Im 14 years old, my parents are divorced, and i see my dad every other weekend... Help!?

Question

Ok so I am 14 years old... (15 in january) and my parents have been divorced for a few years now. I see my dad every other weekend, and I really dont like going to his house anymore. Quite frankly its getting old, and I need to stand up and say that I don't want to go anymore.

How do I tell him?

OK! PEOPLE.. "Because its getting old is not the only reason I dont want to go their anymore" And frankly its none of your Business. I DID NOT ASK FOR YOUR CRITIQUE!

Answer 1

Maybe get your mom to help explain it to him. Tell him all the reasons why you no longer wish to go to his house. Just be honest and tell him exactly how you feel.

Answer 2

I'll bet you you are not so bored if the support payment is late.

I'd also bet that you won't be so bored when its time to get the tuition payment made when ( or IF ) you go to school after you are 18. By then his money will be voluntary.

I'm sorry to hear that you think having a relationship with your father is "getting old". The reality is that he is getting old and you have not begun to understand how it might be nice to dad around for graduation, your wedding, college graduation, the first house you buy or any one of the things dad can do for you.

You are suffering from the arrogance of youth. You think you know what's good for you but you don't really. I'm glad my children left the house for school on good terms and are glad to spend their precious time with the boring dad. I really don't know how I would handle having a selfish child who only thinks of her own boredom.

As for not asking for a critique, wasn't this YOUR question in the first place. Were you of the impression everyone would say yeah go ahead and not go?

Answer 3

That's hard. I never had to tell my dad, because one day my mom said, "If you won't start paying support, I'm not bringing them over!" He didn't, so that was the last weekend we went to see my dad for visitation. I was 14.

I'm 25 now, and I wish I had kept going. I didn't keep up any kind of relationship with him, nor he me. He died two months ago, when he was 51, from a worn-out heart. It just quit one night. I wonder now, if I had kept going, would our relationship have been stronger? Would we have been closer? Would I have been able to convince him to go to the doctor? Would I have more and better memories of him?

If all you do when you're over there is watch a movie every Saturday night and homework on Sunday, or help with the dishes, or just spend two or three hours with him, he'll appreciate it, and you never know what you'll take with you.

Answer 4

well one, if it is a legal agreement that you have visitations every other weekend then you dont have a say in things until you are 18. Just because 'its getting old' When you are 16 you can try but you better have a good reason or else the judge will rule against you. If it is just an agreement between your mom and dad, bring it up that you want it to be like once a month or something. My parents never were married and i had to see him every other weekend even though he scares the **** out of me. I could've gotten out at 16 but he is still my dad and he loves me (atleast a little) I moved 1000 miles away and in two weeks, if i wanted, i dont ever have to see him again. But I still visit. Remember it's not just you in this.

Answer 5

This always happens. You have friends of your own and you miss out on doing things with them just to sit at your Dad's house and watch TV on a weekend. What you need to do is talk with him. Ask him if you can come over once a month instead. Tell him you love him but now that you are 14, you have plans that you have to cancel with your friends to come to his house. Maybe you two could do something together on a weeknight instead. Mention this to your Mom and she if she has any ideas. This is all very normal. It happens all the time because you are growing up. Make sure he understands that it has nothing to do with him. You love him but you want to have fun with your friends, too.

Answer 6

My kids see their dad every other weekend also. There have been uncomfortable situations they have been put in or left in while with him and did not want to go back.
I am grateful they are honest with me and I have talked to their dad about how they feel. Certain things they don't like they just gotta deal with. But the things that might be a danger to them I let him know they would not be coming back if they happened again.
Also, if there is a special event happening during a weekend they should be with him I either switch weekends or if it's just one kid then he/she stays home.
He also can see them anytime he wants to, he does not live that far away, but has never taken advantage of that openess we've offered.
I hope things get better for you. Maybe your mom can step in and either talk to him or get him to agree to just once a month. If it is anything that puts you in danger, please speak up right away!!!

Answer 7

Whether or not "its getting old" you really should consider your father's feelings in this matter, not just your own. He gets to see you a scant FORTY-EIGHT hours once every two weeks. To remove this "privilege" just because YOU are bored is selfish beyond words.

You need to tell him that you want to do more stuff with him. Make a list of activities, go see movies, go to a swap meet, DO THINGS. If you two are just sitting around on your butts doing nothing than maybe HE is bored too, but thinks that YOU want it to be this way (and being a good dad isn't pushing to take you places, because he assumes YOU don't want to).

So stop being self-centered. Enjoy your time with your parent, because frankly my dear he WILL NOT be here forever.
I should know...my mother passed away in February and I had an EXCELLENT relationship with her so I miss her VERY much.

Answer 8

Get out with your dad invite him to do something different togehter. Always do this. Oh Dad i will meet you at the bookstore. Dad will meet you at the post office...always be on time. If he doesn't show up after a half hour tell him you are leaving. Do your part and try to understand that he hurts and don't know how to share this with you also.

Answer 9

if u dont wanna listen u dont hav 2 but the person above me is right i went through the same problem when i was 13 i just told my dad that there is nothin 2 do and its boring so i dont wanna go after that he was sad but he got a game console for me it was super nes it was new then :) but it gets old isnt a good response do what i did tell him y it gets old he should understand he was a kid once 2

Answer 10

Telling us which you in basic terms don't get alongside isn't a good sufficient reason to end the visits.would desire to or no longer it incredibly is which you're offended touching directly to the divorce and jealous of the lady chum. i think of perchance it is it. it incredibly is alright to be offended and mad at your father and mom. do exactly no longer act like a spoiled brat. have you ever extremely sat down and talked brazenly and actually including your father and mom? If no longer, do no longer you think of it incredibly is approximately time you will desire to. Your no longer a youthful newborn anymore, so do no longer act like one. Be mature and talk. Do your father and mom get alongside or are they battling for all time. in the event that they get alongside, ask to have your dad come over in the time of the week and take a seat with the two certainly one of them. in the event that they are no longer getting alongside, call dad and tell him which you have something extremely considerable to seek suggestion from him and you want to do it with in basic terms you and him. Be respectful and polite whilst expressing the type you sense. Admit which you will no longer have been the main polite newborn After the divorce. Get all of it out. See what happens. provide him a probability to be a extra robust dad. in spite of everything if he would not comprehend it incredibly is broken, you won't be able to anticipate him to repair it. Now with regard to the lady chum. Did you provide her a probability to get to correctly known you and so you might properly known her? Or did you in basic terms at once hate her because of the fact she is his lady chum. This woman would become a good chum, somebody you may turn to who would be there for you. If when you have executed all you may and issues do no longer boost the only probability you will desire to have the flexibility to end seeing your dad is , your father has to place it in writing with the courts, or it must be shown that he has been a probability to you mutually as in his care, your mom can not end the visits in the event that they have been courtroom ordered or she would face criminal expenditures. Please i understand that it's not uncomplicated whilst your father and mom are divorced. They nonetheless love you and want whats suitable for you. provide all of them a probability which contain the lady chum.

Answer 11

I think what you should do is talk to your dad and let him know that you are growing up. Let him know that whatever goes on while you're at his house is "getting old." I'm not sure what you mean by getting old, however.

Why would you want to lose your relationship with your dad? Maybe it's just time to move on to another part....the part where he realizes that you're getting older. Talk to him....