a rebound or she really left you because she was interested in getting with him. And in my opinion, there is no problem whatsoever with being best friend's with your boyfriend. That's the way it should be. Maybe she really does miss you. Absence makes the heart grow fonder. Four years is a long time, maybe all she really needed was some time apart. But she should've just told you that to begin with. I understand you're upset, you have every right to be, but don't be mad at her. Clearly she is just as confused as you are and doesn't know what to do. The only real way to find out what is right for the both of you is to sit down and have a long honest discussion with one another. She needs to be honest with you about why she broke up with you. You both need to tell each other exactly how you feel, what was going wrong, what things could change for the better, what it is you want, and where you want to be as far as this relationship goes. No one else can tell you what is right for you. It's all up to what you two are willing to do to save this relationship that you've spent so long working on. Good Luck with Everything.
2007-07-17 16:24:06 · answer #2 · answered by LilMiss143 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Dude, my take on the whole thing is that the whole friends thing is an excuse. AND you don't date someon two weeks later all of a sudden. She probably had liked this guy for some while and either A) didn't want to cheat on you with him so she broke up with you or B) had been with him already and wanted to try things out with him.
As far as missing you? Of course she misses you! You guys were together for 4 years. I don't think she will do you right though if you keep talking to her so that's probably the best think even if it hurts. Just keep her out of your life. Good luck and there are plenty of woman out there...really, there's like a 3-1 ratio to men or something like that ;)
2007-07-17 16:17:28 · answer #3 · answered by Jose M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Nanonan m,
Seems like she does she might miss the idea of having a bf on the other hand. I think she is definately throughing you hints. I think you know what is best if you feel ready atleast talk to her and hear her out then you can decide if its worth the trouble of getting back into a relationship with her good luck shug!
2007-07-17 16:18:24 · answer #4 · answered by Blaqchinah Violation Queen 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Give it more time. She might just be in panic mode right now, and change her mind once she's had time to think it over and realized you're still there as a fallback. If she really misses you, the thing with the other guy will resolve itself on its own.
2007-07-17 16:14:34 · answer #5 · answered by MM 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You think she wants you back but she wants you back as a best friend come on wake up. She loves u as her best friend. You are hurting your own self, don't think she will come back. If she does so, its great, if she does not then its ok. Don't hope too much. I know its hard to believe, but believe me, I have experience. You will love her always, but talk to her as a friend, accept the truth, you can;t ignore it.
2007-07-18 23:29:46 · answer #6 · answered by ach_mayya 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
u say u dont want her back etc...
so wheres the problem?
she felt neglected im guessing and wanted to test how far you would go to win her back, and now your not seeming to be making an effort as far as she can see, so shes very upset.
the new bf wasnt rebound it was the jealousy game, typical bitchy, but it proves shes desperate for your love and wants you to WANT her.
i hope you didnt tell her you were gonna get over her...cos if im right then that would brake her heart...pleae dont!
okiiiii?????
gd luck hunni, its soooo simple!
xxx
2007-07-17 16:19:40 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Well maybe she just misses you as a friend. You letting her know that it's best not to talk to her is the best thing to do for yourself. Let her know that it's making you uncomfortable to remain in contact because of your feelings for her. If she cared she'd understand and wait til your ready to talk to her again, if ever.
2007-07-17 16:13:52 · answer #8 · answered by Txgirl23 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
...she wanted out and away from the relationship and you dude....( her choice...not yours ) and now she's having second thoughts about having recently dumped you so insubordinate honestly. Sounds like she wants some cake....but don't let her eat YOUR cake my friend. No one should treat you like dirt just to establish trying to make a point here partner.....especially someone that calls herself your lover. Really she's simply an anxiety riddled confused, perplexed and conflicted person otherwise....and seriously dude....you don't need to be with a woman that treats you so badly honestly....wouldn't you agree with me? Let her eat any cake out there she wants to eat for now partner......get over her crap and stand up and be a man for yourself otherwise.......are we cool dude?
2007-07-17 16:20:33 · answer #9 · answered by scott s 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
you need to talk to her and let her know wahts going on in person not over text let her know you care and if she wants to just be friends then you need time but im thinking she wants to be more than friedns but shes just not attracted to you like that it very complicated i understand whats going on just harder to put it in words
2007-07-17 16:17:02 · answer #10 · answered by Katelyn G 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋