What do I have to prove to get custody of my son??

Question

I mean I have been surprised by a lot of things the courts let people away with. I mean does someone have to almost kill a child before the other parent gets custody. I'm sure it will be harder considering I am a dad trying to get custody. I am just not happy with the way my ex is raising my son? She let the poor boy miss 11 days of school last year becasue she simply woke up late, and this was his first year in school. I have let things go in the past, but eventually reached my breaking point when my son came home with welts on his legs from a belt. My sons mother said she told her boyfriend to spank him because she was to mad. I called DSS to report abuse, and after some checking there house this and that they simply dropped the case. Bullcrap. I am not trying to take my son away from his mother. I just know it is in his best interest for his primary residence to be with me. What do you think

Answer 1

i agree. u should take the kid. but i havent heard both sides of the story. r u telling the full truth? if u r, then the people who gave ur ex custody of ur son in the first place r crazy.

Answer 2

You can get the custody but it's not that easy, you gonna need a lawyer for this, any time something happens to son, like if he has any more marks take photos right away, create a file where you can keep all those pictures, evidence of abuse, school papers, and other documents that you can get to prove that the mother does not deserve to be taken care of the child, with that evidence go to the lawyer (free consultation) see if you have enough evidence. Than go to court if you don't want to spend money on the lawyer go alone and present the evidence. You won't loose any money and most likely will get your child back.

Answer 3

It is really hard to get a child away from there mother in the court system. However, have you considered joint custody. You have him 50% of the time. This way you can regulate what is going on in the home where you can document it for future full custody. You don't have a whole lot of evidence to fight in court to get full custody right now. You needs to start keeping records of everything and document all school records and physical abuse. Until you have more evidence that she is not a good mother you will be wasting your money in the court system.

As far as missing school .......can you take him in the mornings?

Answer 4

Get yourself a lawyer and fight for your rights as a father.If you can prove these allegations,there should be no problem in him living with you and visiting with his mom even if it has to be supervised visitation.
Why would a mother let her boyfriend take a belt to her child?I truly don't understand!!! No one should take a belt to a child,not even her.
I don't understand how DSS and the courts handle things either.Some people seem to get away with most anything.It makes you wonder if these people are really there for the children or what goes on.
Go with your instincts and fight for your child.He is the most important thing in your life.More fathers should be doing this and the courts should be taking a much better look at who is more capable of raising a child in a secure loving home.
I wish all the best to you and your son.

Answer 5

To be honest you will have to prove to the court that you are a better parent than she is. You cant just show up and say I don't like the way she id doing things. No court will give you custody. Furthermore 11 days isn't really all that bad and its only his first year of school. I missed 32 in my second year of HS and still passed. Also, she let her BF spank your child because she was too mad to me shows responsibility. She didn't want to discipline the child out of fear from hurting him. (BTW welts comes from spanking)

So unless the mother is on drugs, not working, or simply neglecting her child. A court really isn't going to give you custody .

Answer 6

You have a LONG uphill battle to fight. But it can be done. You need to document everything. And I do mean EVERYTHING. What times you pick him up and bring him home. Every phone call that is made to you from his mother or your son. Take pictures of ANY and ALL injuries the boy sustains. Talk to his teachers and set up montlhy confrences with them if it is available. You need to make sure you hold a steady job, have a safe place for him to live, and can raise him the way he should be raised. Don't give up. I've known several parents in this situation. Most of them eventually win if they have enough information saved, and some are still fighting. It also doesn't hurt to talk to a lawyer if it is that serious.

Answer 7

It is true and sadly it seems fathers do not have as many rights. You MUST document everything. Get a big calendar and write everything down, from phone calls to bad behavior. Track when he misses school, when he says he was punished (and exactly what your son says) take pictures of every injury every time. Track her attitude to you and what she says. Make sure your family (and hers if you are on good terms with them) knows about your concerns. DONT bad mouth her, just state your concerns. Continue to pay child support, and offer to take him as often as you can. If you can show the "boyfriend" is not a nice guy, that might help. Does he work? Does he drink too much? Is she leaving him alone with him when he could be with you? He should NOT punish your child, just because she doesnt feel like dealing with it. Also, notify the school that you wish to be contacted if he does not show up for school. When they call, (if you can) leave to go get him and take him to school. Write Everything Down!! That helps show a pattern, and missing school is worse at this age because he is missing basic skills. Good luck, and remember to show her respect even if she doesnt deserve it. That will make you look like the more mature and more reliable person. Good Luck!!

Answer 8

you need to establish that you have a better place to live in, that he is in danger where he is, and if the bf was doing the discipline, then maybe have him charged with assault if dss drops the ball on abuse. The thing is, a certain amount of discipline and punishment is not only allowed, but is probably a good thing. These idiot kids think they can call dhs whenever you send them to their rooms without a brandnew wii game set and claim abuse, and they do, and its just a waste of everyones time and money. You had better make it clear that the mother does any corporal punishment from now on though.

Answer 9

You need to go to social services, no child should EVER EVER be hit with a belt or any other object.

Next time you see any mark on him go to the police and file an assault case. If it is on file they have to follow it up.

See a solicitor and seek custody at the end of the day the judge will have your son's best interests at heart.

Answer 10

You need to contact your local Department of Human Services. Tell them your suspicions and let them know you are concerned. Do not ever give them the feeling you think they are not doing their job or they will view you as the enemy. Go along with what they say. The best thing to do is to start a log of your visits with him: take pictures of any bruises or if he comes to you in dirty or outgrown clothes, dates he misses school etc. Make sure you write the date of each photo or comment about his condition or missing school etc. The more organized and documented you are, the better your chances of proving you are a concerned parent who thinks your child belongs with you. Good luck.

Answer 11

Its next to impossible to do. My dad got custody of us three kids back in the 60's and that was almost not heard of. It took everything he had, he had to pay for her lawyers and his and she kept changing. But it wasn't like she was a bad person. She just wouldn't have taken care of us like we should have been. Keep trying. It might never happen, but you've got to do everything you can. Gettig the best lawyer you can find would be the 1st step. Good luck.