Lot's of times when I walk into a store with my boyfriend, it seems that people just have to stare at us. I am not usually a person that is easily annoyed, but when people just constantly stare at us, and have absolutely nothing to say, it annoys me so much. There was an employee in one store, hiding behind the merchandise, just watching us as we put things in the buggy. So I kindly walked over to him and asked him what the problem was, and he quickly starts stuttering, and acting as if he doesn't know what I am talking about. So we move on, and he seems to make himself appear in every section of the store that we go in. This of course is not the only situation, that has occured but it was the most recent one. Now this guy was possibly staring at us because he thought we would steal, but a lot of times I am wondering if this is a cultural thing where people find it ok to stare at people.
2007-07-13
07:44:53
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12 answers
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asked by
Video_Production
6
in
Society & Culture
➔ Etiquette
Different than what? We don't go anywhere with purple hair and piercings everywhere if that's what you mean.
2007-07-13
07:51:18 ·
update #1
Idahomike, don't give me that crap about retail being able to profile someone. It isn't fair, because my boyfriend has darker skin its ok to just stare at him? I worked in retail for 7 years, and plenty of caucasians stole from our store and we didn't profile them. Would it be ok if we started looking at every white man as a serial killer or child molestor? No it wouldn't be right.
2007-07-13
07:55:32 ·
update #2
Jason J, it happens the moment I walk into the store, when I haven't even picked up anything. I am not assuming that all of this is racial, but some may be. But I just kind of think that maybe certain cultures find it ok to stare thats all. I am aware of the signs you look for, they taught us that when I worked in retail. I don't act suspicious because I am not doing anything wrong.
2007-07-13
08:02:46 ·
update #3
Maybe I should add this too, I am not only talking about being in a store, it can be anywhere I go, and just random people stare, not just employees.
2007-07-13
11:01:20 ·
update #4
i would say hi and wave at them. if they continue then boycott their business u can take ur money elsewhere with out being stared at.
2007-07-13 07:51:42
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answer #1
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answered by spadezgurl22 6
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I work security and have for many years. I can honestly say... in house security will watch you and they don't hide the fact that they do. Their purpose is to stop the theft. If this works... so be it. I also know it depends on the area or city you shop in. Yes... white security officers watch black shoppers more than white. I've seen it and experienced it too. But... they watch white people too. It is just not as obvious to you because you are not in the white person's position. I have seen them go off on security personnel also. Like I said... I don't believe it is a personal thing or racial. Shop keepers and business owners just want to protect their property. If I had a business I would do the same thing. I would also invest in pin hole cameras and the tag alarms at the door. Theft costs the public millions of dollars and I ain't trying to pay in taxes for what some fool decided to steal from a merchant.
2007-07-13 17:58:39
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answer #2
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answered by fatbabyceesay 5
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How long have you known your boyfriend? I had a similar experience several years ago, only I was shopping with an old acquaintance that I hadn't seen in 5 or 6 years. We started hanging out together and I knew she had some problems, but I never dreamed that shoplifting was one of them! After I noticed the weird behavior of the store employees, I found out that she had been caught shoplifting in several stores around our small town, and because her husband grew up there and knew all the store owners, the only one to file charges was a large chain store. I was mortified at the thought that these people thought I might be her accomplice. Just a thought..............please don't be offended.
2007-07-13 15:02:19
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answer #3
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answered by EvilWoman0913 7
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Loss prevention profiles are not based on race, gender, etc. they are based on behavior. Do you travel the back aisles of stores. Do you look around a lot. Do you look up at the cameras. Do you quickly select merchandise without comparing prices. These and others are all things that will make employees suspect you of stealing.
2007-07-13 15:00:36
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answer #4
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answered by Anonymous
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Maybe you are an attractive couple and they can't help but stare. I notice folks stare at me too, but I look at it more as a compliment rather than being offended by it. The hell with what people think. Put your guard down and walk with your head up high. I notice that females especially stare at me and my boyfriend says that they are probably just jealous.
2007-07-13 15:33:05
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answer #5
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answered by ginluvsrob06 4
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I had that happen at an area Radio Shack over the past holiday season - I was looking at radios on display - and the employee was literally over my left shoulder......I told him to get real and if I really needed help I would ask him - and, anyway, who in their right mind would steal beat-up display items.
I firmly believe employees in many situations are trained to try and visually make things unpleasant for customers they would rather not have.......they can deny that there was intent in harassing someone.
2007-07-13 15:14:12
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answer #6
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answered by Zombie Birdhouse 7
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There are multiple possibilities.
Maybe you are stunningly beautiful and do not realize it.
People stare at you because you are eye candy to their hunger.
There are people who hate to work, so they pretend, by staring at customers to watch to catch any who steal.
There is the racist cultural thing where some people stare at what is different from their life experience ... you have no idea what their life is like so you not know why.
Could be you are overly sensitive, imagining this.
2007-07-14 00:07:52
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answer #7
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answered by Al Mac Wheel 7
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I hear you. I really do. You and I both know what the deal is. I've handled this several ways, depending on how angry I get.
1. Leave the store
2. Pick up a bunch of stuff, get to the checkout and say never mind on all but one thing or even all the things
3. Complain to the manager
4. Brush it off, and go about my business.
2007-07-13 14:50:56
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answer #8
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answered by New Moon Daughter 6
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Either you are a very attractive couple or a very abnormal couple. Can it be that is isnt attractive physically and you are like model material? Or vice versa.
Is it females staring at him, and males staring at you? If so, you already know the answer. I notice old people looking at me and my mate, and they just say how its so pretty to see two young people in love.
2007-07-13 17:19:03
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answer #9
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answered by Anonymous
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I have no explanation for other people's actions but it may be that you and your boyfriend are so good looking that everyone is jealous -- or maybe you're both so hideous that people just can't help but stare.
2007-07-13 14:51:31
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answer #10
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answered by Anonymous
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It is a fact of retail life that certain people who look a certain way and behave a certain way and/or dress a certain way ...on average... have a tendency to be the ones who cause the most trouble in certain stores or other public places... it is called profiling and stores have the right to defend themselves against the negative results caused by certain identifiable groups that have been shown to cause them trouble.
2007-07-13 14:52:28
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answer #11
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answered by idahomike2 6
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