The thing he dosent understand is that I am 3 months pregnant, and have been extremely tired and very nauseated. I admit to sleeping alot lately, but my body is telling me to sleep. I am not lazy, just tired. Also I am a germaphobe, I hate dirty, yucky things, and he says " you need to just bite the bullet and clean those things that grosss you out", well it makes me ill, and i cant stand things that smell funny. Is he right to keep yelling and criticizing me because of my nonproductivity lately(just since becoming pregnant), or should he give me a break? Please help me by giving me any suggestions you can...our relationship is falling apart because of this.
2007-07-14 02:49:11 · 17 answers · asked by Smiley 4 in Family & Relationships ➔ Other - Family & Relationships
Take him to your next doctor's appointment. Hearing from a professional that fatigue is common with pregnancy should help you gain some sympathy. Hang in there, your energy level should go back up in the second trimester.
2007-07-21 18:12:34 · answer #1 · answered by Luvly 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
To a point he has a right to criticize you....but at the same time you have a valid reason for not being productive. I think you should talk to him and explain how you feel. Tell him that you are pregnant and eventhough you may look fine you are feeling really sick...like you have the flu....compare what you feel to something he can relate to so he understands how bad you are feeling.
Also I would make a compromise and ask that either he split the household duties with you or that you will do a select number every day...like 2 or 3 things...that way it gets you a little movement - which im sure will help the baby - and keep you feeling somewhat productive.
hope things work out!
2007-07-19 05:33:58 · answer #2 · answered by JustForFun101 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Yes when we are about to enter our second trimester we experience a lot of fatigue. Your first 3 months have been a huge change for your body, you have now 1 1/2 more blood in your system and you had to get use to it. Good news is you are now almost through it and a couple of week you will get all your energy back. Make sure you take your vitamins and you eat healthy for you and the baby. Eat lots of good carbs that will help you feel energetic.
Second: That 'germaphone' thing you claim to have...sorry but that would not cut if for me. If you clean regularly, the scum and dirt won't accumulate and you won't have to clean inches of it.
Marriage = compromising
He does the bathroom (gross stuff) and you get to do the laundry & the dusting. He can take over the vacuuming and you keep the kitchen.
Be fair. Women have been pregnant for millions of years. We are made to bare children and the world never stopped for it.
2007-07-14 02:59:22 · answer #3 · answered by Jane Marple 7 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He is pregnant too! He may be feeling anxious that a new load of responsibility's are coming his way. He sees that you are not feeling good...that gives him more concern. He may lack the ability to stay calm while it seems things are getting bigger and bigger.
Do all that you can to let him see some order in the house. Do it together. He helps...he feels better. You help...you feel better...then you both realized you are solving this together. Helps bonds you.
His comment to you about yucky stuff: "Suck it up" is so macho. That's what men do best...Suck it up!! That is their solution for most anything. They are logical thinkers. It is logical for him to believe that since you are "grossed out" about those things...you will be grossed out about a dirty diaper. Maybe he feels he will be taking care of half the world and he wants to run as far away as possible. Wear gloves and do the yucky things. Get used to it before the baby comes...cuz what a baby can throw up can be quite YUCKY!! Go hug your partner
2007-07-19 11:43:42 · answer #4 · answered by Jeannine 3 · 0⤊ 0⤋
Your partner should be sharing this stage of your life with you. In the first place, you did it with him that's why now you are pregnant. : ) So he should go through this with you. It's important that you to talk to him about your condition. Ask him to come along with you during pre-natal checkups so that your OB-Gyne can explain. You can also ask for medications/ things to do to remedy your pregnancy "sickness" --the dizziness and nausea. That way you can go on with your household chores. That's really how it is when you are married, have a family to look after to, and a household to run, NO EXCUSES. You have to learn and live with it. And I tell you it wouldnt be easier neither when the baby comes.
2007-07-20 14:22:19 · answer #5 · answered by T'cher D 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
OK first off when you are pregnant it does funny things to your body, weird cravings and such but also smells can affect you too. When I was pregnant with my son I couldn't stand the smell( or taste) of homemade stuffing, craved pickle juice (not the pickles themselves). So tell him to lighten up and get busy because the first three or four months are the hardest, after that it gets a little easier to move and do things but you'll still feel tired all the time.
2007-07-20 16:21:02 · answer #6 · answered by Anonymous · 0⤊ 0⤋
omfg well no there is nothing wrong with you except that your body is reacting to your pregancy , thats why you cant stand the smell of odd things and the nausea and the wanting to sleep all the time, well those are natural, and he is a jerk for treating you this way!!! true you do need to keep up with as much of the house work as you can handle cause honey it will only get worse, but with him piss on him...if he wants the house really clean then it wont kill him to help you.
2007-07-21 13:39:27 · answer #7 · answered by liz owens 1 · 0⤊ 0⤋
He sounds like a real sweetheart. Tell him if he needs to man up and to the cleaning for awhile. Give him a taste of his own medicine, what comes around goes around.
2007-07-21 18:18:33 · answer #8 · answered by Sandy B 2 · 0⤊ 0⤋
I would talk to him. Explain how it is. A man won't understand being pregnant but for each woman its different.
He needs to try to look at it from your perspective.
Sit and take time out of the day for you two to talk. Vent to him but try to say it poitvely. Good luck
2007-07-14 02:55:01 · answer #9 · answered by afj60 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋
You need to try your best to do stuff around the house!!! Dont use other things as an excuse and you should talk to him and tell him he could help with the yucky stuff
2007-07-14 02:56:00 · answer #10 · answered by maggi r 4 · 0⤊ 0⤋