Okay, on the 4th of July I found out that my husband had been talking to a girl that he works with. I also found out that he was lieing to me about who he was talking to (I am a very cool wife, and don't care what he does or where he goes as long as he is honest with me) So haveing said that it looked really bad that he was hiding things. After a huge fight, I got to the bottom of this, but my husband said ALOT of very hurtful things, including that he wanted to seperate (in which I told him to hit the door) Now less then two weeks later, he acts like nothing ever happened. And he is amazed that I don't trust him right now. Am I wrong here, or is he nuts?
2007-07-14 12:39:52 · 15 answers · asked by Brandi 5 in Family & Relationships ➔ Marriage & Divorce
Why do people on here have to be so crude? Talking means just that TALKING, he works with my brother who hates him and two uncles. We live 7 min. from the job site, there was no time for sex. I also beleive that there is more to cheating then sex. However that was not my question.
2007-07-14 12:48:23 · update #1
He is definitely nuts. He is talking to another woman and he lied to you about it. He is hiding something. If he wants to separate, then what is he still doing at home and acting like nothing happened? I think you need to have another conversation with him, maybe sometimes when both of you are calm down.
And don't let him make you think that is all your fault and that you should feel bad.
Good Luck
2007-07-14 12:53:04 · answer #1 · answered by majasim1 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK, first off "Men are from Mars, Women are from Venus." That said, he THINKS different than you. It's out, it's open, you both got things off your chest, that must mean it's dealt with. Tell him it's not fixed yet, in those words, and he might be open to discussion again. He thinks the problem is fixed, at leas ton his end. He probably thinks you're nuts for steaming over something that's been dealt with already. When you talk there can be no interruptions, no TV, no radio, no kids around.
Good luck! Oh, and try to be as clear as possible. Sometimes men just don't get it, us women are too much of an enigma.
2007-07-14 19:48:33 · answer #2 · answered by Jnine 3 · 3⤊ 0⤋
Men are funny, they seem to think that if they can hide something they have some kind of macho thing going on. Why? who know? Yes! He's NUTS! But then all men are. No you're not wrong, but, your are going to have to explain your thinking to him (remember, he is a man). He has no clue that he did something out of the norm. Clue him in so things can get back to normal. ( then kick him in the butt for being a goof!)
2007-07-14 19:58:26 · answer #3 · answered by peanut 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
are u sure they didtn have sex yet? Are u sure he is still not cheating yet? He could be being nice now cause he did wrong and wants to apologize to what he did and mabye he is still continueing on cheating yet who knows with guys. IF they lie most likely they are cheating or whatever. Exspecially u are a cool girl and dont care what he does as long as he dont lie or whatever u know.
2007-07-15 03:45:10 · answer #4 · answered by sara 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
It sounds like your husband is making you sound like the bad guy so then you feel bad and apologize and he can easily get away with the fact that he was lying and talking to another girl...dont fall for it...being a cool wife is great but you have to crack down on ur husband and set some limits by you giving him too much freedom he feels he can do watever he wants and not get away with it.I personally think that u should take action.
2007-07-14 19:44:51 · answer #5 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 1⤋
Ok. YOU are wrong,you told him to hit the door & he is still there. Don't make idle threats - he will never take you seriously if you do. If he is hiding things, he's hiding them for a REASON. He's not to be trusted. Get rid of him NOW. If it happens once, shame on him, if it happens twice, shame on YOU.
2007-07-14 19:50:21 · answer #6 · answered by ScarlettBegonias 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is nuts. He doesn't seem to think there's anything wrong about lying. (Probably regrets that he wasn't able to keep it going without you finding out.) Because he doesn't see anything wrong, he thinks getting upset is stupid, and he can't believe you're still hanging onto it. Men seem to think if they didn't sack her, they didn't cheat. You need to explain the violation of trust thing again until he gets it.
2007-07-14 19:54:32 · answer #7 · answered by Jess 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
from what you are telling!
he either did not think it was a big thing!
or it was!
only he can tell you that!
it sounds like it was not a "big" thing!
knowing how men & women are!
he may not have been sure how you would handle it!
you may not be sure if it is a big thing!
talk to him!
tell him how you are/feel about this!
and if it happens again!
to come to you!
and talk about it!
if you are "the cool wife"!
and! if it was the other way around!!!!!!!!!!
well!
how would you want him to react?????????
2007-07-14 19:52:11 · answer #8 · answered by mark p1125 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
How long have you been married? He sounds like a very patient man.
2007-07-14 20:28:57 · answer #9 · answered by OC 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Since he stated he wanted to separate, why is he still there? He's nuts!
2007-07-14 19:43:18 · answer #10 · answered by bahjij6 5 · 0⤊ 1⤋