My best friends dad?

Question

I got informed tonight that my best frineds dad died on Fri. I'm living abroad & want nothing more than to fly over & hold her, but i cant. I've spoken to her & she keeps saying she just wants her dad, at 27 she shouldn't be burying him etc. I feel a deep ache in my heart for her, & so so sad, she was my chief bridesmaid, my daughter has her name, we are like sisters. I just want to know if anyone has any words that i could say like a piece of writing to comfort her. I want to ease her pain, flowers are being sent, i've let her pour her heart to me & i'd like to give her words of reassurance. Any help is with thanks x

I've said i wont bullcrap you, i dont know how you're feeling, but ring me anytime i'm always here. I meant like words from a poem just to ease her heart xx

Answer 1

I Did Not Die
Melinda Sue Pacho

Do not stand at my grave and forever weep.
I am not there; I do not sleep.
I am a thousand winds that blow.
I am the diamond glints on snow.
I am the sunlight on ripened grain.
I am the gentle autumn’s rain.
When you awaken in the morning’s hush
I am the swift uplifting rush
Of quiet birds in circled flight.
I am the soft stars that shine at night.
Do not stand at my grave and forever cry.
I am not there. I did not die

I hope this is use full this has comforted me in the past
regards

Answer 2

It sounds like you are doing the right things. All you can really do is tell her how very, very sorry you are, and be a good listener. Do NOT tell her you know what she's going through, because even if you lost your own dad, your experience would have been different and that usually doesn't help. Do not try to explain why it's good that he died...("He's in a better place, etc.). Just do exactly what you're doing. Share her feelings of sadness and let her talk as much as she needs. You sound like a good friend.

Answer 3

Aww Thats Really Sad x Here Is A Poem I Dont Know If Its Right For You x

God must have know there would be times we'd need a word of cheer,
Someone to praise a triumph or brush away a tear.
He must have known we'd need to share the joy of "little things"
In order to appreciate the happiness life brings.
I think He knew our troubled hearts would sometimes throb with pain,
At trials and misfortunes, or goals we can't attain.
He knew we'd need the comfort of an understanding heart
To give us strength and courage to make a fresh, new start.
He knew we'd need companionship, unselfish....lasting....true,
And so God answered the heart's great need with Cherished Friends....like you!!

Answer 4

Just be there to listen and express your love. When people die in my family there's nothing more annoying than people asking lots of questions or expressing cheap condolences. Of course if this was a guy friend I might share my experience of how my brother died at 21 and Dad died when I was 16. Other people go through worse.

Also if you want to talk about stuff, don't talk about Dad unless she wants to. Talk like regular friends do, about funny stuff or other things. In one study where the husband had back pains, scientists found the pain was worse when the wives talked to their husbands about the pain or what it felt like.

Answer 5

Just let her know that you love her, feel her pain, and wish with all your heart you could be there with her. Go to"alibris", it's an on-line book store with 100s of 1000s of books. Send her a copy of "Apples of Gold". It's a slim volume of beautiful verse that is the most comforting I have ever found.

Answer 6

i know what it is like to be you and your friend. losing a close family member like that is hard to do. it is scary and depressing. the best thing you can do for your friend is to be the best friend that you possibly can to her. it sounds like your really concerned for her. she needs to find a good coping skill, maybe you could help her find a new hobby or interest, something to keep her mind off her dad. try to help her to remember him though because a lot of people will try to get her to forget and move on, which is bad, remind her of positive things in her life, how much her dad loved her, how maybe now he will not suffer, the good times she had with him. she will probably always be a little sensitive about it but as time goes on she will be okay. just be there for her and offer her advice. here are some things you can tell her:

to the world you may be one person but to one person you may be the world.

life is not measured by the numbers of breaths you take but by the number of moments that take our breath away.

life is what you make it so lets make it right. live life to its fullest every day and night. cherish every moment and keep it by your side, remember God is always with you, inside.

also you can tell your friend that her father would want what is best for her and that he would want her to be strong through all of this.

i do not know how sensitive your friend is, but it would be nice of you to talk to her other friends, her mom, or other family of her and try to get some pictures of her and her dad, or just some pictures of her and other people, but some with her dad and make her a nice scrapbook.

I hope every thing turns out ok for you guys, J

Answer 7

sweetie, i don't think any words will comfort her right now though your heart is in the right place. be a great listener as she will need you for that more than ever. keep in close contact with her and be prepared to answer the phone at all hours. you're a good friend and i'm sure she knows you'd be there if you could.

Answer 8

in time she will feel better but always miss her father, I think about this all the time because my daughter is 17 and worry about how losing me or her mum would affect her.
Tell your friend that I am exactly like her father; I would not wish my baby to be wasting weeks crying over me, think of all the good time they had. Cry with happiness. His journey is over, hers had just begun.

Answer 9

For one thing I'm glad she's not a child, but yes it is difficult to lose a sole parent if that is what he was,hopefully you will be the soon to comfort her and talk about things sometimes a person can help more when they are gone is one i heard, and i believe that if you feel their presence and you talk to them it can make you feel somewhat better. I always wish my mother a happy birthday and mother's day when they come around, ad sometimes she visits me in dreams. it didn't happen right away but eventually

Answer 10

Tell her how very sad you are for her just like you wrote in the question. Mention lots of things you loved about her dad. People need to grieve in order to go on.