hi...i'm 17 yr old girl. last week my mom and one of her friends were talking about teenagers and promiscuity and everything concerned. i overheard her saying that she trusts me and knows i'd never make the wrong choices. i was so struck by this...i'm not a virgin and she takes me to be an angel. i was sad and felt like i was deceiving her. i haven't been dishonest with her ever and told her that i'm not a virgin and have done some crazy things. as expected she was angry and yelled at me. i know she was very sad n i was miserable that i made her sad. i expected her to talk to me the next day and was geared to make it up to her. but she didn't even utter a word to me the next day and it's been 3 days with no change. i'd do anything to make her talk to me again. what do i do? plz temme. it's killing me. how do i approach her? she's been ignoring me since and i don't know what to do. my dad is away on an official tour and i am the only daughter. plz plz plz tell me wat to do......
2007-07-15 22:48:47 · 11 answers · asked by Anonymous in Family & Relationships ➔ Family
I think you should just give your mom some time, and let her come to you. It is probably a shock for her to think about "her baby" doing such adult things. Some parents react the same way even when their children are grown. When she does approach you, and she will, have an open discussion with her about it. She will probably have some embarrassing questions and maybe a lecture, but it's all because she cares. It's sad when kids can't talk to their parents without fear of this kind of reaction. That's why bad things happen.
If all else fails, write her a letter explaining how you feel in a polite and respectful way, and let her know that you are being responsible (I hope).
2007-07-15 22:54:30 · answer #1 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your mama is acting childish by ignoring you. NOW is when you need her! But, give her a break. She's been blind-sided and it sounds like she needs some time to rearrange her thoughts. She seems to be over-reacting... maybe she is afraid that you are making the same mistakes that she once made. In any event, you are not ever going to become a virgin again, what's done is done. Go to her and ask her for a hug and tell her that you love her and you are sorry that you've disappointed her. Also ask her for her permission to get on birth-control pills IF YOU INTEND to continue having sex. An unexpected baby would be icing on the cake...
She just wants the best for you, and promiscuity is not on her list. Question: Did you think you were in love? Or was it just "something to do"? It makes a BIG difference!
2007-07-15 23:01:48 · answer #2 · answered by pia 2 · 1⤊ 1⤋
Well honey;sometimes there are things u can never change or their effect. Our mothers expect us to a certain standard they may have in mind and they always wish for us that we'r there at their expectation.finding out that they have been wrong about us makes they lose it.
I think of two options for you;one is u give your mom sometime alone.Let her accept the fact that she is wrong and that u'r not what she thinks u are.That sure needs time and u have to be able to give it.
if not;you just say 'mom I know u'r angry at me and I don't know if I even should say this. I'm sorry I did what I did but since there is nothing we could do about it and considering that I was just trying to be honest with you;PLzzz forgive me because I need u in my life and u egnoring me is killing me'
good luck
2007-07-15 22:59:44 · answer #3 · answered by t m 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You are repeating this question frequently. You certainly are feeling guilt ridden. I am afraid the damage was done when you gave your virginity away to a stranger as he was not your husband. Your mother has her morals and probably brought you up good to have the same standard also.
Being honsest is commendable but it doesn't mean you can do what the heck you like just as long as you own up to it.
There are also consequences to go with your actions also and you have to accept and endure those consequences.
This time it is the heart break you have caused your mother, the next time it could be STD or pregnancy.
Is having sex worth this just because you see other girls doing it. Think what is best for you not what you see other people are doing.
2007-07-15 23:19:59 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
First, don't apologize for living your life, what kind of sense does that make? Second,be concerned if she hasn't talked to you for 5 days. 3 days is gaining space back. I bet on a 1/100 scale she has told your father, call him; see if he knows, if not, then go ahead and tell him to. If she still doesn't talk to you, give her the reason why you told her; to give her the truth because you love her and didn't want to live a lie til who knows when. She'll come around.
PS: If your family happens to be strongly religious, then look forward to a complete more days.
2007-07-15 22:58:15 · answer #5 · answered by ~Diz Iz Why Im Hot~ 1 · 0⤊ 1⤋
your mom is not acting childish and no damage has been done. remember that this is something that a child and parent go though in life. honestly she will not no see you any different you are still her child and things will be okay. just give her sometime to adjust to the fact that you are growning up.
2007-07-15 23:34:56 · answer #6 · answered by * 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow! Sounds like mommy dearest just got slapped in the face with a little bit of REALITY! She should be happy you lasted this long & be happy that you're being smart about it & not pregnant. (hopefully)She'll come around, give it some time. Good luck.
2007-07-15 22:58:55 · answer #7 · answered by jimbobob 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
She will just have to get over it, it may take a few more days. Moms don't always like it when their kids grow up.
There really isn't anything you can do, just be careful and make good decisions, and protect yourself.
2007-07-15 22:55:20 · answer #8 · answered by whatshisface 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Tell your you need to speak to her.
Tell her you are a responsible, mature individual and that you didn't do it to hurt her. Explain that you took all the necessary precautions and didn't put yourself in harms way.
2007-07-15 22:59:21 · answer #9 · answered by Reo 4 · 0⤊ 1⤋
Mothers and fathers always like to believe that their children will always make the choices that they as parents would like them to make. Unfortunately, we sometimes are disappointed. Eventually she will get over it. Just be sure to let her know that you are using protection from pregnancy and disease. Please try to make good choices.
2007-07-15 22:55:04 · answer #10 · answered by PEGGY S 7 · 2⤊ 1⤋