i think this is happening to me, cause i lent a freind 97 quid, and week after week they say they need more and that they got no money to get food ect.. i cannot be sure though, they are freindly and are polite at the same time.. they say they will pay me back wen they get paid.is this crap
2007-07-14 05:56:50 · 11 answers · asked by b 1 in Family & Relationships ➔ Friends
pretend yr skint and then c if they r still yr m8s but would not lend them any more till u make sure u get the 97 quid back they owe u
2007-07-14 06:00:16 · answer #1 · answered by DIANNE E 2 · 3⤊ 0⤋
A genuine friend sometimes finds themselves in a bad situation - and if they ever have to pluck up the courage to borrow money they are embarrassed. And they will pay you back even if only a fiver a week until its done.
Because you are thinking like a friend, this person will keep milking you. Decide now that they are not a friend - you probably feel mortified that you fell for a sobstory - but you are not alone - we all do at some point or other. Better to learn how to deal with it now rather than later. Be straight - tell this person you want the money back in installments. Say no to further requests. If they pay you back, good - but they are still not a genuine friend. If they don't pay you back thank your lucky stars that it only cost a hundred quid and never make the same mistake again.
The key to this situation - if a friend needs money give it as a GIFT NOT TO BE PAID BACK. After all, banks are there for loans. And family and CLOSE friends who are in financial straits only end up in more debt - why would anyone put someone they care about deeply enough in a powerless situation? Owing money to family can lead to estrangement and isolation - better to give than entrap.
That then sorts it out in your head who you really regard as a friend. If no-one springs to mind, then never ever consider parting with money.
2007-07-15 08:34:24 · answer #2 · answered by Allasse 5 · 0⤊ 0⤋
This is a test of a friendship!, if the friend pays you back then they're alright & you could trust them & would be willing to help them out again in the future. But if they dont pay you back without a reasonable explaination then I would get rid & i'll be there loss anyway as when they might ever need money to borrow again in the future they could forget about asking you right?.
2007-07-14 14:21:12 · answer #3 · answered by on-point 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
some people observe a rule never to lend or borrow money from friends, though I guess in drastic instances things are different. money spoils friendships, assuming they exist to start with.
has your friend got paid yet? have you seen any of your money? who in the UK has no food to eat, given there are benefits like Jobseeker's Allowance and so on, not to mention savings. Is s/he looking for a job. What's happened to their cash?
2007-07-14 16:11:22 · answer #4 · answered by joe 2 · 1⤊ 0⤋
This is just a suggestion, since i can see that you have been actually nice like feeling uneasy at the thought of someone going hungry.....instead of money that is if you still want to really help why dont you give them food.....i am sure food will cost less than the amount they are asking.....how do you know they are not buying real food but alcoholic drinks instead which they dont need right
And at the same time circle some vacancy on jobs on the news paper and actually ask them to go for it.....on one or two advert. within your capabilities actually go with them to seek for the job.....this should show them that you really want to help them stand on their own two feet....and if they are lying this will throw them off you.......do it several times because if they lie than it will show....they will be reluctant to go for your suggestion eventually reluctant to you
2007-07-14 13:36:05 · answer #5 · answered by soundfamiliar 4 · 1⤊ 1⤋
if these people are adults then they should provide for themselves, maybe get out and get a job...it's not your fault that they have no food and it is not your responsibility to provide for them,...if they have not paid you back the first lot of money then DON'T lend them any more, they are taking your generosity for granted...don't be their mug, say NO....but do get your money back and if they ask again, tell them you don't have it....also if they have children then don't fall for that (it's for the kids) line...they are using you so just don't give them any more, you hould not have to bare their brunt, they should go out and provide for themselves instead of relying on others to do it for them......yes they will be friendly and polite while they have got the chance to milk you...they all are when they want something...say NO...end of....
2007-07-14 13:06:08 · answer #6 · answered by Dazzlebox 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
NEVER LEND OR BORROW MONEY
ever
repeat the mantra
you can say goodbye to that money now
always respect yourself and dont let yourself be used like this
2007-07-14 14:36:21 · answer #7 · answered by ~*tigger*~ ** 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Maybe they genuinely don't have it ,but you should ask for it back-suggest they give it a bit at a time......see how genuine they are as a friend.
2007-07-14 13:11:57 · answer #8 · answered by olivo 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Don't ever lend anything you're not prepared to say goodbye to.........
2007-07-14 19:17:45 · answer #9 · answered by Funky 6 · 0⤊ 0⤋
As sure as hell they aint friiends
2007-07-14 18:26:14 · answer #10 · answered by Scouse 7 · 1⤊ 0⤋