Do you think we have an inherent responsibility to please our parents?

Question

So many people I know or have met in my life seem to live their whole lives in the tradition of their parents, got married because their parents expected them to, chose a certain profession because their parents wanted it for them, had kids because their parents wanted grandchildren, etc...? Do you think that it we "owe" our parents. I can see if they foot the bill for college and afterwards the kid just lays around and does nothing (unless the kid didn't want to go to college). But don't you think it is the parents' responsibility to raise us, provide for us, until we are of legal age, without expecting anything in return.

Answer 1

I don't think its my responsibility to please them. Though, I don't have what one would call a close relationship with my parents, mainly mother, I do recognize the sacrifices she made to provide the best life she could for me. These were sacrifices that went beyond the basic role of parenthood to clothe, shelter, feed, protect, etc. Because of all that, and while I sincerely don't think that its my responsibility to please her, I do my best to make her feel her sacrifices were not in vain. I would not want her to think she gave up so much for nothing.

Answer 2

Hello Cassey,

This question just hit the bulls eye.

Who would you rather endorse in a local entertainment 100m race? I guess a reknown sprinter. Can you endorse your parents as succesful in any field? If Yes, do what pleases them in that field and you will be succesful.

Life is meant to be lived through good examples and precepts set out by people that have gone before us. Even the Bible which is the manual for life is filled with human examples.

You do not owe your parents anything except love. Everthing invested on you by them is called love. Seed time and harvest time never seizes.

You have an inherent responsibility to love your parents and not please them. When you were growing up i am very sure that they did not continually display pleasure at everything you did. Thats not the seed. the seed is LOVE. Every seed reproduces according to its kind.

Ciao! Your day is fulfilled.

Nuch

Answer 3

Well, I think you're PARTLY right. Too many parents these days are overly involved in their adult kids' lives. In their attempt to give guidance, they end up being pushy or guilting their kids into doing what THEY feel is right instead of truly letting their kids live their own life. To me, the ideal parents raises their children to be independent and make good decisions. At some point, you have to "cut the chord" and let kids make their own mistakes and learn from them.

BUT I will say - it has to go both ways. Alot of kids WANT their independence, want the ability to choose for themselves but when they F&ck up....who do they run to for help in bailing them out? The parents. The parents have to usually pay for their mistakes whether financially or emotionally. Parents KNOW who will end up footing the bill for their kids' mistakes so that's part of the reason they try REALLY hard to keep their kids from making those mistakes.

Still, parents should let their kids form their OWN identity and make their own decisions. But kids also have to know that comes with the PLEASURE of accepting consequences of their actions.

Answer 4

I never did any of those things to please my parents. I did what I wanted for me.
As far as parents having to raise us and them not expecting anything in return, I think that might be true up to a point. At a certain age (different for everyone) they should expect us to be responsible for part of the relationship we have with them. We dont magically become adults at 18, we slowly mature and as we do theres things we should be doing to show that, like chores, respect, etc. We owe them that much if they have taught us that. But we dont owe them to the point we have to live our lives like they want us to. I think most people choose how to live for themselves and a small percentage want to keep pleasing their parents.

Answer 5

I don't think most parents expect anything from their kids, except respect. I raised my kids to think for themselves, to do as they pleased . as long as they where not getting in trouble,and never said a word until they came to me and asked for help. Then I gave my opinion and either gave them the help they needed or explained why I won't.

Answer 6

We owe love to them, not by what they want. While their expectations are high, we can't do EVERYTHING to make them happy. Having children and professions is going too far because that is your life and you decide them yourself.

Answer 7

we are all born harmless. we don't understand a thank you to be evil or merciless till we witness that habit in others and mimic it. If we are raised with persistence and awareness, we boost into properly-rounded little ones with morals and ethics that neither faith, custom, social status will impact. If we are residing with violence on a daily basis, we learn how to be violent too.

Answer 8

No; I agree with you. But as a practical matter, one should make some effort to please one's parents, who did, after all, accept the responsibility of creating and raising you.

Answer 9

Wow...kinda harsh don't ya think? As for your question, i think we owe our parents our love, but as for repaying them with grandchildren and other things like that, i think that is up to you.

Answer 10

Respect your parents, but follow your own heart, I don't think a child should program their lives just to please their parents but know what they want for themselves.