do you need to have a free bar all night at my wedding?

Question

We will be putting some money behind the bar but can't afford all night - do people expect it? Esp as we aren't getting married locally so many people will be staying over in the hotel.

Answer 1

If you can't afford it, you're better off having a dry reception than making people pay for their drinks. Either that or just elope.

Answer 2

I think that people do expect it. But I think that you would need to display when the bar would be open and when it would not be. I would be kind of upset if I were drinking, then all of a sudden i go up to the bar and it's closed.

My response is based on the fact that you are providing your own liquor, if you are not (for example you are having it at a hotel or a country club) then ignore this.

It's kind of like once you have paid for the bartender, the glassware, etc, the cost to have the bar open for an extra hour or two is minimal. your just paying for liquor and no overhead. So maybe like an extra $40 for the bartender's time and $150 for actual liquor consumed in two hours.

Anyway, if you can't afford it, you can't afford it. You could always just say our caterer requires that liquor stops being served and hour before the event ends and it will take some of the pressure off.

Answer 3

I am only doing an open bar for 2 hours. It gets really expensive and considering my wedding is large and expensive without the alcohol, I think 2 hours should be enough. I don't want people to get out of hand and not be able to drive home etc. I read in every mag thats its tacky to not offer free booze but personally i think its a bunch of bull...if you want to get smashed at my wedding, you can pay for it. I want to enjoy the company of my guests not have to watch out for them because they had one too many. Plus, everyone I've asked (who is coming to my wedding) says 2 hours is just enough. Go with what you can afford not with what other people tell you...especially when they demand free booze all night.

Answer 4

Yes. People expect it. The main thing is bulk saves money, maybe a signature drink like a mojito or cosmo for the evening, I made stirrers with our names and some festive garnishing for my wedding reception.

I had wine and beer for my engagement and the waiters kept keeping the guests happy with full glasses and apps. Get the same bottle of wine (red and white) and a mid level grade beer. I guess it's about balancing, if you don't have a full bar get good music and good service. You just have to make sure people are happy with something. Be creative.

Answer 5

People handle the bar situation in so many different ways now. I have heard that technically it is tacky to NOT have an open bar. But, it can be so expensive, people often opt for cash bars. I have also been to weddings where they have open bar during the cocktail hour only, and a cash bar the rest of the night. Sometimes you can set it up so that beer, wine, and sodas are free, but hard alcohol has to be paid for. I think you just have to do what your budget will allow.

Answer 6

Unfortunately most people I've seen online and especially here seem to think that a wedding reception is synonymous with alcohol being at the wedding, especially if it is an open bar. (I said most people, not everyone, thankfully there are people that don't expect an open bar at every reception they attend)

You do NOT need to have an open bar all night. You do NOT need to have alcohol at your reception at ALL actually.

Have your reception the way you want it. If you want it to be an open bar for a few hours (or until the money runs out) then go ahead. It is your budget and your money.

Of all the receptions I've gone to, I have never seen an open bar. Only a cash bar.

:)

Answer 7

As a guest, I would appreciate the fact that you are treating your guests (and not having them pay for it!) - even if the bar closes down early.
Another option for you: limit the alcohol to only wine and beer, or certain cocktails, and then you may get "more for your money". Ask the hotel about this, it is a common situation.

Answer 8

Yes, it's tacky to make people pay for their own drinks. This idea holds regardless of what kind of event or not.

Would you invite someone to your home and expect them to pay for their drinks? No, of course.

The same applies to a wedding. Anytime you formal invite someone to join you to celebrate YOUR (and your Fi's day, just trying to emphasize the host part) day, you should pay for them.

I would be tacky not to. This includes provides beverages for them.

Think of a wedding as the equivalent to inviting people into your home. You would not ask someone to pay for their own meal and drinks in your home, so why would you at a wedding.

Just b/c you are having it at a different location, with more people; does not mean you can be lacked on a general rule of hosting. If you can't afford to pay for drinks, maybe your reception site is too expensive or maybe you invited too many people.

Answer 9

i personally think it's tacky for guests to expect an open bar at a wedding. anymore these days people view weddings as an excuse to tie on a free drunken night. not actually be there in support of the two people that are getting married. you supply them with food, cake, and a great time. if they want to get drunk, let them pay. plus an open bar all night long can add up fast. i know my hubby and his friends can drink beer like none other and easily down 3 or 4 beers an hour. times that by the amount of people at the wedding and cost per drink and you are looking at thousands of extra dollars.

Answer 10

ABSOLUTELY! You have to have a free bar. It's rude not to. If you can't afford to have an open bar, then have just wine and beer, or have a punch or a signature cocktail. But you can't make your guests pay for their own drinks. It's just bad etiquette.