Does your spouse remind you several times during the day that they take care of you(pay the bills)?

Question

I'm a mother of a 3yr old and 4month old.All my husband does is go to work 4days a week(literally).When he is here he eats ALL the food(that he doesn't pay for and can't afford to buy more of),makes ridiculous messes ,picks fights about the pettiest stuff("why is the lid to the peanut butter halfway off?"(he leaves it that way),and tries to cause dissention between me and the kids(he recently said to me in front of them,"You don't have any authority over anyone in here but yourself) and.."Your mother says you can't have it but I don't mind..she's nuts,don't mind her.".On top of this,he constantly says all day"I can't believe I'm taking care of YOU".."I hate having kids.".."look at you".."Why am I taking care of you guys?".."If I wasn't taking care of 3other people,I'd have this that,etc.,".........I told him after his latest comment about authority that he is more than welcome to leave anytime and I meant it.Does anyone else deal with this type of thing?What should I do?

Answer 1

Oh honey, he has got to go. You need to leave him. What he is doing is mental abuse to yourself and you children. Let him take care of himself if that's his problem. You need to go stay with a friend or a hoel for a little while. I was in a bad relationship like the one your describe above and sooner or later it leads to violence. Protect your kids and get out. He won't leave cause he is on a power trip. You leave for the sake of your children

Answer 2

H) When put to an ultimatum like that I'd pivot on my high heels and walk all the way to the lawyer. S*x on demand is no pleasure. Without the ultimatum the poor guy possibly could have gotten it daily. Now none - at least not with me

Answer 3

I dod with my EX HUSBAND!!! I worked up till the point where I couldn't afford daycare. Which as you know is not cheap! So after about 6 months of this, he did it one last time, and when he went to work, I packed his bags, went to Lowes, and changed the locks before he came home. I didn't even let him in, I juts put his crap outside with a note. I hope you don't have to do that, but remeber this. You can be lonely ALONE, you don't need his crap on top of everyting else.

Answer 4

Change the locks and file for divorce! Then he can pay child support to buy the food he will no longer be welcome to eat!
What he is doing is verbal abuse. Is that who you want your kids to grow up and be like?

Hopefully you are working and can provide financially for them, and have a better sense of the appropriate ways to behave with your children. Good luck to you.

Answer 5

He is disrespecting you and his kids. He's acting as if taking care of his family is a burden. You need to sit down and tell him his behavior isn't acceptable.

Answer 6

tell him he is a Azz hole and smells like one too!
tell him the milk man, the mail man and the paper boy are all hung like donkey kong and guess what these are not your kids they are the cable guys!
tell you hate him and he's cut off for the next two years!
go eat on that!

Answer 7

What a jerk! You CAN do better! You do NOT want your kids growing up with that type of influence. Get the hell out and take what you can with you. If it happens once, shame on him - if it happens twice, shame on you.

Answer 8

the only people i've known in such a situation have gotten out of it. you know this isn't normal or right. he's got problems and i'm willing to bet he likes to be in control. really, get the hell away from him.

Answer 9

And you married this disrespectful jerk? My hubby never has nor ever will talk to me like that. He doesn't even have those thoughts. How very very sad.

Answer 10

you just did it, you told him he was welcom to leave at any time, stand your ground girl friend!