She completely a mess with things but she doesn't want help she wants someone to do it for her. How do you deal with someone who can't get her sh*t together. Her wedding is 6 months from now... nothing is booked or planned and she wants a HUGE fancy wedding. I am the maid of honor and I have been hiding from her because I just can't handle her.
2007-07-17 08:27:30 · 23 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Weddings
i would offer HELP, but do not do it for her. then she might blame you when things go wrong. she needs to plan her own wedding.
2007-07-17 08:30:29 · answer #1 · answered by Christina V 7 · 3⤊ 1⤋
As horrible as it might seem, she choose you as her maid of honor because she considers you to be her closest female friend. It's your duty to help her! Planning a wedding is one of the most stressful and exhausting things I have EVER done. Think about it, this is one of the most important and memorable days of your life, and sometimes when you have a vision in your head, actually making it happen is really hard. My suggestion is to compile a list for her of venues, vendors, etc that you think would be fitting. You never know, she might just need someone to get the ball rolling for her! I was completely lost, and if it wasn't for my bridesmaids, I wouldn't be having a wedding at all! If she can't get her act together by her wedding date, then she'll have to postpone it and that's on her. Just be the best friend you possibly can be. You obviously have slight feelings of guilt, or you wouldn't have asked the question. Remember why she's your friend and why you love her, and give it all you have from your heart. I guarantee her wedding will not only be a night for her to remember, but you will too! Good luck!!!
2007-07-17 15:55:43 · answer #2 · answered by Mala M 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Sit her down:
1) tell her you are not her personal wedding planner just because you are the MOH
2) Since you did take the MOH position, you will *help* her get organized. make sure she gets a wedding book/binder/box to keep all her stuff sorted in. You may have to be her pinch in the butt when she starts to get off track. Get her family (mom, groom's mom) involved to help her. A wedding can't be planned by one person whether it be the bride or the MOH. It's a team/group effort to pull off such a big even. She may say she doen'st want help, but that's just a giant cry for it!
If she really wants someone to do it all for her, then she needs to look into an actual wedding planner. You do not have the time, energy, and money to plan her wedding along with all the other duties of MOH.
2007-07-17 15:41:26 · answer #3 · answered by LSU_Tiger23 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As the maid of honor, helping is your responsibility. In this case - helping might mean booking her an appointment with a local wedding planner who can take over and do the work for her.
2007-07-17 23:37:51 · answer #4 · answered by Chrys 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Why is she having such a hard time? Is she lazy or are there things that are making the pot boil over? Maybe she doesn't know how to handle stress very well. Weddings are quite stressful. Does she have other life problems not taken care of?
Put things in perspective and eal accordingly.
Be a kind and loving maid of honor- even if you have to be completely honest with her. Help in ways that won't be overbearing or seem even like you are trying to butt in and do things your way. Be unobtrusive and supportive.
2007-07-17 15:37:45 · answer #5 · answered by Too Blessed To Be Stressed! 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
help by giving her a list of local wedding planners. if she's not going to do the work to pull off her "dream" wedding, then she can hire someone else to. you should help out in little ways, like going dress shopping, helping with the plans for the shower and bachelorette party, helping her get ready the day-of and giving a toast at the reception. but don't let her take advantage of you. she needs to learn that a nice wedding takes a some work. it doesn't just happen (unless you pay someone - key word is PAY).
2007-07-17 15:36:44 · answer #6 · answered by not margaret 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
sit down and talk to her. don't hide from her. you are the maid of honor and are going to be a big part of helping her plan this.
let her know that her deligating the responsibilities is not best in this situation. let her know how important it is to be involved with every aspect.
i had a huge wedding and had to plan and pay for it myself. it was VERY VERY stressful but it came together in the end.
be supportive. i can't express that enough. it is so stressful because she wants everything perfect for HER day.
2007-07-17 15:32:51 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
well tell her she's a bridezilla and you will only take over the reins if she will help you when you need her to.
if you don't mind planning it for her.
tell her she gets what you plan for her if she doesn't help.
or let her not do it and be a wreck when her special day turns to cr@p.
if she dallies too much longer on her fancy wanna be wedding it's going to be held in a courthouse and everyone will be in jeans lol
or suggest she hire a wedding planner so she can sit back and just let them to the work - or say you hired one, do the work, and pocket the money lol
2007-07-17 15:34:11 · answer #8 · answered by nataliexoxo 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Maybe you should gently suggest she hire help. If she is having a hard time and can't or won't do it herself this would be the way she can get what she wants without doing it herself. Be as gentle and possible and let her know that time is quickly approaching and that you fear she will not have her dream wedding without professional help.
2007-07-17 16:18:46 · answer #9 · answered by Kim C 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I don't think that wedding planning is in your job description. Basically you throw a shower and support her. That's about it.
If she's this bad, there might not be a wedding. Acting totally clueless about everything might be a good way to cope with this for you. Let her hang herself.
2007-07-17 15:57:04 · answer #10 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
talk her in2 hiring a wedding planner. That will take the stress off everyone and make sure the wedding goes off w/o a hitch.
2007-07-17 15:36:06 · answer #11 · answered by Misty D 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋