can anyone tell my how my husband would go about relinquishing his rights to his daughter?

Question

DO NOT TELL ME HOW TERRIBLE OF A FATHER HE IS!!! You don't know what his ex is putting him through. I just need to know how he would do it. He's leaving for Iraq for 2 yrs soon, and if he has to worry about his ex doing what she is...he will die!

Answer 1

This sounds like a very sad situation. Unfortunately, he can not relinquish his rights without the mother requesting him to relinquish them. The courts will not remove a father without someone else wanting to be the father. Even if he wants nothing to do with the child, he will be held responsible for her support and, if ordered, her health insurance.

I'm sorry you're going through this, and I will pray for safety for your husband.

Namaste,
BeBe

Answer 2

If his ex is putting him through a bad time, he should first of all document everything she's doing. Videotape, voicemail, email, whatever. Then he should contact friend of the court. If she's treating him so horribly so he won't be able(or wish) to see his child, they need to know so they can investigate. If they won't do anything, contact the VA. They should be able to get you in contact with a reasonably priced lawyer.

Don't get me wrong. I understand his motivation for doing it, but I don't think it's a good idea. This may be just what the mom wants. Uninterrupted influence on this little girl. Who will she have for a male figure in her life? Because once parental rights are voluntarily terminated, there's no going back. They're gone. Any contact is harassment or stalking. No birthdays, no holidays, no summer vacation, no graduation or prom, no driving lessons.

And if the mom is as bad as she sounds, she'll be sure to tell that little girl when she asks, 'Where's my daddy?' she'll say, 'He didn't want you.' I've seen it happen before.

So please, for that little girl's sake, fight for her. I know it's hard with him leaving to go overseas, but the VA will help if you ask. If for some reason they can't, contact Legal Aid in your area. They offer free legal services to anyone who needs them.

Answer 3

How can he even be thinking of giving up his rights? I mean is it the child's fault that she has a dramatic mother that makes your husbands life miserable! The angel has nothing to do with it. Just imagine when his daughter grows up and her mother tells her that her father gave up on her. I'm sorry I don't agree with what your husband is thinking of doing. Even though he does leave to Iraq he can ask for his wife to have TEMPORARY custody of their daughter, and when he comes back he can confront the situation and the reality that he has a ***** of an ex- baby momma. But giving up his rights is not going to make anything go away, he will lose his daughter, he will lose the respect that people have for him and most importantly he will lose the respect in himself because he will regret doing this sooner or later. I'm very surprised that you have not tried talking him out of this. What if you were the mother of his child and he decided to give up on your daughter/son? How would you feel and what would you think of him! Thats terrible!!! I hope God makes you guys realize this is a bad idea.

Answer 4

He has to go to court to sign away parental rights. However depending upon what state he lives in he may not be giving up having to pay child support. In California, for instance a biological parent STILL pays child support after signing away parental rights at least until that child is adopted by a third party. His child is entilted to child support, if he is wanting to sign off to keep from supporting the child he IS a terrible father it doesn't matter WHAT his ex is putting him through. He has no right to take out on the child.

Answer 5

Neither you nor his ex-wife should have any affect on the relationship between your husband and his daughter. To influence or encourage him to give up his rights to his daughter is like telling him he has to cut off his arm or one of his legs.

You should be nurturing and caring about the girl...and your husband. It does not matter what the hell the ex-wife is like. If you already have children or will have children, I ask you to consider how you would feel NOT to have access to your children, for ANY reason.

How about your own father or your own mother? How would you feel NOT to be able to see them or communicate with them. This is just cold and wrong. Whether you are suggesting this or HE is suggesting this, it is still WRONG! I hope you have a change of heart and can promote...not destroy this relationship. Have you ever thought about the little girl?

Answer 6

the military will not let him relinquish his rights. he will pay for child support while he is in the military. if he dies, his child will be provided for by the military. and the courts won't take away his rights unless he is violently abusive to his child and then only if there is a man to replace the father by adoption.

even if the mother and the father agreed, the courts would still not allow it. and the military would dishonorably discharge him.

Answer 7

that's a stupid reason to give up his rights. just b/c he's not on a piece of legal paper isn't going to stop him from worrying about his daughter. this doesn't even make sense.

Answer 8

To be frank about it. This is not the place to be asking such a serious and life changing question. You need to seek the advice of a compentent attorney

Answer 9

why would he wants to give up his right to his daughter because of his ex's? first of all how old is his daughter and how would she feel if her dad gave up his rights to her?

Answer 10

I read some statistics (will post below) and was absolutely shocked at what the statistics say about children who live in FATHERLESS homes - so please, continue to be involved with the daughter and encourage your husband to as well.. too many people on here support cutting off the father's rights to the children - Here is the link, and statistics:

http://www.fathersforlife.org/divorce/ch...
Children of Divorce & Separation — Statistics
Consequences of father absence
63% of youth suicides are from fatherless homes.

[U. S. D.H.H.S. Bureau of the Census]

90% of all homeless and runaway children are from fatherless homes.
85% of all children that exhibit behavioral disorders come from fatherless homes.
[Center for Disease Control]

80% of rapists motivated with displaced anger come from fatherless homes.
[Criminal Justice and Behavior, Vol. 14 p. 403-26]

71% of all high school dropouts come from fatherless homes.
[National Principals Association Report on the State of High Schools]

70% of juveniles in state operated institutions come from fatherless homes
[U.S. Dept. of Justice, Special Report, Sept., 1988]

85% of all youths sitting in prisons grew up in a fatherless home.
[Fulton County Georgia Jail Populations and Texas Dept. of Corrections, 1992]

Nearly 2 of every 5 children in America do not live with their fathers.
[US News and World Report, February 27, 1995, p.39]

There are:

11,268,000 total custodial mothers
2,907,000 total custodial fathers
[Current Populations Reports, US Bureau of the Census, Series P-20, No. 458, 1991]

What does this mean? Children from fatherless homes are:

4.6 times more likely to commit suicide,

6.6 times to become teenaged mothers (if they are girls, of course),
24.3 times more likely to run away,
15.3 times more likely to have behavioral disorders,
6.3 times more likely to be in a state-operated institutions,
10.8 times more likely to commit rape,
6.6 times more likely to drop out of school,
15.3 times more likely to end up in prison while a teenager.

This horrified me and I hope all people who try to cut off parental contact by the father see this.