Druggy Boyfriend..plz help?

Question

My b/f isn't a huge pot smoker but he does do it a couple times a week. My mom knows about this but doesnt mind to much she just thinks i can do better. We've been dating for 3 years now and he knows his drug use bothers me and has tried to quit a couple times and it works for awhile but then when he's with his friends he ends up calling me stoned out of his mind. Should i leave him or stay and try to work it out?

ok well i found out about his smoking behavior 1 year after we started dating. And its not the smoking that bugs me to much i meen i've dated other stoners..but he also has had pill addictions and drinks occaisonally. He is 17 and i am 16. so yes we are young.

Answer 1

Be afraid—very afraid. Run away! Run away!!

Answer 2

First off did you know that he smoked before you started to date him? Did you find out after a little while that he smoked? If you already new then why are you complaining about it now. If it bugged you the subject should have been brought up way earlier in the relationship. You cannot make him quit he has to want to quit. I would talk to him about it. If he does not stop and you do not want to date a stoner ... then it is time to drop him.

Answer 3

I mean it could be a lot worse, think about it. It's just a little weed a few times a week. More people smoke it than you would imagine. And I don't know how you would tell over the phone, it doesn't affect you that much that you would be able to tell unless he just gets completely brain-dead when he smokes. As long as he keeps it to a minimum and he isn't like needing to smoke all the time where it would interfere with your alone time. And it's not like he is spending all his money on it or selling it or anything. Even your mother doesn't even think it's too big of a deal. I wouldn't say it's a reason to break up with him. Is it really affecting you that much or is it just something for you to complain to him about? Really. If it really is then don't completely be on his case about it all the time, that will only make him want to go smoke. Just bring it up now and then and be like it would really make me a lot happier if you would stop this- for me. In time he'll grow out of it anyways. If you love him and you really want to be with him, stay with him and wait it out. Good Luck.

Answer 4

yeah i have had a lot of guy friends that are wrapped up in drugs, and i never really stopped worrying. having a boyfriend as one would be a pain. just know that if you stay with him, you'll think about how risky hes being everyday. and all those days, you'll more than likely worry. I'm not gonna say get out and i'm not really able to tell you exactly how you should support him. But if you look at it for you, you can do your life better than worrying all the time. Just have faith. You'll know when to let him go if the time comes.

Answer 5

DO you drink,smoke cigs,or take prescription pills, Those are also drugs just in a legal form not to say any drug is good but it is the only drug to never kill someone no matter what the movies show I've smoked it for 30yrs & most couldn't tell if they didn't smell it but if you don't like it & don't want to except it move on because love is for you heart & soul so do what brings that to you PEACE

Answer 6

Wow...I'm in the exact same situation....i've been with my bf for 3 years, and he still smokes pot. BUT....you gotta accept for who he is...which is what I did. The only thing he'll do is smoke once in a while...and won't smoke it around me. Because I don't want to see it. So, he respect me that much.. if he knows that I'm coming over to hang out with him, he won't smoke it, until I leave or whatever. Sometimes, he'll smoke it once every 2 or 3 weeks. He won't smoke it everyday. It only helps him relieve his stress... and it's kinda a good thing, because that way, he won't take it out on me, if we argue.

He's been smoking it ever since he was 15 years old, and now he's 34...and I'm 30. So, you gotta accept for who he is.

Answer 7

Go ahead and stay with him. Get married and have a couple of kids. When they come home from school and they say "where is daddy" you can tell them that he either got arrested for drug posession, he was too stoned to make it home. or he dead from a deal that went bad.

There is a bright side, maybe you can just all sit down and smoke together.

Either way, have fun with your stoner. WAKE UP!!!!!

Answer 8

My boyfriend is the same way and I hate it!! He doesnt do it around me but as soon as he gets alone with his friends thats what happens. I made the mistake of moving in with him thinking he would stop. He didnt and now I am going to move out and break up with him...All this time waisted.
I dunno know how old you are but I can tell you it only gets worse and it's very immature and disrespectful.
You can do much better. You have made a choice not to do drugs and need someone with that same kind of maturity.
Get Out Of The Relationship!!

Answer 9

You can stay with him and deal with his smoking pot. You can't force him to stop. If you nag him about stopping he'll eventually break up with you because you'll be more like his mom and not his girlfriend. If being with a pot smoker is not your thing i'd suggest you break up with him. Either love him for who he is or find someone else who suits your needs better.

Answer 10

That's a tough decision. I stay away from people that smoke anyway. I used to hang out with the wrong crowd too. He has to be willing to change his group of friends, and tell him to try out a couple of Marijuana Anonymous meetings. Good luck.

Answer 11

Frankly pot smoking isn't all that bad of a habit. It's much better than drinking. But if it bothers you so much, you should leave him. He obviously enjoys it, so if you can let him enjoy it and live with it or enjoy it with him, you shouldn't be together. Obviously he doesn't love you enough to quit, so why force him?