How many mothers don't get along with their daughter-in-laws?

Question

As much as I try it seems that we seem to have a difference of opinion. I therefore say very little in order to not cause conflict. It's not good.

Answer 1

I am one of those mothers and stays my distance and keep the love and peace in my heart, being she refuse acceptance.

Answer 2

Some mothers just cant let go of their special little man.
My Mother in law critisized and even laughed and belittled everything I did. Nothing I could do was right.
And worse was he would always comment on things like when I cooked a meatloaf....."ah it's nice but when mum makes it.....blah blah" It was so annoying.
I think some guys just dont wean themselves off their mothers. It is probably a good idea to study the relationshp a guy has with his mother before getting serious with him. If Mother still does everything for him and he is not independant.....give him the flick or there will be mother in law hassles.
In defence of the Mother in law tho, they love their son, and want the best for this boy they have raised and if the daughter in law isnt doing things the way she percieves is best for her boy, then she is going to want to interfere to get it done right. I guess it is hard to let go after spending years raising their son.
I am with a new man now and his Mother is great. We get along fantastically. I think it is because he was mature and had travelled a lot. The apron strings were long since cut.
It is a great feeling to get along with the In laws. And so weird after my earlier experience.
I think as women we all need to take a deep breath and cut each other some slack. Try and see things from the mother in laws perspective and vise versa

Answer 3

I think your situation happens among the majority. I am very lucky to have a wonderful relationship with both of my husband's parents. I think with any relationship you have to ask yourself "am I holding a grudge for something" or "do I not think she is good enough for my son?" I'm not saying it's all you because she could try harder too. Maybe you should just take her to lunch or invite her over for tea/coffee and just chat. Make an effort to get to know her and tell her you want to get along. You have to realize, your son chose this woman to spend the rest of his life with so there must be something good about her. Try not to offer advice about their finances, jobs, future children or if they already have children, unless they ask you. You will be seen as meddling. Even though we all know you are just trying to help. Hope it gets better!

Answer 4

I am blessed with 3 lovely daughters {in-law} who are very special.
They are my friends and we enjoy each others company. My husband
and I prayed for God's best for our sons and we got the best. As a family
we have a lot of fun. I couldn't ask for better daughters.

Answer 5

One find that her son being taken by another woman, the other find her husband, despite grown up and married to her, still listen and follow his mother order.

Both have conflict of interest, both wanted to control the man/son life. In the end, who suffered the most?

It is either the son or husband.

I have seen such kind of men in bars and pubs, talking to me as stranger about their mother and wife problem, all they can so is to take it and gulp a few whisky and get boozed. Poor men, poor soul.

Yo, lady, give your man a break, will you?

Answer 6

I have no daughters. I can't wait to have a daughter-in-law. I will welcome her with open arms, and an open heart. Personally, allow the opinons to be owned by each of you (shut up, both of you if this causes conflict- this is wisdom) Build a relationship like you would a child. Do a job together (painting, cooking, gardening) teach her what you know, let her teach you what she knows. Don't say it's wrong...say "I've never done it this way before, this will be exciting" Smile. Like you do for a child. Don't let her gain bad habits (bringing bad mouth gossip or disrespect into your home) but teach her gentle; like explaining to a child. Don't be condescending, but don't be "you should know this".

Answer 7

DIL's are not as experienced as mothers. They are learning as they go along and they have to make their own mistakes. A mother can offer suggestions, but it is still up to the DIL as how she will do things.

If she wants to learn the hard way, the mother is better off to let her suffer.

Answer 8

I am the daughter in law and I love my hubbys mom.... and love his big family. Sometimes, she is a little outspoken but I respect her.... and she respects me too. One time we didnt speak for 2 weeks, but then we acted like nothing happened. So, now we know what gets us upset and avoid those situations

Answer 9

often in actual actuality someplace interior the middle with adequate blame to bypass around to the two events. "Am I incorrect for thinking it is not my fault for the reason that i'm getting alongside with everybody else?" Why is it her fault if she would not get alongside with in easy terms you? of direction you get alongside with all the different women individuals in his family individuals. they have not got the mummy/son courting that a momma's boy has. they do no longer sense as threatened by you and additionally you do no longer sense as though they try to regulate your husband's existence. i do no longer consistently like Dr. Phil of father psychology popularity yet he has one asserting that i myself like: do you prefer to be acceptable or do you prefer to be chuffed? subsequently do you actual ought to win interior the arguments together with his mom? people do no longer ought to accept as true with one yet another a hundred% to maintain friendly ties. enable her have her way specially circumstances and in easy terms combat while the situation is substantial.

Answer 10

well being a mother myself..I say keep your opinions to yourself..If they have kids don't tell them how to raise them..Remember your son loves her so if you want to keep your son in your life then except her the way she is..Just don't give advise..Talk about other things.

Good luck