Whats the funniest Simpsons conversation/quote ever?

Question

My favourite is when Bart and Lisa are over at the Flanders and Homer picks up the paper that says Extra, Extra
Todd Smells! and says "Ahh I already knew that!"

Answer 1

I like the one If memory serves goes something like;

Homers (driving) hits an animal: D'oh
Lisa : A deer
Marge : a female deer!

Answer 2

The Simpson's have had so many great moments Its hard to choose!

My Favourite Moment must be when homer Simpson copy's the starting video to the Flintstones.

He sings " Simpson, Homer Simpson. He's the greatest guy in history. From the town of Springfield he's about to hit a chestnut tree" Before crashing into a tree.

my second, is when homer is playing with 2 yr old Bart.
homer:got your nose
Bart: got your wallet
[Bart walks into the bathroom
flushes keys into the toilet]
Bart:bye bye keys

Also lets not forget the classic prank calls.
Such as;
Amanda hugankiss
Mike Rach
or my favourite where The Flaming Moe makes
Moe's bar so popular when Bart asks for a
Hue Jass, a Mr Hue Jass actually picks up the
phone.

Answer 3

Homer - how long will that take to cook (in the microwave)?
Marge - 40 seconds
Homer (shrieks) - 40 seconds - but I want it now!!!!

There's also the tiime when Bart is getting the cr*p kicked out of him outside Flanders house and his shoes smash Flanders' window and fly into the room.

Flanders - Anyone pray for shoes?
Todd - Meee
Flanders - Okiley Dokiley

But there are just too many to put here - just reading the replies is brilliantly funny - "except for the weasel" ... CLASSIC

Answer 4

For me the most memorable/funny quote was when Bart and Lisa get taken home by Chief Wiggum( I forget the episode or circumstances but The kids had been away from home for hours) and the first thing homer says when the kids come through the door is " I hope they fed you because I eat your dinner"
Classic comedy.

Answer 5

I think one of my favourite quotes are both from the episode where homer is having a bbq,

Lisa is trying to stop homer from cooking meat at the bbq and he says "You dont make friends with salad Lisa"
Then bart starts to chant it and before you know it bart homer and marge are dancing in a conga line singing "You dont make friends with salad, you dont make friends with salad".

The other one is when the roast pig on the bbq is pushed down the hill by lisa, bart and homer start to run after it, the pig somehow ends up in the river with homer saying "its just a little slimy its still good, its still good" then the pig gets caught in the damb and is rocketed into the air...homer the says "its just a little air born its still good its still good" lol

Oh and the one where homer is on a diet marge gives him a rice cake and says its only 5 cals, homer takes a bit and says "Hello taste" lol
So marge says "You can put something on it for flavour"
So homer starts to load this rice cake with ham, bacon, butter, and everything else under the sun, puts it in the microwave for 5 seconds and when its done says "Hmmmm and only 5 calories" lol....

That cracks me up everytime

Answer 6

Chief Wiggum - Get lost Quimby I hear they're dedicating a phonebooth some where.

Monorail -
Leonard Nimoy - I'd say this ship could go at least warp 9.
Quimby - And may the force be with you.
Nimoy - Do you even know who I am.
Quimby - Weren't you one of the little rascals.

Quimby - Get that steel drum out of the ehh Mayor's office.

Quimby - Is that the sound of a briefcase I hear opening.

Quimby enters town hall with a great tan and takes off his sunglass's to show his tan lines - After much investigation it has been found that a high speed rail link between Springfield and Accapulco is not econmicly feasabile.

Homer - I maybe sitting here reaking of panda love but at least i have my dignity.

Answer 7

Homer to Bart - let me tell you a little something about women boy. If they say somethings funny it's not funny. If they say somethings not funny!? YOU BETTER NOT LAUGH YOUR *** OFF!

Also the episode where Homer goes to work for Mr Scorpio and asks him where he can get Hammocks the reply

"Hammocks! Homer! That's a great idea. Well There the hammock House, that's on 3rd, the Hammock Hock, that's on 3rd too, then there's Sally's Hammock Shack also on third infact if you go down to 3rd that's the Hammock district"

It just doesn't stop being funny!

Also when Scorpio asks Homer who to bomb

Scorpio "Spain of France?"

Homer "France"

Scorpio "ha ha ha No one ever says Spain"

(or which ever the other country is)

Answer 8

There are 2 from secrets of a successful marrage that I find very funny.

1. At the start Homer, Moe etc are playing poker.
HOMER
D'oh! D'oh! D'oh! Uh, I mean, woohoo.
MOE
I'm in. Let's see your cards.
HOMER
Oh, I was bluffing.
MOE
Ha-ha-ha-ha-ha! Come to papa! I... wait a minute. Homer, you have a straight flush! Oh, you do this every time, you... oh god, I'm choking on my own rage here!
CARL
Hey, don't yell at Homer, just because he's a little slow.
(Homer gasps. The shot then pans up to his brain.)
HOMER'S BRAIN
Something was said, not good. What was it? Don't yell at Homer? Nah, that's okay. What was it... slow! They called you slow!
HOMER
(standing up and pointing) How dare you call me that! I--
(We see that it is now night-time. Lenny is in his dressing gown, raiding the fridge.)
LENNY
Hey Homer, are you still here? Boy, you are slow.
(Homer gasps. His brain speaks again.)
HOMER'S BRAIN
Something said, not good.
LENNY
Get the Hell out of here!
(He kicks Homer out.)

2. Later in the same episode Homer goes to teach at the local college adult education annex. Moe also has a class there Funk dancing for self defence.

MOE
All right, here's the four-one-one, folks. Say some gangster is dissing your fly-girl. You just give him one of these.
(He plays some funk music and dances. Suddenly, he pulls out a shotgun and shoots into the air.)
MOE
Ooh! Ah! Ooh!

Answer 9

Homer to Marge in the Mr Plow episode!!!

"OK then Marge I will never do anything stupid again" before walking into the door of the Plow

Or in the Lisa's First Word episode when Homer is watching the olympics and Krusty says "You people are pigs I personally am going to spit in every 50th burger" and Homer says "I like those odds" quality

Answer 10

When the simpsons go to meet uncle herb (the rich brother). Homer is at a gas station I think and goes into the mens. At the urinal some guy comes up and says "whoa, what are you doing here" to which Homer responds "what does it look like"

Answer 11

OMG where do you start????

Bogey man, funny.

Also, the one where Homer quits the plant and becomes a second hand car salesman. He see's this 60's ambulance just like the one from Ghostbusters. His boss goes through the list of what needs doing to it and points out the only thing that works is still the siren. Homer it turns on and it starts off wee-woo!-wee-woo! and then buy me-buy me-buy me !

So funny!!!

Another just as funny was where Marge ( might be Lisa)is explaining something to Homer and Homer says " Dont worry, you have my complete and undivided attention"

Then as Marge/Lisa is talking, a small thought bubble apprears above Homers head with a 1930's black and white cartoon with same era folk music.

I split my sides ever time i see that.