multiple times, and had forgiven them, do you think that forgiving them means they need to still be close in your life?
2007-07-16 12:08:13 · 29 answers · asked by Michele M 1 in Society & Culture ➔ Religion & Spirituality
No. There's a good chance they will continue this behavior. Forgive, then get away from them.
2007-07-16 12:13:29 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Let's be perfectly clear about this. Every time you forgive an emotionally abusive person, you are setting yourself up for more abuse. Everyone can be an occasional azzhole, it's part of being a human being. Forgiving the occasional outburst makes you a sensitive and caring person. If the abuse is part of a pattern and is chronically repeated, you owe it to yourself to get the hell out of the relationship. You are not someones punching bag and nobody has the right to use you as a target for their repeated verbal abuse. I say, forgive them twice if they're a friend. Forgive them three times if they're a lover. Forgive them until they're 18, if they're your own child. Any more abuse than those limits, put them out of your life forever. You have an obligation to yourself to keep your own life worth living. You do not have to tolerate the abuse of someone who fails to respect you as a person.
2007-07-16 12:28:34 · answer #2 · answered by Diogenes 7 · 1⤊ 1⤋
No, like all the others have said, this person does not need to remain in your life just because you've forgiven them. Forgiveness is between you and the Lord. Let go, let God! And may His peace and blessings be upon you!
2007-07-16 12:23:34 · answer #3 · answered by blessed1 3 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, it just means forgive them so you can go on in life without any bitterness in your heart that can keep you down.
I had an abusive father, he passed away when I was seventeen and I just recently forgave him. You would not believe the difference in my attitude now that I have gotten rid of the anger.
My situation is a little different but, same concept.
2007-07-16 12:16:17 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
People NEVER change. If they were emotionally abusive once they are capable of doing so again. No religious experience or therapy will change them either.
Move on, there's no safety here.
EDIT:
Tod-
Saul went from being over the top Jew to Paul over the top Christian but his nature was the same he was crazy into whatever he believed. Basic nature doesn't change behavior may. I quit smoking and lost weight but I didn't change WHAT I am. An abuser is an abuser damned or saved. Otherwise when you were saved you'd become an entirely different person and you know damn well you are the same guy just emotionally relieved and sober. This is the same "Magic" thinking that makes you guys think you can make gay people stop being gay and hurting many. This is why they keep letting child molesters out of jail and why 99.9% molest again. Get it through your primitive brain unless someone damage your brain you will not change your nature.
Blessed Friggin Be!
2007-07-16 12:16:24 · answer #5 · answered by ♥Gnostic♥ 4 · 1⤊ 3⤋
God Bless you...
NO. Forgiving them has nothing to do with having them still be a part of your life. When Jesus said to the woman who was to be stoned "Go and sin no more" do you think He meant to go back to where she had been living, and hang around the same people? I don't, not for one minute.
Forgiving is NOT the same as forgetting. If someone punches me in the nose 15 times, and I forgive them each time, and they are ready to punch me for the 16th time, don't you think I had ought to move out of the way?
It's OKAY to not want to be around someone who has continually hurt you. It's not ok to not forgive them. Forgive them, and move on--get out of the situation. Just don't strike back.
2007-07-16 12:18:01 · answer #6 · answered by Todd J 3 · 3⤊ 1⤋
No. You can forgive them and not dwell on their transgression against you and should still be able to keep them and their negative influence out of your life. You can't forgive someone then let them back in because you're just setting yourself up to allow them to do it to you again.
Of course I'm the type who burns bridges behind me and I have not regretted a single burnt bridge yet.
2007-07-16 12:16:25 · answer #7 · answered by swordarkeereon 6 · 2⤊ 0⤋
No. Forgiving them isn't something you do for them, but it gives YOU peace. You don't even have to tell them you have forgiven them. Once you forgive someone you no longer carry around all that hate and resentment anymore.
2007-07-16 12:11:39 · answer #8 · answered by Y!A P0int5 Wh0r3 5 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Life is too short to waste it by letting an emotionally abusive person stay in my life.
Bye bye baby. Have a good life.
2007-07-16 12:12:34 · answer #9 · answered by kiwi 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
No, girl! It does not! You absolutely do NOT need to be close. Take care of yourself. Stay far away from people like that.
Emotional and verbal abuse turns physical most of the time.
Get out as fast as you can, as soon as you can.
You can forgive them....but get out!
2007-07-16 12:12:46 · answer #10 · answered by batgirl2good 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋