Work Situation-Help! I couldn't find an appropriate category. I hope this will do. I'm an easygoing person...

Question

& I try to get along with people everywhere especially at work. This is my story and I need your serious thoughts.
Last week someone sent me a Baby Gap gift card @ work because I'm expecting but because I usually don't get my mail at home I had it sent to my work. The card was supposed to arrive last week Wednesday but I forgot about it since I had been leaving work earlier than normal. Today I asked one of the 2 girls that work at the reception about it and she said she had seen it on her deskmate's desk last week. So when she came in, I asked her and she told me she threw it away after seeming like she didn't know what I was talking about. What made me upset is she said, "I thought it was junk mail and I know junk mail when I see it." After explaining again to her that it was a card from American Express she said she'd call them and I said "let me know" and I left. Note: She just got the position internally, just left college.
Read on; I've pasted our email exchange thereafter.

I sent email from AX with message:
Here is the info. Please do something about it.
Her: I called American Express and tried replacing it and they said I can’t. So I guess I will have to write you a check for $50 because there’s nothing else I can do about it.
ME: As long as it doesn’t bounce, I won’t have problem with that.
Hers: ’ll just get you a gift card for the GAP then so you won’t risk my check bouncing. But it wouldn’t because I have money. Thanks.
Me: I said I have no problem with it and I’m just letting you know what I would have a problem with so that we won’t have yet another problem with this whole thing. You might have money-that’s not my business, good for you, that’s not the issue here, the issue is that you correct this ASAP. You had no right to throw away anything that didn’t belong to you. Being new on the job you might have thought it’s ok to do that and I hope you have learnt something from it, Juk or not you don’t throw away people’s mail…I am furious right

I am furious right now because you are sounding as though you are justified at what you did or like it’s not your fault. If it was junk mail, I would have thrown it away myself, for now just do what you need to do and give me the check or the card...by tomorrow 07/17/07.

Did I over-react? Would you buy her story? I am going to HR with this story tomorrow. What do you think?

Answer 1

first, it is illegal for her or anyone to do anything with mail not addressed to them...even if it's delivered to the wrong house. or correct house and wrong person. ask her to foward all of your mail to you in the future..be extremely nice. inform her that you do not receive mail at your home for whatever reason. if your boss is aware that you get mail there, tell your boss. good luck.

Answer 2

First, it is illegal to tamper with someone else's mail. The card would have been addressed to you and even if she is designated to open the mail for you, she still doesn't have the right to determine what you might want to keep, junk mail or not. She is responsible to replace the money and hopefully she has learned a lesson. You, however, need to have your personal mail delivered to your home but make sure that everyone knows that your mail at work is not opened by anyone but you. If this is something that you are able to insure then you may not have to involve HR. If this is a company problem, you must talk to them.

Answer 3

You have a right to be angry that someone threw away your mail and took it upon herself to "deem" it be junk mail.

It does seem, though, that you turned the situation into a bigger mess than it needed to be. I don't get what you added the remark about her check bouncing, which led to her telling the whole story about how her check wouldn't bounce, etc.

The situation should have gone something like this: You ask her. She says she threw it out. You say it was a gift card. She says something like, "Oh my God, I'm so sorry. I'll replace it." You say something like, "From now on please give me all my mail, and I'll decide what's junk mail." She says, "You're right. I shouldn't have thrown out mail that wasn't mine. Do you want me to get another gift card to replace that one or should I give you cash or a check?" You say, "If you think you could replace it by tomorrow then that would be good; otherwise, a check is fine."

(If her check bounced you could deal with that if/when it happened.)

It seems to me you turned it from what was a stupid-but-innocent mistake (or what she presented as a stupid-but-innocent mistake) into a whole, big, saga.

There's even the chance she didn't throw it away and instead thought it came in as junk mail and kept it, in which case she can hand it over or replace it and all should be well.

All the extra stuff both of you seemed to add in e.mails and how she got her position don't have anything to do with her stupid-but-most-likely-innocent screw up, which she apparently plans to try to correct.

Answer 4

I agreed with your reply til you mentioned the possibility of the check bouncing. That was catty! it would have made me a little mad. You are right about her having a very off hand manner about this, maybe she was embarrassed? I would let this go and start fresh. Nothing is to be gained by re-hashing this episode to all you work with. Be the mature one and move on.
Mary C.

Answer 5

At my workplace, receiveing mail at work is against policy. They don't want to pay their mailroom staff to sort through a bunch of personal mail...only work related.

Check your work policies before you go to HR. If your workplace has a similar policy you may open a can of worms that will get you in hot water as well.

Answer 6

I think she should have given you all of your mail. Let you decide what is junk mail. Maybe there's a reason why you'd want junk mail.

If it wasn't addressed to her, she had absolutely NO right to throw it away, no matter what she thought it might be. That is illegal, to not deliver mail addressed to someone.

Yes, report her.

Answer 7

I think she kept your card. She probably doesn't have money either or else she would not have made that statement about the check bouncing. She probably sold it to someone at a cheaper price.

Answer 8

I totally disagree because you have the right to be angry. What if it was not an innocent mistake like someone said. She almost denied it you said so dhe might have thought you were not expecting it or you didn't know. Think about it. She might have stolen it or she opened it and did not know how to tell you. Report her, it's illegal.

Answer 9

I didnt see you mention the amount of the card anywhere in your explanation of events soooo.... I wonder... how did she know the card was for $50?

Most gift cards are not printed with the amount on the card itself. Just curious.


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