Sometimes it makes me want to avoid people who bring up this topic too much. As if I wouldn't want to get married to the right person, but it's really hard to find the right person. Or, they try to give advice like "try internet dating". Bleh! Particularly it makes me uncomfortable when they needle me about why I don't go for a certain male friend just because he's muscular and from the same race. Actually there are some really good reasons why I don't but I don't feel like dredging all that stuff out and putting him down. I really don't understand why it isn't a good enough reason for people that I'm just not in love enough to give up my independence. I want to know what to say to people without sounding rude because some of them are good friends who are otherwise well meaning.
2007-07-15 07:18:01 · 15 answers · asked by Anonymous in Society & Culture ➔ Etiquette
use humor. tell them you have the serious hots for the pope.
2007-07-21 05:44:42 · answer #1 · answered by Steve W 3 · 6⤊ 1⤋
Ask them "why are you so worried about my marital status?" or something along those lines. It's the same as answering with "why do you ask?" to a question that you don't want to answer....try em and see if they work. I bet they will.
Then you can tell them that you'll let them know when you would like some help finding a husband, until then you are having too much fun looking for the right person.
Tell them that you want to make certain the person you marry is the person you WANT to marry because with divorce rates so high these days, you don't want to make a mistake.
2007-07-15 07:29:48 · answer #2 · answered by spunion 4 · 2⤊ 1⤋
You say that some of them are good friends. Does that mean that there are others who are not such good friends? If so, I'd suggest you start by avoiding the people you don't like as much, and replace them with people who don't bother you about marriage. That will give you some relief, and might even send a message to the friends you want to keep.
2007-07-15 07:34:52 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Tell them kindly that if you want them to help you with your wedding plans you will do so when you are ready but until then respect your wishes and just leave the subject alone. If they persist avoid them just a bit and they will realize that you meant what you said. If they still persist tell them I feel__angry, upset, (you fill in the blank)___ and I would like to stop and if you cannot stop i will have to avoid you becuase it is insanity to keep going over the same thing trying for a differnt result. This works for me I hope that you can find your assertiveness and tell them how you feel.
2007-07-15 07:28:41 · answer #4 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
I'm not sure if this sounds rude or not-but the next time one of your friends talks to you about getting married, bring up one of the things they dont especially like mentioning. Tell them you'll make a deal with them. You wont mention how much weight they should lose if they dont try to talk you into getting married just for the sake of getting married. Shake on it. Maybe they'll get a clue.
2007-07-15 07:25:08 · answer #5 · answered by phlada64 6 · 7⤊ 0⤋
I understand, I'm in the same boat. Tell them you don't want to! Quite frankly, most marriages don't work, so why deal with that crap? Usually, the people who try to make you get married are the people in a lousy marriage....tell 'em to leave ya alone in the nicest way possible. Eventually, they will. Hopefully!
2007-07-19 12:34:51 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 2⤊ 0⤋
Just tell them that it is your life and you will not be pressured to get married. Getting married because of pressure from others, well, you might as well have your divorce attorney at the wedding. Tell them nicely to back off.
2007-07-15 07:26:26 · answer #7 · answered by Anonymous · 7⤊ 0⤋
You can tell them that you don't want to talk about it any more. That is final, and it isn't rude. I hate when people pressure me for any reason! Hope this stops them.
2007-07-15 07:25:10 · answer #8 · answered by jenesuispasunnombre 6 · 3⤊ 0⤋
When they ask you that, ask them "so when are you gonna croak?".
Especially say that if they endlessly hound you about dating and getting married.
If its the first time they say that, just say "when I find Mr Right" or some other excuse.
2007-07-15 08:20:42 · answer #9 · answered by Terri 7 · 3⤊ 0⤋
These days, telling other people that it's none of their business (even if it really is) counts as rude. The best way to handle nosey questions is to pose a question in return, usually, "Why do you want to know?" or, in your case, "Why do you want me to get married so much?". Expect a litany of good intentions to follow. Then just say, "That's very nice/sweet of you. Thank you." and then leave it at that. Try not to get annoyed, they're just thinking of your best interests.
2007-07-15 07:26:43 · answer #10 · answered by Trillian 6 · 5⤊ 3⤋
try "I just haven't found the right guy yet, but I'll let you know when I do."
As for the blind date and internet datingset-up, "I would really prefer to find Someone on my own, but I appreciate your help."
If you repeat it enough, they just might start to believe it.
2007-07-15 07:27:04 · answer #11 · answered by ncangel89 2 · 3⤊ 2⤋