My hubby had an affair , i was pregnant on our 5th child when it started, i didnt prove what was going on until my baby was almost 2, i knew in my heart about it but he was so sly and and decieveing and he kept denying it and twisting my thoughts that it took a long time before i could prove his affair and put a stop to it.
He said he didnt love me, that he was only ending things with her and staying me with for our children.
Its been almost 2 years now since his affair, now he says it was his mistake and he was messed up and that he loves me.
The thing is, i have no feelings for him anymore, ive tried, im still here, i love him kinda like a brother,but i really do not love him anymore , Am i wrong to not love him ?
2007-07-14 05:38:22 · 12 answers · asked by ☆♥ Tinkz Baby! ♥☆ 6 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Thax Malco, im a member there, it hasnt helped though but thax for trying.
I think my heart says move on, im flirtin and looking alot, xxx
2007-07-14 06:30:00 · update #1
Aww thax Beast, and Redmonk, your a sweety, id mail ya but i cant.
Thax all, *hugs* xxx
2007-07-14 07:39:46 · update #2
Love isn't something you can turn on and off. You can forgive him, you can even feel a certain affection for him, and probably you feel a certain obligation to try because of the child. But if he can't accept a relationship on that basis and you don't feel it is right to be tied to someone you don't love, then I guess it is over.
I suspect the problem was jealousy from the beginning. You say you got "prove" of his affair and put a stop to it. Imagine now what it would have been like if you had said, "I don't really care, as long as you don't bring home loathsome diseases or spend money we can't afford on her." Would that have so wounded his ego that it would have backfired?
So often these things mess us up emotionally to the point where we cannot think about it rationally, let alone talk about it rationally. But perhaps if you lay it on the line, and encourage him to say frankly what he wants to do, you can reach some sort of accommodation. Lots of couples that aren't really in love anymore stay together for the sake of the children, or because they cannot afford to support two separate households. If you both agree it is the best thing, it can work out fine. It ain't romantic, but it's a life.
If you're still hoping to find someone with whom you can be more completely sympatico, then it's probably time to start negotiating a separation and probably a divorce. Let's be civilized about it, however, for the sake of the kids. Stay close enough to one another that the kids can visit back and forth without too much stress.
2007-07-14 10:02:43 · answer #1 · answered by auntb93 7 · 2⤊ 0⤋
That is not nice. i would be heartbroken. Dont think i could recover from it. And fully trust my wife again. Knowing she lusted after somone else.
But if it was an absolute mistake and i trusted her 100% i would try my hardest to find the love i once had.
I hear alot of people stay together just for the kids. but is that really the right thing to do? You only live once and you may aswell be happy.
You have to try your hardest to find the the excitment and passion you once had just thinking about your husband.
2007-07-14 06:31:48 · answer #2 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
No it's not wrong. What he did is the most painful thing ever, to be cheated on by someone you love. I've been there. It's gonna take some time, but soon you will know if you can forgive, forget and love, or whether you can't forgive him and have to leave. The right way will make it known to you. Hugs and support x
2007-07-14 05:45:18 · answer #3 · answered by Anonymous · 1⤊ 0⤋
Hey, cheer up I know your the sought of girl I like and you know what? that old man of yours don't deserve you. Look come over here a moment, now look into my eyes, OK , I'm a little on the tall side, so what! A kiss is just a kiss so when do I get mine, now that's better your smiling and ''you know what''? those come to bed eyes seem appetising to me.
Now come to old Red, no you don't need lipstick your lips are fine as they are. I'm coming for yer , Tink, now pout those lips in my direction you gorgeous sex machine.
Hey every one this is kinda private could you turn your backs please, me and this lady have got some catching up to do.
CUL Red (hope I managed to cheer you up)
2007-07-14 07:24:51 · answer #4 · answered by Redmonk 6 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Why did he kiss you. Did he %. up a sign that made him think of you have been fascinated. And to call him a jerk and forget approximately approximately him and take care of him terrible because of the fact he replaced right into a foul kisser and you probably did no longer want him to kiss you. provide me a wreck. sooner or later karma will chew you in the ***. And particular you're incorrect, way incorrect.
2016-10-21 06:36:02 · answer #5 · answered by aubrette 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Wow Tinkz, youve been through a lot girl, That Ba$tard dont deserve you, kick him to the kirb , Red likes you, lol i recon your in there babe. Go on find some happiness, you think of others too much.
2007-07-14 07:32:08 · answer #6 · answered by Silence 3 · 2⤊ 0⤋
Your heart says move on. Your brain most likely agrees. I think you can become even happier with yourself in the future. You did nothing wrong. You are right to want to move on. Good luck in the future oh Fairy one.
2007-07-14 08:55:13 · answer #7 · answered by ? 5 · 1⤊ 0⤋
Your feelings are your feelings. Its like that Jedi stuff from Star Wars. You have to trust them and its been a few years so you have a lot of info to base your feelings on!
2007-07-14 05:44:13 · answer #8 · answered by Me 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
I've been there too, and I tried to make our marriage work. In the end she only cheated again. No you're not wrong to not love him.
2007-07-14 07:39:51 · answer #9 · answered by Mountain Man 4 · 1⤊ 0⤋
In my opinion what ur feeling is right and natural. You know much better than any one else that he is making fool of u. discontinue living with him and make ur own way
2007-07-14 05:47:09 · answer #10 · answered by Deeps 1 · 2⤊ 0⤋