Some ways to get teenagers to open up about problems and conflicts?

Answer 1

Explain "Dante's Inferno" to them. Don't make them read it. And, don't worry about stating the premise of the work and all that. Simply describe the author's concept of a Hell having "levels" and that, after dying and going to Hell, people are assigned to specific levels in which they spend eternity and that the worst "evil" things that people have done get them assigned deeper, lower into the pit and that the lesser "evil" things that humanity can do gets people assigned in the higher levels. Then, have the teens make a list of what THEY think those levels would be for. For example, theft would be not so bad of a "sin", so thieves would be assigned to higher levels. But, child abuse would get someone assigned to a much lower level of Hell. Be VERY careful not to give such an example . . .theft / child abuse. You do not want to shape their responses because . . .oh, my gosh . . .do teenagers ever open up wide with this activity and reveal all of their problems and pent-up feelings and world-view if allowed to think through this "layering" of "evil" from scratch.

Answer 2

Getting teenagers to open up about problems is not always easy. Some are very rebellious and make every effort to separate themeselves from mom and dad. But as surprising as this may sound, most adolescents really want to please their parents. And if given the opportunity, will gladly share their feelings. What you need to do is establish the necessary environment to make this type of exchange a regular part of your family life.

Here is what I mean: If you make a habit of sharing problems with your kids, your teens will be much more likely to doing the same. For example, lets say you are having trouble with someone at work. They are spreading harmful lies about you, they do not answer your questions, they criticize you for trivial things, etc. What you should do in this situation is talk about your work problems (the dinner table is a good place) with your children. Let them know even moms and dads face personal problems which are not easily resolved. If your kids hear you talking about your troubles they will be much more likely to open up about what is bothering them.

Another thing to keep in mind is teens have a strong desire to follow the behavior of a group. If you make a habit of discussing personal problems at home, your children will probably mimic your behavior. You are afterall, the leader of your family and are responsible for deciding what topics are open for discussion.

I understand getting kids to talk is not always easy. But if you share your feelings, your children should follow your lead. (You can always encourage them by saying "This is what is troubling me, is there anything bothering you?")

Hope this helps and good luck!!

Christopher

Answer 3

I am only young myself. I would advise not questionning too much and appearing to be fairly laid back about things. even if you tackle the issue later, at least then you are thinking about it rather than flying off the handle straight away. I would let Anna know that you are there for her whatever an try to make her feel secure. This is an area where my parents failed miserable unfortunately! Good luck

Answer 4

Help them understand how important they are to you. I am assuming you are a parent. Teens need space, but they still need your love and validation. They need to know how much they matter in your life.
Try to approach problems as though you are a friend as well as a parent. Listen to them, but do not lecture. Acknowledge their feelings. Understand and support.
And hugs, lots of hugs.
Teens need to feel they can trust you with information and their private thoughts. Keep things in confidence.
Use humor to help them feel at ease and to open up. Make sure they know you accept them for the unique individual they are and respect their wishes and emotions.

Answer 5

Make them happy first and then ask them about their problems

Answer 6

An electric cattle prod should do the trick :)