atheists: when someone close to you is very sick and dying , how do you process that?

Answer 1

Death is a part of life... From the moment we are all born the clock is ticking to our death.. Death is not something to be afraid of..

When someone I am close to is dying I sit with them and talk to them, I help them get the last of what they want to accomplish finished... When my grandmother was dying I sat with her talked with her and absorted the last bits of grandmotherly advise she had to offer me... During her bouts of dementia (she had a large inoperable brain tumor) I pantomimed straightened pictures on the walls only she could see because straightening them gave her comfort... I wrote letters she dictated because her hands were too shaky to write legibly, I helped her die with the same level of dignity she showed through out her life..

I don't feel the need to imagine them going on to something after death their life and their accomplishments however small or large are their legacy... I tell their stories the funny and the tragic all of them memorable.. Through me and through others who also tell their stories they live on in our memories and the memories of those who hear the stories...

In that light I will tell the story of my grandmother Porsha... When I was 10 yrs old my family visited my grandmothers home.. She and I went to the store to get a few groceries as we were driving a teenager in a Corvette pulled up beside grandmas old Chevrolet (1965 Impala) the boy in the corvette was revving his engine...

My grandmother quietly said "Is your seatbelt fastened, Sweety"

With a nod I replied "Yes, Grandmaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa." as the light turned green my head snapped back and my body sunk more deeply into the leather seat.. Grandma beat him off the line and smoked him all the way down the road..

The smell of burnt rubber in my nostrils I held on to the edge of the seat in a death grip as we flew down Tampa Ave. in Tarzana Ca. Grandma whooping the whole way..

As we pulled to a stop at the next light grandma said "That'll teach him a Corvette can never bet a Porsha"( pronounced like the name of the car Porsche) The teenager pulled up next to us and didn't rev his engine again.. Grandma pulled into the grocery store parking lot as we both had a great laugh..

I started calling her "Grandma Andretti"..

During the final days of her life we talked about that day some 15 years earlier we had a good laugh at the memory of how grandma became known as Grandma Andretti...

Now her legacy will live on as others remember one of her stories..

Answer 2

Process sickness... I think they have a disease, a germ, a virus something that is making them this way. Not sure where they picked it up but know they have it. And see what the doctors can do if they can do nothing and the person is going to die I figure that it was bad luck to get whatever disease they have gotten.
If they are old and dying then I figure this is just the natural progression of a human life. We live and then we die.
Not sure what you are looking for but I do not need a god to tell me that someone is sick or dying. There is no god that will make this stop. So for me I guess they were just unlucky or their life had ran its course. Pretty Simple.

Answer 3

It's very hard. I cry, mourn, and feel loss when I lose a loved one. When they are sick or dying, I just give them companionship and comfort. That's all I can do. I am powerless over death and I know that is the fate for all people. Life is a great thing, but it is finite. Sometimes I have to remind myself I can't have my loved ones around forever, so I must make sure to enjoy them while I can. I don't believe I will see them in an afterlife, so I never say Goodbye to a close friend or family member. I always say "Bye, I love you" in case those would be my last words to them.

Answer 4

I'm not an atheist, and never will be, but I know that dying is a part of life. sounds devastating? i know how that feels. but remember, life just has to move on. that person can't live forever, no matter how mcuh you want him/her to.

remember to show him/her pictures of you two together and bring special memories to treasure with him or her before she or he passes away. i know if i was the one, i would be appreciative. don't do the black thing, and wearing black and pretending to be depressed so people would feel sorry for you, i know some ppl who do. that doesnt help.

talk about happy things, not sad or angry happenings and do favors for that sick or dying person and tell that person you love them. once you ahve done that, this is all you can do. its not your fault the person is dying an you can do nothign to stop it, so just treasure your memories with that person wile he/she is still alive. death is a part of life, not the end of life. =]=]

--fleur

Answer 5

When people get sick it is called biology. Science backs that up with proven fact. Not some hocus Pocus mumbo jumbo about some invisable guy who lives in the clouds has a personal vendetta against you and has made you ill. Atheists put their faith in cold hard facts. Real, tangiable science that can be proven over and over again.
Organized religion is for the weak minded who cannot... or will not understand the science that is life. It takes the ability and gumption of wanting to be on a loftier plane of existance, to be higher minded than pro wresteling and nascar to understand the cycle of life and the consequences of ones actions

Answer 6

I process it as them being sick and dying. There really is nothing more to it then that

Answer 7

I do what I can to help, ensure they get the best treatment... but sometimes when people are old and tired of treatments and invasive surgery it's best to let them go because death is a release from suffering and I've seen a couple of my relatives who could not wait for the oblivion of death to end their suffering.
Acceptance of our mortality helps me as an atheist to deal with what is the most difficult thing for us humans to accept emotionally, the finality of the death of our loved ones. Perhaps death is a wonderful thing, none of us can live forever and who would really want to?

Answer 8

like most people and hope they die peacefully but once you are dead there is no more you. I saw my grandfather die in his hospital bed, he was in such pain and agony and telling us he was sorry for losing the battle and I all i did was wish that he didn't have so much pain before he died so I don't know what you mean by process someone dying. You are sad and angry that this is happening to them!

Answer 9

They are sick. They are dying. I hope they were old or that the doctor did all she could. Nothing I can do about it either way though.

Answer 10

I am in excruciating pain like any other normal person is when someone they love dies. The only process I have is that I have no power over it whatsoever, and I am not alone.