How old is too old?

Question

I am 19 years old, and I work with a guy who is 30 years old, we arent really dating, its more just hang out, watch the baseball game, and drink. We have worked with each other for awhile now, in fact I am his "teachers aide". We also act like more than just friends, so I am a little confused, I need some different views on what you think about this whole situation, and what can come of this?

Thank you!

Answer 1

I think this is all up to you sweetie. People can state the obvious, he's giving an under-age girl alcohol. At 30, he should know better. Even still, I cannot judge, just be careful. You obviously know more then a stranger on yahoo would know about him. If you say you are acting like more then friends, stay cautious and try not to get too attached if you're not sure where the whole thing is going. If you are looking for something serious with this man, you are going to have to bring it up eventually. If and when that time comes don't settle for less then you deserve if the answer is not what you are looking for. Nothing hurts worse then letting yourself get strung along by someone who doesn't want the same things you do.

Answer 2

Ever heard of the "Seven Principle"? Take the older person in a relationship (or potential relationship) and divide by two, then add seven. That's the youngest person that person should date.

So a 30 year old should date no one younger than 22. A 40 year old should date no one younger than 27.

This is a guideline - there are no hard and fast rules. Bear in mind that if you're in the US, drinking with this guy puts him at risk of being arrested for providing alcohol to an underage adult.

Your oldest person should be 24 based on the Seven Principle.

Answer 3

Age is a difficult thing. As a parent I would tell you no way. 30 is too old for a 19 year old, but in reality it really may not be. Legal age is what matters. You need to figure out what you want and if he wants the same thing. If so then go with the flow. Just be careful, he is older than you are. He most likely know a few things and you may get hurt.

Answer 4

I dont know you personally, but as a general rule, 19 year olds are 30 year olds are in completely different walks of life. At 19, there is alot of learning left to be done and at 30, its starting to become time to settle down.

Unless you think you are on the same plane mentally, emotionally, etc etc, I would not pursue a relationship with this man.

I have always thought that any 30 year old who wants to be in a relationship with someone so young must have some issue somewhere. But I am not judging him or you.

Good luck, make smart decisions but follow your heart!

Answer 5

Listen how confused can you be your 19 your not 5 years old anymore it can go as far as you want it to go or it can be stopped dead in its tracks by you its that simple.
And in this day and age,age does not mean a thing it is a number that we all have and one day will come to and end like our lives will so if you have feelings for this guy and he for you than what is the problem just because your his teachers aide you are out of high school right?
Like I said only you can know what can come of this we are not mind readers or can look into the future for you ok that is up to you if he treats,respects you as a lady,and maybe be in love with you why not just take baby steps for now and see were it goes if you don't like the path than get off the train ok!

Answer 6

I have found that age doesn't matter. Maturity levels are what matter. Many thoughts are diffrent at 19 then they are at 30. If you have the same maturity level, why not. But remember that business and relationships never work well. But you have to question his motives of why so much younger? Is this someone who acts like they are still 19, If so run the other way. That is a big red flag!

Answer 7

Age really should not be an issue. However, one thing to keep in mind is that right now things may be purely physical attraction and nothing more. At some point things will move past physical and the two of you will need to communicate. Although there is only 11 years between the two of you, that is a large gap as far as maturity. His interests are probably a lot different than yours and vice versa. Im not saying it is not going to go anyplace, the two of you will just really have to work at it.

Answer 8

Age doesn't matter but then you have to ask yourself what you and someone who is 11 years older than you could possibly have in common? He has lived much longer than you, therefore has experienced much more out of life. If you two have things in common then the age shouldn't play a part but even though you guys are friends he still could be too old for you being that he is 11 years older. You will have to figure this one out. Also, the fact that you work with him could spell trouble too. Never mix work with pleasure. It ends up being a bad idea. Good luck.

Answer 9

Well first off you should not be out drinking with anyone cuz your only 19. He can get in real trouble for that so watch out...
other than that you can do whatever you want as long as your parents say its ok (they should know even if your old enough to date older men)
To me age ain't nothin but a number so if you like being with him and want to be in a relationship (make sure its what he really wants) then be together
Good Luck

Answer 10

I don't think the age difference is too great, though personally I'd stop after 10 years, but that's just me.
Both of you seem to get along quite well. I think you should find out how he feels though.

Side note: Princess Diana was 19 when she married Prince Charles who was 33. Not a good example since the marriage ended.
My parents were 15 yrs. apart and they stayed married for 42 yrs. until death did them part.