I am a 27 year old guy and I feel like an absolute failure since I have never been in a romantic relationship. I am alright looking, traveled the world, owned my own house and work as a pilot in the aviation industry. People looking at my life seem to think I have it all. The thing is I consider all these things I have done a failure because of the fact I have never had a girlfriend or any genuine friends. I cry often when I am alone.
I had hopes and dreams once of getting married and having a family. Will it ever happen? I sometimes feel like just flying my plane into a mountain (no passengers on board) How can I find happiness? I am good person I just find it really hard to meet genuine honest people!
2007-07-17 02:46:02 · 22 answers · asked by Anonymous in Health ➔ Mental Health
Maybe you are looking in the wrong places or you just haven't found someone special enough to share your exciting life. I'm sorry you feel this way, I'm sure it's frustrating. Step it up with the dating thing. Don't just go to bars, try speed dating or going on a singles cruise or something like that. Join clubs and community organizations that interest you and I'm sure you'll meet some cool people. Good luck, and the most important thing...stay positive!
2007-07-17 02:58:56 · answer #1 · answered by Summer 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't judge yourself so harshly. You sound like you have accomplished alot in 27 years and that's something to be proud of. Perhaps you are shy. I don't know.
If you are crying when you are alone it is because you may be depressed. Go to your doctor for a complete physical and let the doctor know that you are feeling depressed and would like a referral to counselling. There is absolutely nothing wrong with seeing a professional even for a short while. Sometimes we don't realize what are problems really are.
Please see a professional. It's private by law so no one needs to be told. Perhaps you have a family member you can trust or a co-worker. You are not a failure. Just don't use that word for yourself. How can you be a failure when you have accomplished so much before you turned 30?
Please seek counselling. You have a lot going for you and I hope you find happiness soon. Whatever you do, don't give up. Seek clergy advice even if it's not your church but please reach out to someone.
Good luck.
2007-07-17 03:08:08 · answer #2 · answered by Tellin' U Da Truth! 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Its honestly hard to see how you have failed, but I do understand loneliness and never having been in a serious relationship, and I'm only 2 years younger. You seem to have all the qualities anyone would want in a partner. You're productive, independant and your job is something many would consider exciting and maybe even amazing. perhaps you need to put yourself into more social situations. Be it trying new things such as taking a class somewhere (whatever your interests may be you can pretty much find a class about it at the local college or community center) or its possible you have some sort of social anxiety (which I have and has kept me from making any friends or relationships). You definitely sound depressed, so I'd suggest talking to someone. Someone close and that you trust or a counselor/therapist/or even your pastor (or whichever religion you belong to if you do). I can never seem to convince myself of this, but perhaps you can. You're young. Be patient with yourself and try to feel proud of what you have accomplished, which is alot imo. Good luck.
2007-07-17 03:25:42 · answer #3 · answered by AD 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Ok, if you fly your plane into the side of a mountain, the girl of your dreams can't meet you the next day, right? You'll miss out & someone else gets her. It sounds to me that you have been so busy achieving your goals, you havn't had time to meet anyone. Relax now you have accomplished so much in such a short amount of time, it's unbelievable. Maybe now that you have this you just need to take some time to enjoy people in ways many above me have suggested. You have so much to offer, try a church group also. I don't like preeching but you do have to trust the man with the plan. Maybe you just haven't met someone that deserves a quality person like yourself. As for friends take the time to be one, and you shall have one. Don't isolate yourself . As for the medication I don't think pilots are allowed to fly on that, so you could try accupunture therapy for depression. It really doesn't hurt at all. It works. Or just counciling. Good Luck
2007-07-17 04:06:14 · answer #4 · answered by Animalfriend 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
After having been very close to death with my body broken and hospitalized for 8 months in my early 20's, I know how valuable every day of my life is and am thankful for each day I have. There was a time when I thought "is this all there is" as well. But I have to tell you that this is great compared to what I went through after my accident & after coming home alive from Iraq. Life continues to get better with every year. The older you get, the more confident you become and more comfortable with just being yourself. You also realize that the most important things in life aren't "things" but the people you love and the memories you make. Enjoy being young and healthy. Look around you & I guarantee you can find quite a few things to be happy about and thankful for! Feel better! Everyone has a purpose!
2016-04-01 08:29:16 · answer #5 · answered by ? 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I am in the same boat as you brotha, although I'm three years younger. I have a college degree, my own car, place, and a good job. But I've never been in a serious relationship, never had a gf for over a month and I am desperately seeking the joy and fulfillment of a special someone in your life. At times you do feel unfulfilled and depressed. But think of all those people in committed relationships/marriages that are also unhappy. So it's hard to predict how the grass is on the other side. Just look at your current situation/life as it is and realize how good you have it. You're not dying, you're not sick, you're not homeless, you're not oppressed, etc. I hope that helps brotha, please be a peace with life, with yourself and know that you are important and you are making a difference in someone's life (parents, friends, coworkers). Take care!
2007-07-17 03:05:18 · answer #6 · answered by Argo 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I dated a pilot once and he was fascinating! I'm certain you are too. 27 is NOT too old to begin a relationship. From the sounds of it, you are really ready to have someone in your life.
Gotta meet people, though. But where?
My ideas might not be so great, but others may have better.
Church, Barnes & Noble, library, Starbucks. I know...not so good.
Perhaps you could do some volunteer work in your community. You could meet some very interesting people and you would also find new meaning to you life.
GIVE IT A TRY!! YA NEVER KNOW!!!
2007-07-17 03:12:10 · answer #7 · answered by Ophelia 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Dear Mr. Sad............All of the symptoms you describe, including your apparent social anxiety are related (you probably already know this) to depression. Depression is very easily treated with some of the new SSRI class of medications. Depression can be a fatal illness if left untreated. I am a living example of what depression can do to someone's life. It destroyed mine but I was able to fight back with the help of medication. Today I am stronger and happier than I have ever been. My screenname could have been 'Mr. Sad' from the time that I was a child. How unfortunate that I spent so much of my life in the grip of depression and anxiety.................best wishes
2007-07-17 03:06:18 · answer #8 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
Trust me...I feel your pain when it comes to loneliness, but it will eventually get better...just open yourself up to people a little more...Just start talking to random people in random places, like the grocery store...you can actually have some pretty good conversations with people...Maybe you should ask a few questions on here about good conversation starters...Talk to people at work more regularly...I mean..you're a pilot right, so maybe you have a co pilot to fly with (I really don't know...I'm just guessing)...JUST REMEMBER...THERE IS A POINT IN LIVING BECAUSE:
FOR EVERY JACK, THERE IS A JILL....
I really hope this helps! :) ♥
2007-07-17 03:03:12 · answer #9 · answered by ♥Skippy♥ 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
you are being way to hard on yourself you already have all those wonderful qualities about your self most women want an honest and career oriented guy, you have not failed and you should be proud of yourself for all the goals you have reached, get out more go to the mall and grocery stores you would be amazed how many people you will meet in a grocery store(that is where i met my husband) don't give up on yourself and don't give up on love , you will find it when you least expect it , and your worth it
2007-07-17 03:11:24 · answer #10 · answered by tnsupermomwhit 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋